Ambivalence
by Genki-angel-chan
Summary: Naruto frowned, not liking the sudden possessive gleam in Sasuke's onyx colored eyes."So, the child is mine then". The blond shuddered, wary of the sudden change in Sasuke's mood.He moved away from the brunette, and backed into a corner. mpreg sasunaru
1. Vacation from Vacation

A.N: Well, hello all. Some of you may be thinking "why the hell is she starting a new fic when she hasn't updated Nightbloom?!" Well...because I'm evil like that. Mua ha ha ha. Part of why I haven't been on here alot is:

1. School Started. I gots homeworkie and other evil crap.

2. I gots a new kitteh. Her name is Emmy Kay. (My other cat is Misty Lin) She's been sick though, we rescued her from a shelter so she wasn't in perfect health, poor baby. She's doing much better now though, thank God.

3. I am super, uber lazy.

So, yosh. This thing popped into my head when I was on and the word 'ambivalent' came up. I thought of Sasuke's relationship with Naruto almost immediantly. Later, I had a dream about Naruto and Sasuke that was...interesting. Then, I was in the shower, when an up and coming scene (not in this chapter) hopped into my head and wouldn't leave till I typed it. But it was for a middle chapter. And I liked it so much I wanted to write a beginning. Thus, this came up. Enjoy.

Discaimer: Don't own Naruto, It belongs to the genius Kishimoto. If I did own it well...heh heh.

* * *

It would be impossible. He had given up, not on killing his brother of course. He had given up on the revival of his clan. He found that it would be hopeless to ever revive it. Even if he **did **find some woman to bare his children...She could only give him so much. The great Uchiha clan had consisted of over fifty people. There was no way a women could give him fifty children. He would have to have multiple women bearing his children...perhaps ten. He detested that idea . True, it may appeal to some **other **man his age, but the heir had never had desires to be involved in polygamy. If he did find some women he thought worthy...he'd be satisfied with four children... more if she was willing. 

Also even if he did somehow manage to coax fifty children out of some women, the babies would not be strong at all. What if Itachi found out? He'd kill all of them for sure. Sasuke did not think he could lose his whole world a third time. The first time, his family and clan had been brutally torn away from him. The second...he wasn't going to think about that.

Sasuke, had given up though. Yes, he would kill his brother, then he would probably die himself taking the Uchiha clan with him. Though he didn't show it outwardly (for his teammates were near by) the idea saddened him immensely. He had wanted to have children...he had never gotten along well with kids but he was sure he would have loved and cherished his own. He was dejected and slightly distressed at his epiphany and wished he had instead been fantasizing on how Itachi's blood would splatter on walls and ceilings.

He looked at his teammates mutely. Juugo appeared to be in deep conversation with a red bird perched on his shoulder, while Karin and Suigetsu exchanged verbal barbs at each other. Sasuke mentally sighed. It was going to be a long, long day. He turned his apathetic black eyes to the sky, remembering the days that he could laugh.

* * *

Naruto would look back on this day and forever wish that he had chosen to ignore the summons and simply snuggled under the covers of his bed and slept the day away, unconcerned that Lady Tsunade may kill him (or at least beat him over the head with a sake bottle) for his refusal of her orders. 

But no, instead when the bird landed on his window sill (Naruto had left it open because it was autumn and the air smelled crisp and clean this time of year) the blond had gotten out of his chair (he had been eating his usual breakfast of ramen, today beef flavored) walked over to the bird and gingerly took the letter off of it's leg giving the animal a piece of meat for it's labor. The hawk made a sound of gratitude and flew off (Naruto assumed) back to the bird hutches.

The teen scratched his back as he read the letter

_Uzumaki Naruto_

_You are being summomed for a mission. please organize your team of Haruno Sakura, Sai and Kakashi. Then report to Godaime-sama._

_Shizune_

Naruto grinned, things had been a bit slow lately and he had been bored. He used his free time to train with Lee and was actually learning shogi from Shikamaru but he had been getting restless. He had wanted to go on a mission, but as of late Tsundade had been a bit reluctant to send him on jobs any higher than a C rank. It had begun to irritate the blond to the point that three days ago he had stormed into her office. Tsunade had raged back at him as he yelled at the Hokage and Shizune had to leave the room because of the blunt objects the two fire tempered blonds were throwing around the room.

Naruto had pulled out his trump card though. Stating if Tsunade was going to waste his time with pointless missions that weren't making him stronger, he would just leave the village and pick up his hunt for Sasuke from where he had left off. Tsunade had fumed and began screaming unintelligibly with only a few choice phrases such as ' I'll break your legs so you can't leave' (Naruto responded that he would crawl with his hands )'missing nin' and 'rip your spine out and shove it up somewhere unpleasant' could be understood clearly.

The teenager had held his composure together stubbornly all the while glaring his azure eyes into her own chestnut colored ones. The younger blond knew he had won the battle. He was far too precious to Tsunade for her to let him gallivant blindly about the country let alone be looking for a young adult male who had promised to kill him next time they met. He knew that she loved him dearly and tried to protect him as best she could. Knowing this, Naruto had turned her own feelings against her to win the situation in his favor. It was a bit below the belt, but Naruto was bored and desperate. Never a winning combination for an adolescent male, never mind a hyperactive one who was only happy when he felt he was moving around and doing something useful with his time.

In the end the Godaime had (grudgingly) agreed to send Naruto on more 'engaging' missions.

* * *

Sai let the ink brush flow loosely down the page then swept it to the right. He was beginning to paint a large oak tree, lately he had been leaning a bit more towards nature these days. And a few weeks ago, he had painted a Cherry Blossom tree in full bloom with sakura flowers and given that to Sakura. He remembered the delighted look she'd given him and in return had given him several new canvases. After that he'd decided to paint a picture for the rest of his teammates. Kakashi was difficult, he didn't want to paint a scarecrow for his name sake. Instead he'd painted a forest of bamboo, climbing up to the sky. Kakashi had seemed pleased and the next day gave him a jar of good quality ink. Besides Sakura, Naruto was the easiest. Sunflowers seemed the most appropriate for the teenage boy. So only a few days ago he had painted a clump of sunflowers standing in a field together and given the painting to Naruto. 

He remembered the blond's expression the most. Naruto had looked at the painting with an expression Sai had never seen before on a person. "For me?" was all he'd said. Sai had been so confused by the blond's reaction he could only nod. Did he hate it? Was that why he was shaking? The young ninja held the painting carefully but tightly, afraid to drop it. When Naruto looked up at Sai, he had another unrecognizable expression on his face. Naruto transferred the painting to his right arm, holding it securely. He then lifted up his left arm. Sai for one split second thought the blond was about to punch him, but remained still as stone. Naruto's actions were peaking his curiosity and the brunette wanted to see the end of them...even if it ended in pain for him. Instead of punching the artist though, Naruto hooked his left arm around Sai's neck, pulling his body towards Naruto. Sai played this out, several questions perking up in his mind but didn't voice any of them, lest Naruto stop whatever it was he was doing. The blond had rested his cheek against Sai's neck for a moment. The brunette felt a shudder go through the blond's body and a sound that was strangely akin to what Sai knew as a sob. Naruto moved his mouth up to Sai's ear.

"Thank you"

And just as suddenly as Naruto had held him, he released Sai and leaped off into the general direction of his apartment.

It had left a very dumbstruck and confused Sai standing there in the middle of the training grounds. He hadn't understood Naruto's reaction at all. Both Sakura and Kakashi had both seemed gladdened with the gift. They had made the correct face motions (though Kakashi's had been obscured by his mask) for 'happiness' and 'gratitude' their postures had been relaxed and showed that they were content and pleased as well as open. Sakura had made a sound of girlish delight, Kakashi had made an approved happy noise.

Naruto on the other hand, had a shocked expression...but after that all the other expressions, Sai could not recognize for he had never seen them in a book before. Naruto's posture had been odd too. He had been rigid, and shaking. The sounds he emitted were sounds of 'sorrow'. Sai didn't understand this, it made no sense at all to him. Not to mention Naruto suddenly putting an arm around Sai like that and pulling him towards the blond's body. Sai had never been touched like that...he'd had been put in similar positions during battle..a choke hold, a grappling move, an opponent attempting to break his neck, but Naruto's gesture had not been hostel at all...it had seemed...tender.

Strange. But not unwelcome.

However, what was more strange then the blond's attitude, was the gift he'd received the next morning. The only thing that showed any clear identity of who the giver was, was a simple white card with the words _For Sai_ in familiar scratchy handwriting. _Naruto_...the artist thought.

The rectangular box was covered in black silk with an ornate patters of silver cranes flying towards a golden red sun above a threaded blue lake. Sai's eyes widened at the design and obvious craftsmanship of the container. Suddenly he felt a pang inside of himself. He hoped for some unexplained reason that there was nothing inside of the box. He lifted the lid up hesitantly, as though whatever was inside would explode the second he opened it.

The handles were made from a dark gray stone that shone and reflected his face like a mirror. The brushes were made from the fur from a very soft (but stiff haired) creature and the ring of metal that bound brush and handle together were made from a gold colored metal. Sai had arched one of his eyebrows, painting utensils were expensive already, and the thought that he'd never seen these in a store worried him. They had to be custom made.

Shit.

He still did not understand Naruto's reaction. He'd read in one of the books he'd studied that when a person receives a gift, they react happy, or pleasantly surprised or some other variation of gladness. Naruto had not. For some reason, Sai had trouble sleeping at night now. He would think of the boy's expression in his mind, the sounds he'd made. His warm breath on Sai's neck.

Sai looked at the box now. He didn't want to use the brushes, there were four in the box all in varying brush sizes and handle widths. He didn't want to ruin them, and didn't understand his logic. They were tools. Tools were meant to be used. So he should use them. So the end result was that the two sides of his mind clashed together and he would just stare at the box unsure of what to do. He turned away from it, lest he zone out and stare at it for twenty minutes. He did that often ever since he had received the gift. Whenever he snapped out of his foggy state he would always be rendered puzzled afterwards. Sai let out a exhale to steady himself, he took one of his regular bamboo brushes and was about to dip it in some ink-.

"**SAI!! HEY SAI!! ARE YOU AWAKE?!"**

The brunette paused his actions and stood up in one smooth movement. He crossed the floorboards ignoring the distinct creaking noise they made as he walked to the window. He peered outside to see Naruto, with a smile as bright as the sun.

"Naruto? What are you doing here?"

The blond's smile never left his face.

"We gotta mission! C'mon, we need to get Sakura-chan and Kakashi!"

Sai paused. This was unexpected...the teenager in front of his house seemed so happy. Tsunade-sama wouldn't have...would she?

"What rank?"

At this question, the blond's smile grew even wider.

"A B-rank!"

Sai arched a delicate black eyebrow. Interesting. This was not what he had expected. He had thought that the godaime would keep Naruto under lock and key...but not this. Though, truth be told, he was relieved. Sai had been glad for the mild vacation. He got to work on painting, but in turn he was thinking about a certain blond too much. And lately, his fingers had been twitching at his kunai...eager to be used in battle again. Maybe, a few more difficult missions were just what he needed. He'd see Naruto as a teammate and not a...mystery that needed to be solved.

Yes, a vacation from his vacation.

* * *

Yay, so first chapter's done. 

For all of you who don't know, yes there is such thing as a sakura flower. It's a cherry blossom.

The handles on Sai's brushes are made from a very awesome stone called hematite. Don't know what it looks like? Wika or google it.

Thanks for reading, please review. constructive criticism is not only welcome, but wanted.

_"OMG!!1! this story suxorz!!my frend can typ wae betterz then u! a munky wit dislexia can typ better den u!SASUSAKU 4evah!!"_

the sentence above does not count as constructive criticism, and will be laughed at. I may also put it on my bio's 'funny quotes' page

For everyone else, I hoped you enjoyed the story. I'll update when I can.


	2. She'll Eat Her Tongue Instead

Authors Note: Hello, so I've finally updated. You may be seeing a pattern...I give everyone's point of view except Naruto's...(well and Kakashi but that'll come later) Um hmmm...originally Sakura was much different originally she didn't love Naruto, but while I was typing I realized I was forcing her to act differently and the result was that she sounded very shallow. So, I deleted the crap and retyped...I was very pleased with the end result of her P.O.V actually. Sakura is very shallow...when she was **12**. As 15 she's a very kind girl sensitive to those around her. I like her now, I just don't like her paired with Naruto or Sasuke...But I like how her monologue came out..

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. I do however own Hiro Matsumoto (Just read.)

* * *

Sakura had decided, after much pondering and thinking over the matter….that she absolutely one hundred percent **fucking hated Uchiha Sasuke. **This of course hadn't always been her feelings for the boy; this new emotional development had been discovered only recently. 

She remembered when she had been twelve, and her crush had been on Sasuke: The Dark Haired Mysterious Brooding Avenger ™. It had been easy to 'love' him. He needed someone to love him, even if it was only from the sidelines. A girl could take a hint though. Even though she had desperately flung herself at him (countless) times, he had always remained aloof (and irritated) at her immature and girlish come ons. Over time, he had valued her as a precious comrade…and nothing more. And of course Sasuke had betrayed them all, also leaving her behind. Not giving a second thought to her offer of her 'making him happy everyday and everyday will be fun'.

So, afterwards she had been distressed. To make matters worse, Naruto left for three years on his training mission. She was shocked at him when he returned. Yes, he was still the playful eager twelve year old Naruto she had grown up with…but somehow he had changed so drastically in her eyes. He was calmer, even more mature. Naruto's blond hair turned a more golden shade, his jaw had squared out. The muscles that moved under his jacket were obvious. His gravely voice had smoothed over and deepened making it into a rich sound that made her melt. One thing that had not changed (much to her delight) was his kindness. His smiles never failed to make her grin too. It was impossible for her to stay angry at him. Playfully annoyed? Yes. Maybe pissed off a bit? Sure. But unlike her younger self, she could not fly into a flurry of outrage at him anymore.

They had done missions together, hung out and talked. She found that when she gave him the chance, talking to him was easy as breathing. Though he was attractive, she didn't get nervous when he approached her. The best thing about Naruto was that he was fun to be around. And she could tell that he like her liking to be with him. To talk and train with him. There were times when they would sit under a tree watching the clouds roll by, not a single word would pass between them…and it was comfortable that way. It wasn't much longer she found herself falling for him.

She had envisioned their future together. They would be happy in their domestic lives. He would become hokage someday, meaning that he wouldn't go on as many missions. Perhaps she would remain a medic nin, but a stationary one in Konoha. Not the medic nin that went on dangerous missions. She had also imagined what their children would look like, what their personalities would be and what they would be like when they were older. One night when out dining with Sai, Naruto, and Kakashi, the utterly random thought of Naruto with bright pink hair sent her into such a fit of hysterics that even _Sai_ had looked a bit disturbed.

For a while, she thought this dream of hers would come true. Naruto was easy to please (one of the many things she loved about him) She could imagine him coming with instructions:

1.Give Ramen 3 (or much more) times daily. The more you give him the happier he'll be

2. Have him train so he can get rid of excess energy.

3. Give him lots of love and affection for a fully working (and happy) Naruto unit.

All Naruto wanted was love and affection. For a boy who had spent much of his life alone it was understandable. He wanted to be held, to have the security of arms wrapped around him. To feel nurtured, protected and above all else, wanted and needed.

But Sakura had soon realized the only arms Naruto wanted to be wrapped around him were Sasuke's.

It was a smack to the face. Somehow this hurt worse than Sasuke's rejection of her. Perhaps because Sasuke was a jerk, she could have foreseen him not wanting her. Naruto though, the boy who wanted to be loved…didn't want to be loved by _her_. It was bitterly ironic in a way. The triangle of twisted affections had changed so much. First, it had been Naruto loved Sakura who loved Sasuke who loved the idea of his brother dead. Now Sakura loved Naruto who loved Sasuke who loved nothing (and still wanted his brother dead). It was also pathetic, that the boy who had once tailed her with a longing look on _his_ face, now rejected _her_. It made her feel like shit, that Naruto would choose a cold-blooded traitorous _asshole_ over her.

Sakura suddenly felt a streak of jealously go through her. Sasuke took Naruto away from her…he had taken a lot from them. He had taken a lot from _her _too. However, he had stolen so many things from Naruto…she had trouble wrapping her mind around the fact that her best friend still craved the missing nin's love anyway.

It wasn't fair.

One thing that could be credited to Sakura, she was persistent. She'd been rejected before, but this time she wouldn't go down without a fight. She would make sure, that- somehow if she couldn't have Naruto she would at least make Sasuke's life a living hell. Sakura would sooner cut off her own tongue and eat it before she would give her best friend up to him.

* * *

Sai walked at a calm pace next to Naruto, he was a bit puzzled about something. This morning after he had left his apartment to greet Naruto…nothing happened. The blond didn't act any different around him. Sai's thought paused. _Wait…is Naruto supposed to be acting odd? Why am I assuming that he should? _Sai knew the answer though; he was still so confused by the encounter with his team mate that he expected Naruto to feel the same. 

But Naruto didn't act any different after the Painting and brush set exchange. He acted as though nothing had happened. The blond nin was currently walking a leisurely pace besides Sai with his hands resting behind his head. Sai's onyx eyes wandered over to Naruto watching him. The Chunnin must have felt his gaze, for he turned his head inquiringly at Sai.

Then Naruto smiled at him.

Sai recognized the facial expression immediately. Smile: a facial motion pertaining to (but not exclusively) Happiness, delight, amusement, sometimes pleased embarrassment, joy…the list went on and on. And as he mulled over the different reasons for that expression in his mind, Naruto continued to smile at Sai…

Then Sai felt very odd. He paused in his walking to stop. Still smiling, Naruto turned to him curiously, a few paces away from the other nin. His silent question of _'what's up?'_ hanging in the air between them.

Sai had only felt this very strange sensation in his stomach once before. It was the first time he had ever been in a true life or death situation. It was the same fluttering and simultaneous sinking feeling…but somehow, this one was different too. He rested his gloved hand on his bare stomach, as though trying to will the feeling away.

Naruto's face turned to one of concern and his hands fell down by his sides. He took a step towards the Root member. "Sai?"

Instead of the feeling dissipating after Naruto had stopped smiling, the feeling only grew worse. His hand clenched at his stomach harder.

Now Naruto looked worried. "Hey, your freaking me out now. Say something, Sai. What's wrong?"

It wasn't that Sai didn't _want_ to answer his friend….it was just that he didn't _know_ how to answer him. He didn't _know_ what was wrong, so he didn't know _what_ to say in response to Naruto's question.

The result was Sai remaining absolutely silent while he clutched at his stomach with an apathetic look upon his face and Naruto continued to fuss over him. This could have possible gone on for an hour had they not been interrupted by their fellow teammate.

"Naruto! Sai! There you two are!" Both boys looked up as Sakura walked briskly towards them. "Guys, The message you sent me told me to meet you at Ichiraku's… why're you both so late?" Another voice from behind them answered

"Well, they were helping me rescue a litter of kittens from a tree…"

Sakura snorted in a rather unladylike manner. "Right. Sure you were. So, what's this mission about?"

From the way his eyes were closed, it suggested he was grinning under his mask. "Ah, yes I just came back from Tsunade to debrief you all. But first we need to make some preparations…" Kakashi turned to Naruto.

"Turn into a girl, Naruto"

Naruto's mouth fell open a little in surprise from Kakashi's random request. "Um, you want me to do my harem-jutsu? Have you not been getting any?"

Kakashi's eye twitched a little. Sakura muffled a giggle, while Sai looked on stolidly. "No, Naruto. For this mission you need to turn into a girl. A actual girl. Not your henge justsu, if it's only an illusion a ninja may be able to see through it."

Naruto frowned at his former teacher. "Um, Kakashi…I can't just turn into a girl. An illusion of me being a girl sure, but I cannot actually change my body completely into a girl's…" Sakura entered the conversation now, "Kakashi, he's right…plus, Naruto would have to seriously study the female anatomy. The way our hips are structured are different from a man's. Then there the adding and subtracting certain…erm anatomies." She added with a slight flush. Sai gave a false smile. "You mean he needs to get rid of his penis. Well, that shouldn't be too hard…it isn't much of a dick anywa-"

Unfortunately, Sai was interrupted when Naruto punched him in the head.

* * *

Hiro Matsumoto was absolutely terrified of the young man in front of him. It took quite a lot to make Hiro even flinch so this was no matter to brush off. Hiro was a man of forty three years old. He had brown hair with a receding hair line and brushed of gray near his temples. His skin was dark and leathery from the many years he had spent in the desert. Normally, he would wear his proper desert appropriate outfit, but because he was not in his usual climate of choice he wore a simple gray man's style kimono. He looked down at his hands (away from those hell pit eyes) his gray green eyes floating to look at his worn gold wedding ring. This reminded him of his wife and son at home, if he screwed up Hiro would die, leaving his wife and eleven year old son to wonder forever of his fate. 

"Matsumoto-san"

The middle aged man's head jerked up at his name. Forcing himself to look once again into those pitch black eyes.

"The sooner you give me my source's instruction's the sooner I leave, never to call upon you again."

Hiro nodded slipping the envelope towards the adolescent male in front of him. Obsidian eyes quickly flicked over the letter, checking to make sure the seal had indeed not been broken. The man closed his eyes and stood up with out saying a word and not looking back once. Hiro couldn't help but exhale in relief.

Sasuke left the restaurant: his source's instructions in hand.

* * *

The plot thickens...not really. Constructive criticism goes nice with my chocolate muffin. Catch my hint? No? Well that's alright, I like apple muffins better anyways. 

OH SNAP. Yeah I suck, I didn't type a whole lot...I'm sorry. Oh yaz, if you wanna read some really good sasunaru wonderfulness...ness...yeah , look up Bismuth. She is teh awesome. Go read. **NOW**. (Boundaries is my personal favorite but I love 'em all)

-Happy reading.


	3. The Stranger's Eyes

Ohmigod twitch twitch I liiiiiive. (Barely) btw, I have no excuse for myself.

Disclaimer: If I owned Naruto, Sasuke and Naruto would finally admit that they are flamingly gay for each other and get married. Naruto would wear a pink tuxedo at the wedding…or a wedding dress. I would really prefer the dress though.

**IMPORTANT!!READ THIS FIRST!!**

Okay, I'm going to say this simply as possible. Naruto turns into a girl. A girl, girl . As in he's got the whooole package; vagina, uterus, ovaries, breasts, mammary glands, clitoris if it's female he's got it. He has no male organs when he turns into a girl. No prostate, dick, testicles or any other boy crap.

However this is confusing because I'm going to have Naruto refer to himself as a boy. And everyone who knows Naruto's true identity will also refer to him as male. I know this is a little bit puzzling; it kept making me do double takes while I wrote it.

Later on there is a lemon. Naruto is a **girl** but he's getting it on with a **boy. **Okay? Okay.

Right-O…on with the story. If your still a lil' bit perplexed about something ask me in your review and I'll be happy to clarify.

Genki-angel-chan

* * *

"I still don't understand why I have to be a girl."

Kakashi smiled at his former student. Naruto was pouting at him, reminding him of his since gone twelve year old self. An odd rush of warmth surged into him before he regained his 'cool teacher' composure.

"Well, I wasn't exactly being truthful. You aren't going to be the only other girl on this mission; Sakura will be joining you of course. After all, when a woman goes to a bar without friends she creates a rather, well desperate aura. This results in the men being repelled or extremely attracted. Neither of which is desired for this particular mission"

Sai looked bored. Sakura looked as though she knew this already. Naruto looked even more confused.

"Hang on, if you need a girl than why don't you use Sai? He's way girlier than I am!"

Kakashi waved a hand at Naruto, dismissing his words. "Sai doesn't know how to use you're pervy jutsu, Naruto."

Naruto glared. He used that jutsu to freak people out, not to get hit on!

Kakashi ignored the blue eyes boring into the side of his skull, instead resuming his interrupted briefing.

"All right, apparently there has been some black market smuggling involved. It's dangerous. We have an idea who is behind it…but we haven't been able to locate them. Apparently, he's been spotted regularly going into a certain bar, so we'll be going there to apprehend him. We can't just storm in there and grab him of course, it's a shady place with several dangerous people who go there regularly, which is why it's an under cover operation"

Sakura asked "why on earth is this a B mission? It doesn't seem very dangerous…"

Kakashi grinned. "That's because it isn't."

Naruto looked dubious. "It can't be an A mission…"

Kakashi's smile was showing through his mask. "it isn't an A or a B…it's a C."

All eyes turned to Naruto whose expression had become indecipherable. Then it filled with unbridled rage

"**WHAT THE HELL?! THAT OLD LADY LIED TO ME!! I CAN'T BELIVE THIS CRAP!!**

As Sakura quickly began trying to placate her irate friend, Sai turned to Kakashi;

"Excuse me, Kakashi-san? What if the person we are looking for does not happen to be at said 'shady place'?"

Kakashi smiled again "Then we will have to go look somewhere else."

* * *

Naruto was silently fuming.

Had he been twelve, the idea of being alone with Sakura in her room would have rendered the boy to a pile of blushing and giddy moosh. Now, four years later it was a familiar place to him, and the innocent anticipation of visiting the place where his 'crush' slept held no appeal to him. He felt like he was standing in a sister's room.

He had long gotten over his boyish puppy love for Sakura, she was something far more valuable to him than a potential girlfriend. He looked over at his 'sister' as she picked through her closet for suitable clothes.

He was not fuming because he was in Sakura's room.

No. He was pissed off because Tsunade had lied to him, and it was too late to not go on the mission.

If he rejected the mission after having accepted it with zeal earlier, it would put a black mark on his record as a shinobi of Konoha. Once more, his reasons of 'but she bamboozled meeeeee!!' were far too petty (not to mention ridiculously immature even if true) for any respectable ninja to be honorably excused from the mission.

Right now, he couldn't afford any hindrance when he was already aware that the entire council would crap kittens at the mere utterance of any idea that held the possibility of him becoming Hokage.

"Okay Naruto"

The blond broke himself from his thoughts. At the sight of Sakura, he couldn't help but smile.

She was so, so _pretty_.

Her lean athletic body was clad in a deep burgundy silk mini dress. It clung to her slightly hour glass figure and tantalizingly left much to the imagination. It was attached to her by two thin straps that fastened around her neck. Her hair had grown down to her shoulders, by now and she had twisted it up, a golden hairpin holding it in place. Said hairpin had a garnet teardrop hanging delicately from the end. She wore a pair of simple gold loops on her ears and nothing more.

Sakura gracefully slipped her feet into a pair of strapped heeled sandals. Her glossed pink lips curled into a smile and a charming blush graced her cheeks.

"So, do I look alright?"

It was then Naruto realized that his mouth had been slightly open. He eyed her mischievously

"No, you don't."

He allowed her to look slightly crestfallen for one second before his face split into a grin.

He shifted his weight and held one hand on his hip while he flicked his wrist down at her.

"You look faaaaabulous"

Sakura erupted into a peal of unrestrained laughter at the sight of the normally masculine Naruto in such a feminine stance. Glad that his trick worked he joined in with her.

Several minutes later Sakura still had one last bout of giggles before she was able to compose herself.

"Okay, smart ass it's time to become gender confused. You studied that anatomy book I gave you right?"

He groaned and nodded. He was happy that the clones had helped him memorize that stupid book too. Though it was very amusing when Sakura had walked into her living room to see about twenty Naruto's all huddled over a book with strict concentration on their faces. She had giggled all the way to her room.

"Right, good. Turn into a girl than I guess. And remember, not a genjutsu! You have to actually reconstruct your anatomy into that of a woman's. Think femme thoughts." She supplied playfully.

He stuck his tongue out at her before making the proper motions with his hands.

He felt the jutsu he had studied recently wash over him. It felt extremely peculiar but he didn't stop it.

Eventually the feeling ceased and he opened his eyes to look at Sakura.

Her mouth was hanging open.

"Oh shit did I- WOAH!! My voice is all weird!"

His voice had definitely softened. It had dropped a few pitches but still had a husky tone to it. Naruto flushed when he realized it sounded like he had a perpetual 'bedroom' voice.

His hand instinctively flew up over his mouth, but then paused. He looked down at his hands.

They were small, and slender. They didn't have any nicks or scraps or calluses like his usually did. Also his nails were slightly long, he frowned disapprovingly. Naruto normally kept his nails cut short as to not hinder his grip on a blade.

Sakura finally spoke "Wow Naruto, I thought you were going to look weird since you are normally so masculine and weren't using your 'sexy jutsu' and actually turned yourself into a girl but…you're actually pretty cute."

A slight wave of revulsion went through Naruto at the idea of being 'cute'.

"-- mirror?"

Naruto looked up at her; he had been distracted by his thoughts. "Sorry uh, what?"

She rolled her eyes. "I asked, 'well aren't you going to look in a mirror?'"

Naruto felt his lips shape into a pout and whined theatrically, "Do I haaaaave to?"

His friend sighed exasperated and steered him towards the mirror.

What he saw shocked him to the core.

He didn't look extremely different. His eyes and hair were both the same color…but somehow, the tan skin with the slightly raised scars on his face paired with his (slightly larger) wide blue eyes and the soft golden spikes…

He looked sort of _exotic_ when he was a girl.

And no, he wasn't breath-takingly beautiful nor was he as pretty as Sakura. But there was something…though he couldn't pinpoint what.

And yes he was indeed 'cute'. He looked like the sort of sweet tomboyish girl who would be most likely rough-housing with boys instead of going to a spa and shopping with girls.

He hadn't been sure at first, but…he was okay with this.

He grinned approvingly, this suited him well.

And even if it hadn't; it's not like he'd be like this for long, right?

* * *

Sasuke glowered at the wall as though it had just kicked a puppy.

There was an epidemic.

For the past few months, every single source that he had scheduled to meet had never shown up. Upon further investigation, Sasuke found them charred and blackened like over cooked chickens. Their skin would be stiff, and the corpses would crackle when kicked, much like the sound of twigs.(Sasuke had kicked one such corpse after a streak of frustration.)

After Hiro, Sasuke had never received any other sources of information. Once more, the source information he had received from Hiro turned out to be a complete dead end.

It felt like someone was playing with him…

He felt a growl escape him.

Sasuke Uchiha did not take kindly to those who fucked around with him.

His dead black eyes scanned the letter again; it stated that his source would be waiting for him in a bar. What irritated him though (and sent a slight thrill through him, though he would never admit it) was that this bar was in a no man's land between Konoha and another country.

He didn't want some leaf village shinobi to spot him.

_**He**__ may be there though._

The avenger shook his head, quickly disbanding those thoughts. Because…if he ever saw **him**…that **person** again…

He wasn't exactly sure what he would do.

* * *

Sakura was smiling brilliantly. If she ever got bored of being a kunoichi, she could always be a beauty consultant of some sort.

She had convinced Naruto to don a pale blue dress, the straps were a midnight blue lace and the fabric flowed loosely over his subtle curves.

The clear gloss on his naturally pink lips and deep navy eyeliner didn't hurt either.

_Yosh, that looks niiiice. _She grinned to herself.

Naruto frowned though.

"Sakura-chan, if I'm going to have to put on a genjutsu anyway to change how my face looks, I really don't see the point in this."

Sakura frowned at her friend. Truth be told…she just wanted to do it for fun. She couldn't tell him that though. He'd have a fit and start whining about 'wasting time!'

_Wasting time. _

_Pshh. _

_Whatever. _

"That isn't relevant Naruto, just use the genjutsu now."

He frowned "what should I look like?"

Sakura paused, placing her fingers to her glossed mouth in thought .

"Well….we want to stand out but not so _everyone_ notices us, so I'm just giving myself orange hair and freckles. I'm not changing my eyes. Maybe give yourself long light brown hair, keep the eyes and get rid of the kyuubi scars?"

Naruto nodded. He made the signs, and felt the genjutsu settle around him. He looked into to the mirror. He had kept his short spiky bangs, and his now light brown hair fell in soft layered spikes only an inch past his shoulders. He passed a hand wonderingly over his now smooth cheeks, confused when he couldn't feel the scars.

Weird.

A girlish squeal resounded through out the small bedroom.

"Awww! You look so cute!!" Sakura gushed throwing her hands around her friend. Much to her delight, she realized he was an inch and a half shorter than her now.

Naruto sighed "Okay, yes I get it. I'm adorable yes….ha ha yes thank you… … …you…you don't care what this is doing to my very male ego do you?"

"Not really" she replied as she continued squeezing her friend.

* * *

For once, not even Kakashi could make a smart comment.

Sai looked at Naruto and Sakura before responding;

"I didn't know you could look pretty, Sakura. And Naruto has breasts. That's interesting."

Sakura ignored him, shoving it in the back of her mind for later.

"Yes, I know. We look awesome. Try not to be distracted." She smiled

Kakashi cleared his throat and finally spoke;

"Right then, the place we're going is about four hours easy going walking pace, but seeing as how Naru**ko** and Sakura look so pretty, I'll use a mass teleportation jutsu so they won't get messed up."

Naruto twitched "What did you call me?"

"Naruko. it's cute"

Sakura quickly intervened, wary of the furious expression rapidly playing across Naruto's face.

"Um, if we're going to have code names…I'll be Sana and Naruto can be Nana okay? They're easy to remember and sort of rhyme."

Naruto calmed and seemed some what placated with this. Sakura felt a surge of sympathy for him; he clearly wasn't comfortable with this, and she was worried he would snap if Kakashi and Sai teased him too much.

* * *

Sasuke boredly twirled his glass of liquor, watching as the ice clinked against the glass and spun lazily in the water.

His source wasn't here. Clearly, someone was fucking with him. As he suspected. Dammit. He had told his subordinates to stay at a different inn, hoping that the less people there were, the less attention he would attract. Meaning whoever was screwing with him, wouldn't notice him.

Apparently he was wrong.

He hated that.

Sasuke heard a tinkling noise and tasted blood. He realized that he had been holding his glass so hard it had cracked, and had unknowingly been biting his lower lip. He licked his lip and inspected the glass; the break wasn't deep enough that it was leaking.

Good. One less thing to be pissed off about. Sasuke had a scratch on his hand and bet that the alcohol would have made it sting and the pain would only set him off.

A man sat a number of stools away from him, and ordered some liquor with a name Sasuke didn't recognize. Not surprising, seeing as how he didn't drink spirits a lot. He didn't like things that impaired his movements, mind or judgment. However, he was irritated that some one may or may not be conspiring against him and felt he needed a drink to give him that warm numbness, if only to forget for a few hours.

Forget how much his life utterly, utterly sucked ass.

Sasuke realized that he had yet to asses the man for any possibility he was a threat, and he activated his Sharingan. Under the hazy red candle light no one would notice the suddenly vibrant red hue of his eyes.

Not quite middle aged, and had a white gold wedding band. He didn't even have a genjutsu to disguise himself. In other words, he was probably just here to knock back a few before going home in a drunken stupor to his worried little wifie who was most likely wringing her hands and hoping that when he **does** come home, his loud guffaws wouldn't wake the children.

Sasuke flinched. He had been trying not to think about normal families as of late, and until that moment it had worked. Sasuke generally felt apathetic towards people, but these days found himself making up stories about complete strangers.

Sasuke wasn't sure if he should be concerned with his latest people watching habit or not.

* * *

Naruto, Sakura , Kakashi and Sai stood in a small group a ways from the bar. The bar itself was nothing special. It was actually more like a tavern with an inn on the second floor. It was made mostly of wood, and had several paper lanterns exuding red light. In red paint above the door way read: "THE RED HAZE"

Kakashi turned to the two girls in front of him. "Alright, we actually need only one of you to attach herself onto the dealer, but having two is better than one. I want you to escort him to the farthest right room in the inn, giving the impression you are going to sleep with him. When you get to the room I want you the open room's window to show us you have the situation is under control and we can go in to capture him. I have no doubt you shouldn't have that much trouble apprehending him, he is an average shinobi at best.

Naruto frowned "Err, I don't know much about this kinda stuff, but uh shouldn't he have body guards or something?"

Kakashi shrugged. "Well I suppose he likes to pick up girls with out his guards around. Who knows?"

Naruto nodded. Good enough for him.

* * *

Sanamaru Misahi looked up when he heard the barman greet the new guests. His eyes lit up immediately. Two young women entered the bar, one was strikingly beautiful with red hair and vivid green eyes as well as a bit of a voluptuous figure, the other one seemed more childish in a way because her figure was less defined and more willowy but wasn't hard on the eyes either.

He had always been considered a charismatic man, and when he saw the red head turn to him, and gorgeous smile slowly bloom over her face…well that was it. He decided to charm her right back. He smiled back in his 'most open care-to-join-me?' way. She giggled and quickly turned towards the smaller brunette with blue eyes. She whispered something in her ear. The petite one shifted her eyes to look at Sanamaru then back to the red head with a smile.

A "go and get him" grin.

Soto felt a swift wave of pride. He had been concerned, he was thirty five and though he could be considered handsome in an average way, he was glad he had the girl's friend's approval.

_May make things go a bit smoother later on._

The petite one walked away from the red head, and walked past him, winking at him as she did. She sat about five stools away from him, next to a young blond man. Probably so she could flirt and keep an eye on her friend's progress too.

The red head looked at him and walked over, swaying her hips in a show of casual sexiness. All thoughts of his trophy wife at home went out the window.

_Oh, that's niiiice_.

She sat down at the stool next to him;

"I'm Sana" She said in a musical voice. There was a slight breathy sound to it.

He smiled. "I'm Sanamaru"

She laughed "What a coincidence, we have such similar names!" He laughed too.

_Wife? What wife? Kids? What kids?_

* * *

Naruto nearly gagged when he saw the look the man gave Sakura.

_Fuck, she isn't actually going to have to touch him is she?!_

Sakura smiled at him than turned to Naruto to whisper in his ear.

"I'll take care of him, this should be really easy. When Kakashi and Sai capture him, on of us will get you later."

Naruto looked at the man. Sure he was good looking, but there was something about the man that made his skin crawl.

He smirked back at Sakura encouragingly; too bad he wouldn't be there to see the slimy bastard beaten to a pulp.

As he walked past the man, he casually winked at him, letting the sleaze think he was gonna get some tonight.

Naruto sat down several barstools away from them, and ordered some fruity sweet alcohol ridden drink. That's what girls drank at bars right? Sweet, artificially colored concoctions with names like Sea breeze or Mostly Sunny, which hardly even tastes like alcohol until you've had five and can actually feel the drinks poisoning your body.

He sipped it carefully. He'd only ever had sake, but that was for celebrations only.

_Hmm, not bad actually. Damn that's sweet, but goooood._

"You've never had alcohol have you?"

Naruto turned to his left, a young man with sandy blond hair and hazel eyes was staring at him curiously. Naruto grinned, giving the man his most disarming smile.

_Imachick, Imagirl, Imaprettygrrrrl, Imahotlady, stay in character moron._

"Oh, what makes you say that? I have." Which was true. He had sake before.

The man shook his head. "No, real drinks. Not that fruity crap."

Naruto maintained his smile, then a mock look of surprise.

"Real drinks? I didn't realize this was fake!"

The flaxen blond rolled his eyes, and then ordered two of something from the bartender.

A few seconds later, a glass filled with water colored liquid sat in front of him.

"I'll admit that I'm not a hard drinker or anything, but I just discovered this one and it's pretty good. Don't drink it too quickly though. It'll make you dizzy." After his said this he lifted the drink to his lips and drank slowly, than sighed.

Naruto stared dubiously at his own glass, mentally shrugged and drank some too.

_Whoa, it fells like a fire is inside me…but in a good way._

He grinned.

"Yeah, it is pretty good. I like it."

That was how the rest of the evening went. The young man introduced him to several different drinks. He was easy to talk to, Naruto realized. And when they weren't talking the silence wasn't awkward. It was comfortable. He barely registered when Sakura walked past him, arm in arm with Sanamaru. He didn't see the raised eyebrow, or the sly grin she gave him.

He was too busy laughing at a story the man was telling him. About how when he was a kid he accidentally set an entire field on fire, and how he had been trying to put it out with his squirt gun. In turn, Naruto revealed what a prankster he had been when he was a kid. The alcohol made him forget how he was supposed to be a dainty, young lady. The two were soon laughing at the most stupid crap, like they were old friends and Naruto found himself having more fun than he'd had in **years**.

* * *

She crossed her legs, causing her hem line to rise up and give him an excellent view of her milky white thigh. She smiled suggestively at him.

"I don't like to beat around the bush Sanamaru-saaaan. My house is a bit far also, my asshole boyfriend is there right now…and judging from the wedding band on your finger, your house isn't the best place for a rendezvous either. What say you to us meeting upstairs?"

Sanamaru felt his throat constricting, while she had been talking, Sana had been running one hand along her thigh and the other was stroking her neck.

He raised an eyebrow, and made sure his voice wouldn't crack before he spoke;

"Did you have a specific room in mind?"

Her lips curved into a rather sultry smile.

"Actually, I already have a room reserved. Shall we?"

Sakura had been observing Naruto for the past hour and a half. And what she saw definitely pleased her. She was frustrated he had absolutely no love life, and seeing him having so much fun with the blond stranger made her happy. Okay, yeah, the guy was probably straight…but if Naruto had a one night stand, and had a good memory from it, maybe he would decide to start pursuing potential lovers? She hoped so. She was tired of Naruto sulking over Sasuke. No, he didn't look like he was sulking, but she could tell. He needs to get over that asshole. Like, **yesterday**.

She turned her attention away from the two men, and gave Sanamaru a brilliant smile.

They walked up the stairs, and she led him right. There were seven rooms altogether, and she led him to the right, farthest one. As she opened the door, he slipped his arms around her waist and kissed her neck. She let out a fake moan to distract him, and pulled them inside the room, simultaneously closing and locking the door.

The stumbled across the room, until they were against the wall where the window was.

She smiled. "Mind if I open the window? It's hot in here" He smirked back. "Not at all."

Almost immediately after she opened the window, Kakashi followed by Sai leaped through it. Kakashi threw a wire attached to a shuriken at Sanamaru, maneuvering it to wrap around him. Sai kicked him in the back of the knees, making him fall forward. Sakura placed one heeled foot on his back, keeping him in place. All while this was going on, Sanamaru had been shouting various explicit statements that were ignored by the leaf ninja who apprehended him.

Sakura shut him up with a swift kick to the head.

"Sanamaru Misahi, you are under arrest under penalty of black market dealings. We will 'escort' you to Konoha where you will be dealt with accordingly."

The three shinobi didn't notice that Sakura's kick had actually knocked the man unconscious.

The silver haired nin turned to Sai. "Sai why don't you fetch Naruto?"

"Actually sensei, I don't think that's a good idea."

The two men looked at her surprised. (well as surprised as Sai can look)

"Why?" They asked her in unison

She sighed. "Naruto's flirting with this hot guy, okay? Let him have a little fun. God knows he needs some lovin'…maybe it'll take his mind off of all this Sasuke crap, if only for one night."

Kakashi thought a moment. "Well, I suppose Naruto can take care of himself. We can haul this guy in, and come back in the morning."

Sakura frowned. "Oh yes, and while we're at it, we can walk into the room they're sleeping in and chat about the weather and town's gossip."

"Well, I suppose we can do that too."

She huffed, irritated. "Look, can we just take this guy back already? These heels are killing me!"

* * *

Naruto didn't quite understand what was happening. He understood that he and the man were stumbling through the farthest left door in the inn. He understood that he had waaaay too much to drink, and that's why he had a severe lack of inhibition. What he didn't understand is why even though he understood all that crap why he was allowing some stranger to touch his body the way he so intimately was.

He shuddered, when the man's hand glided over his breast, the other wrapping around his waist and pulling them closer together. He understood though, even if he claimed not to. It was the closeness of it. He'd never been intimate with anyone, and found it felt nice.

_So fucking nice._

The blond continuously kissed Naruto gently on the neck. Every now and then he'd bite him only to lick and kiss the tiny hurt away. The stranger's lips hovered over naruto's.

"This okay?"

Naruto was confused, he didn't remember the man asking if he could fondle his breast or kiss his neck. Weird. Then he remembered Sakura mentioning how kisses on the mouth were supposed to be personal. He didn't really give a crap about that. After tonight he'd never see this man again so it didn't matter.

He nodded his consent, and the man kissed him hard, then soft. His hands roamed up and down the young ninja's body, and Naruto emitted a breathy sigh.

He bumped against something, and realized it was the bed. The stranger maneuvered them so they slid on the bed, and didn't fall on it. The man placed his arms on either side of Naruto's face and kissed him languidly, Naruto moaned softly.

_Feels so good. Please don't end soon…I don't know when I'll get this again._

He looked in the stranger's face, soft hazel eyes looked down on him.

"You alright?"

Naruto nodded as he leaned up and kissed the man on the lips, tracing his jaw line, across his ear and down his neck with his lips, sighing as the man slipped the midnight blue dress off of him. He wrapped his arms around the blond's neck, inhaling the scent that smelled like forest and rain. The man caressed Naruto's body slowly, as though they had all the time in the world. Naruto didn't care, he wished it would last.

In the back of his mind, Naruto registered that he was being very feminine…he supposed any other time he would have gotten angry about it, but not this time. Not now.

He shivered as the stranger slipped his fingers under the lace straps of his panties and pulled them off in one fluid motion. He stroked Naruto's thighs, and when he slipped his hand in between them, they both moaned at the same time.

Naruto hadn't figured his present body to be so…sensitive or responsive. It was embarrassing actually. He had figured that because it wasn't his usual male body, he wouldn't be able to feel things like this.

He petted his hands against the strangers face, letting go to allow the him to take off his clothes. The man noticed Naruto shiver, and pulled the blankets over them.

"Do you want to keep going?"

In answer, Naruto kissed the man's chest and rolled his hips against the stranger's, eliciting a low moan from him. The blond man un-hooked Naruto's blue strapless bra and dropped it on the floor along with their other clothes.

He lay back down next to Naruto, and slipped his hand between his legs, between the soft folds that lay there. He rubbed his middle finger against Naruto's clit experimentally.

He gasped at the sudden feeling, and entangled his hands into the stranger's hair.

Naruto closed his eyes in pleasure; he felt lips descend on his collar bone trailing up to his neck.

The blond put Naruto's legs on either side of his hips and with a twin moans from the both of them, slid inside of him.

Naruto was a teenage boy. And like most teenage boys, he had 'experimented' with his own body, but a person touching you…touching you in the most intimate ways was so much more different then doing it by yourself. Masturbation had nothing on someone kissing and biting their way up and down your body, or rubbing that ecstasy spot that you didn't even realize you had until they discovered it.

The first thrusts made Naruto wince. Apparently, the female in the anatomy book he had studied so carefully had been a virgin, thus turning himself into a virgin female as well.

The man kissed him softly, almost apologetically. He must not have known of his one night lover's inexperience. He slipped his hands into Naruto's and interlaced their fingers.

Naruto moaned softly and arched into the man when he thrust into a certain spot, encouraging the blond stranger to move more.

They started a rhythm; they arched and writhed against each other in a sensual dance, moaning, gasping, and kissing…Until with shudders from both of them, climaxed.

"Sasu….ke…." Naruto almost inaudibly whispered. He didn't notice the curious glance from the stranger.

Naruto was too exhausted to also notice the genjutsu had worn off of him when he had his orgasm. He didn't notice his hair was no longer chestnut brown but once more to it's golden blond color, and now rested in slightly damp spikes-framing his face.

Had he not fallen asleep in an afterglow slumber, he would have noticed the color of his partner's hair had changed as well. It had turned from sandy blond to the deep shade of raven's feathers. The hazel eyes were also long gone.

Instead, a pair of onyx colored eyes looked down on Naruto, a puzzled expression on the owner's face.

* * *

I had fun writing this…Wow! 15 ½ pages Holy crap!!

Like it? Hate it? Tell me watcha think?

I would like to take a moment to say: yes, I do think Sakura is really pretty and I actually like her character…though I fear I may have made her (and Naruto, and Sai, and Kakashi) a bit ooc. Oops. Well, yeah…I'm not Kishimoto, so technically I really can't have them in character like he intended.

God, did I have enough freaking page breaks or what. Jeebuz.

Oh and the story about accidentally setting a field on fire? Yeah, that happened to my daddy when he was a kid. He and his friend kept running to a stream with tiny cups, they'd fill the cups up to try and put the fire out but it got worse and worse each time.

The field was all dead grass, so it just burned away, no one got hurt so that was nice. Apparently my dad and his friend got in major trouble though. Not surprised, I'd be pissed (though slightly amused) If my kid was a pyromaniac.


	4. Morning After

I gotta admit, I was stunned stupid when I woke up in the morning and found like 10 reviews. I was shocked; I thought people would have given up on me by now.

ahem IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT: Naruto is not going to stay a girl forever. The reason I made Naruto a girl when he's pregnant is because well, men can't have babies. Don't get me wrong, I have read (and enjoyed) TONS of fanfics where Naruto is a male and is preggers…and maybe someday I'll do a story like that, but I wanted to take a more realistic approach to **this** one. That's all. (yeah, cause boys turning into girls is soooo realistic XD)

The only exception I've seen for this is a man who had once been a woman (he's married to another woman) his wife couldn't get pregnant, so she asked him to get pregnant for her. He agreed, so now he's 6 months preggy with their baby girl. Don't believe me? I read it in People's Magazine. Hurray. Unfortunately for women who used to be men, they can't get preggy though because they don't have a uterus. Or ovaries.

So, yeah, Naruto will eventually turn back into a male and I'll write an awesome smex scene for all those die hard raw yaoi fans. I'll make your patience worth it, 'kay? ;D

But, that won't happen for a while. Sorry. M-preg is already unrealistic…men don't have uteruses up their anus. They don't. Though, I would be very interesting if they did. :D

I'm sure you're all tired of my rambling, so I'll just shut up and type now

Disclaimer: I **WISH** I owned Naruto.

* * *

Sasuke had never seen this woman before in his life. Just seconds ago though, she had clearly murmured his name while she was sleeping. He thought back to the conversations he had with her.

_No, I never gave her my name…I didn't even give her a false name. So how does she know me? I'm pretty sure she didn't see me earlier, before I used the genjutsu. _

She was spooned against him right now; her breathing was even-indicating she had fallen asleep. Sasuke ran his hand down her arm and then rubbed her palm. She sighed and moved closer to him.

He frowned; her hands were soft, far too soft for even a low rank kunoichi whose hands would have calluses from griping kunai.

Yet, she had a genjutsu on her earlier. Only ninjas used genjutsu.

He turned slightly to the bed table on his side of the bed. He turned the oil lamp on with a spark, and turned the knob to make the light brighter. Sasuke turned back to the girl and leaned over her, his elbow resting on the other side of her.

_Blond hair...what color eyes did she have?_ Sasuke closed his eyes and concentrated, briefly, while the genjutsu was being dispelled her eyes had looked into his.

_Blue…they were blue._

Blonde hair and blue eyes while not exactly rare were uncommon. The only kunoichi he was familiar with who had blue eyes and blond hair was Ino Yamanaka. He hadn't seen that girl since he was thirteen before he left Konoha. This girl next to him was definitely not her. Ino's eyes had a slight turquoise hue to them and lacked pupils. Also, her hair was a bit paler than this girl's.

He inspected her closer, as if he looked hard enough he would recognize who this girl was.

Sasuke froze.

When Sasuke had shifted, the light from behind him had moved higher onto the girl's face. The light caught something.

Shaking, his hand ran over the girl's cheek. His sensitive fingertips felt the three horizontal scars on her face.

_No. that's impossible._

He pulled her shoulder a bit, and she easily rolled over towards him, her left arm slid over his waist and rested there. She mumbled something he didn't catch; he was too busy staring at her.

_The same scars are on the other side… what the fuck?!_

There was no doubting who the marks reminded Sasuke of. Only two conclusions came to Sasuke's mind.

Either a) Some chick was stalking Naruto to the point she styled her hair like his, and cut six horizontal scars on her face. This seemed highly unlikely.

And there was the just as insane hypothesis that b) Naruto did something to make himself a girl. Remembering Naruto from how he acted, the blond teenager was fairly masculine and Sasuke didn't think Naruto would turn into a girl on a whim. It must have been for a mission. Still…it seemed so ridiculously improbable…

The young Uchiha then remembered something from when he was still serving Konoha. Whenever they were camping out on some mission, Sasuke and Naruto would have to share a tent, Sakura would have her own, and Kakashi would sleep outside.

Sasuke recalled that Naruto would talk in his sleep sometimes, and even answered questions if he was out of it enough.

Sasuke lowered himself so he was laying down next to Naruto_(?)_. He_(she?)_ moved closer to him so her head was resting under his chin. Sasuke inhaled.

_Hmm…under that perfume she smells like Naruto. That musky scent along with the smell of trees and earth._

"Naruto?" Sasuke asked.

"Hmm?" he answered groggily.

"Uzumaki Naruto?" he pressed.

"Thash m'name"

Sasuke felt his heart accelerate. Why? Why was his chest pounding so hard?

"Why are you a girl?"

"Stoopid… …misshun"

"What?"

"Stoopid…misshun"

Sasuke sighed; he supposed he wasn't going to get much more out of him than that.

With a force of a hammer hitting him on the head, Sasuke realized what exactly he had done. He had slept with Naruto. He had sexual intercourse…with Naruto. Also, he remembered them both enjoying it thoroughly. It was brutally ironic in a way. His first and only kiss had been with the moron…and now he had lost his virginity to him as well.

The person who would keep coming back for him, no matter if Sasuke threatened him on pain of death.

…_How annoying…how…touching?_ Sasuke internally winced when he thought the last word. He was not supposed to think those things.

Sasuke realized he had a choice. Naruto didn't realize that his best friend and the person who had tried to kill him more than once was laying right next to him.

Sasuke loved Naruto. Sasuke hated Naruto. Their relationship was too complicated…far too complicated.

Several years ago, Sasuke had been reading a book and stumbled on a quote.

"_You know that when I hate you, it is because I love you to a point of passion that unhinges my soul."_

Sasuke could not remember what book he had read that in, or who the author was. He only remembered how well it defined their relationship.

He hesitantly brought his hand to the blond's head, and ran it through the soft spikes. He couldn't recall ever touching Naruto like this. Now that he thought about it, he had never really touched him before. Sure, they had traded punches as children, even extended a hand to one another to help the other up, but never had he _touched_ Naruto.

Sasuke realized with a shudder he was enjoying this. The closeness, the fact that Naruto was allowing him to, and was also enjoying it as proven by a soft sigh he emitted. His warm breath was gently blowing against Sasuke's neck, and the brunette felt his lips descend on the top of the blond's head without meaning to.

Sasuke wanted to punch and beat himself for doing what he was doing. To scream at himself just how wrong this was. How he should have just left the bar when he realized that his source wasn't coming. How he should have left the instant the disguised Naruto had walked into the bar. Or, when he was done sleeping with her, he should have just left, not looking at her to see her appearance had changed. Or, when he had figured out her real identity to take a sword to her throat. The other side of him though was rejoicing at his good fortune, to stumble upon the actual person he obsessed over daily. And not the kind of obsession he had over Itachi.

_Ambivalent._

Sasuke's eyes widened in surprise. It was a word...no more than that. However, it somehow seemed to some up Sasuke's thoughts and feelings on the situation entirely

**Ambivalent: (noun) Uncertainty or fluctuation, esp when caused by inability to make a choice or by simultaneous desire to say or do two opposite things**. **Also, the coexistance within an individual of positive and negative feelings toward the same person simultaneously drawing him or her in opposite directions.**

_Funny_, Sasuke thought. _This word is by gods the near definition of me. _He looked down at the blond sleeping on his bed quietly. On the one hand, he was tempted to take the teenager with him, to have him as his own. On the other, a part of him screamed to take his sword and slice it through the soft flesh of his best friend. By doing that he would eliminate the boy that always seemed to be chasing and hunting for him; creating a burden Sasuke longed to be rid of.

Sasuke wasn't entirely sure of what he wanted to do. So…he decided to put his thoughts on hold until he got rid of the pounding pain in his head, and gathered his wits about him a bit better.

He pulled away from Naruto (who emitted a groan at the absence of warmth) pulled the cord of off his neck. Attached to the cord was a ring that was a dull silver color. Stamped on top the ring was the Uchiha seal. Sasuke would have rather not used his father's signet ring, but this was short notice.

He performed a jutsu binding spell to the ring, and than another he had only acquired recently. He smiled as he slipped on the left ring finger of Naruto's hand. It was far to big for his slender female finger, but the band started to get warm and gradually shrunk down until it fit snugly.

Sasuke smirked. This was so easy, if he'd been a weaker person he'd have felt guilty.

Sasuke was about to get out of bed, but paused. He turned to look down at Naruto; his female face was relaxed to a look of sleeping contentment. He leaned forward and kissed him on the neck, and sucked until he was sure a dark bruise would form. He smiled in a slightly malicious manner _have fun explaining that_.

The brunette got off of the bed and slipped his clothing on. He walked downstairs and paid for the room and their drinks, then promptly left.

* * *

_Awmigaaawd…the fuck? Oooh man my head hurts so fucking bad right now._

Naruto sat up in bed and looked all around him._ Uh…No. This isn't my apartment. This definitely isn't my bed._ Naruto looked down.

"… … … shit." He absently poked one of his breasts. _Yep, still there._

He rolled out of bed, cussing as he tripped over his clothes. He had slipped the dress over his head when he noticed how _heavy_ his hand felt.

Naruto looked down at his slender hand with confusion. It was a ring. _What the fuck? _The only jewelry he only ever wore (or owned) was the necklace he got from Tsunade. Upon further inspection, Naruto felt his breath hitch.

Carved into the metal on the top of the ring was a fan. An uchiwa fan. Naruto mind flickered straight to the clan symbol of Sasuke's family. It was an uchiwa fan just like the one on the ring.

… … _No…No…fucking…way. That's, that's not possible… it's just my hangover!! Why the hell would he even__** be**__ here?! No, just-just __**no**__!! When did he-? How-? Oh God…that guy I slept with…that was-? B-but it couldn't be-_

Naruto groaned and flopped back onto the bed, his head was still pounding hard. He rubbed his palms into his eyes, trying to make the pressure in his head go away.

He felt a slight raw pain in between his legs, his head was aching harder than it ever had, and he'd just realized he (most likely) had just slept with his best friend who (once again) left him behind with out a word. It was sadistically nostalgic; the ache in his heart worsened and felt the same forlorn abandoned emotion wash through him.

It took a moment for Naruto to realize the stinging behind his eyes and the water on his face was tears.

* * *

Ho-kay… Uh…I don't know how realistic the whole 'morning after' thing is. I mean, I've never slept with anyone before, I've never gotten drunk, and I've never gotten drunk and then ended up having a one night stand with someone. (I'm an über virgin) So, if you have and know what it's like and it's nothing like what I've described. Um…oops, I guess.

Poor poor Naruto, I do hope I'm not making him ooc. Though, I'm a fairly cheerful person and if I was in his shoes I'd probably be crying too. So, yosh. Sorry this wasn't as long but I'm currently working on another sasunaru fic right now.

And uh, for those of you who don't know, an 'uchiwa' is a type of fan that doesn't fold. It basically looks exactly like the Uchiha clan symbol. And the clan name 'Uchiha' is in fact a play on the word 'uchiwa' which is why they have that fan as their clan symbol. Yes, that clever Kishimoto does enjoy using puns. Cute.


	5. Dislocated Heart

Uh…can you say 'Holy shit'? In one day I got so many add favs and watchers and reviews…Thanks, I'm glad you enjoy the story. I'm trying to make sure it's well written.

Oh, by the way. Someone asked me if the left ring finger is for marriage or engagement, the answer is both. A woman will wear her engagement ring, and when she gets married will also wear the wedding band. Though some married woman put away their engagement ring and only wear the wedding band. Right ring fingers are traditionally used for class rings.

Warnings: Um, pathetic attempts at humor? :O

Disclaimer: Don't own Naruto.

* * *

Naruto didn't feel like he was completely awake. He walked all the way to Konoha without even realizing it. He walked to his apartment in a daze. He locked his door, took off his clothes and flopped down onto his bed. He sighed. It was good to be back home. Something gleamed in front of his unfocused yes. He looked at his hand and saw the ring adorning his finger.

"… … … … …**AHHHHHHGGHHHHH!!" **

Naruto sat up in his bed so fast; he felt his vision swim as the blood rushed from his head. The dizziness only made him angrier. In a rigid motion, Naruto clamped the fingers around the ring and pulled with all his fury.

_Pop._

Naruto heard the strange noise, like a cork from a bottle. Then the pain came.

"Owww!" He looked down, and his eyes widened when he saw his third finger dangling limply.

He had dislocated his finger.

_Sonofamotherfuckingbitchofawhore_

Naruto lied back down on his bed, and curled up into a ball. He put part of the blanket in between his teeth. The blond cradled the injured hand, and once again grabbed his ring finger. He closed his eyes as hard as he could, than pulled and shoved on the finger.

"ERRRRGGGGHHHHH!!"

Naruto released the blanket from his mouth, a dry cottony feeling remained. He looked down at his finger which was throbbing. The ring was still on there tightly.

Mocking him.

He glared down at it angrily, than sprung out of bed. He stomped down the short hallway into the kitchen and to the counter where he found what he was looking for. Naruto tore the top off of the butter and smeared some around his finger, then proceeded to try and (gently) pry it off. He could twist it around his finger, but couldn't slip it off.

Naruto frowned, so the butter obviously hadn't worked. He washed his hands as he tried to figure out something else. _Oh! Duh, heat! Heat makes metal expand!_ Naruto remembered many a stubborn jar that had been rendered easy to open with applying hot water to the lid. But, he couldn't put hot water on the ring without burning himself. And he couldn't use a match that would just melt the stupid thing and would burn him even worse than hot water would. So that idea was out.

Naruto perked up when he remembered his ace up his sleeve. Naruto ran back into his room and dove under his bed.

For his sixteenth birthday, Kiba (as a joke) had given him some personal lubricant and (to his deep embarrassment) a pair of handcuffs. Naruto had kept both in the box they'd come in and shoved them under his bed, never to see the light of day again.

Naruto supposed that anyone else would have just thrown the offending objects away but a gift was a gift and Naruto didn't get many of those.

He cried triumphantly and pulled the box out, nearly tearing the lid off in excitement. Naruto ignored the handcuffs but screwed off the cap on the oil based lubricant.

He spread it generously onto his finger, disregarding the warm sensation it gave off. Naruto twisted the ring around, and tried slipping it off but to no avail. The blond screwed the cap back on and threw it back in the box with disgust.

Well, at least he wasn't tired anymore.

* * *

Sakura couldn't believe her eyes.

"Naruto, why are you still a girl?"

He only sighed. In his rush to leave the apartment to check on Sakura to make sure everything had gone well, he had some how forgotten he was still a woman.

"I don't have the scroll. You didn't give it to me."

She laughed sheepishly.

"Oh, I didn't did I? I gave it back to Tsunade though; you'll have to go see her to get it."

Naruto thanked her and as he turned to leave she put her hand on his arm to stop him. He looked at Sakura with question.

She smiled slyly, "when you get back I want details on that hot guy I saw with you last night."

Naruto paled, than blushed. Sakura inwardly smiled at how cute his girl form looked flustered.

"Uhm, Uh sure." He mumbled awkwardly.

* * *

Tsunade rested her chin on her hands. She frowned at the girl in front of her. She sighed, the girl look like she was about to cry from sheer frustration.

"Naruto, we've tried the jutsu three different times now. If you haven't turned back into a male by now, well I'm starting to doubt you will."

She could tell from his expression that this was not what he had wanted her to tell him.

"You can't be serious…Why the crap wouldn't I have turned back?!"

Tsunade opened the scroll on her desk for the forth time and reread it once again.

"It says here, that the user of this jutsu can only be restored to their original form if their body is free of all and any obstructions and or seals to their chakra."

Naruto fumed. "I don't have any seals on me…or obstructions though."

Tsunade shrugged. Naruto glared at her.

"This wouldn't have happened if you hadn't **lied** to me you know. If you had just given me a regular B mission and not this weird ass C mission I wouldn't have turned into a girl and I wouldn't…"

_Have slept with Sasuke!!_

"…Be stuck like this. It's **your** fault. **You** fix it, Tsunade."

Tsunade winced, Naruto only called her by her actual name when he was pissed off as hell at her. This wasn't often.

Shit. He was really angry at her. And truth be told, yes she shouldn't have lied to him. And it wasn't a very urgent mission that needed her immediate attention, she could have waited until one of the other kunoichi like Ino, Tenten or Hinata weren't busy. But she'd wanted it out of the way.

"Ho'kay brat. Look, take the next few weeks off okay? I'll talk to some other medics I know about this."

Naruto frowned. "Old Lady, if you're the best medic nin in the world and can't do anything about my issue than it's safe to say I'm pretty damn screwed."

Tsunade felt flattered at his comment and then relived he wasn't mad at her anymore. "Naruto, sometimes it takes a fresh pair of eyes. You just relax…I'll work on this okay?"

Naruto sighed but nodded. He hated **waiting**.

* * *

It was some odd four and a half weeks later that Naruto began to feel a bit weird.

Every morning he'd get severely nauseous, throw up, and then wouldn't be able to eat anything. Also, he'd been much more irritable lately. It didn't help that every morning he woke up, the first thing he would see is the ring on his hand and would get upset all over again. He tended to snap; just yesterday Konohamaru had bumped into him. Normally he'd just laugh it off or noogie his head, but that day Naruto had glared at him and told him to watch where he was going.

Naruto shook his head. That, on top of the fact he just felt plain wrong. Naruto was naturally energetic and hyper. For the past couple of weeks he'd been feeling absolutely exhausted.

He sat up in bed, looking out the window across from him for a moment. It was a clear beautiful day; a couple clouds were lackadaisically floating by. Naruto sighed.

A familiar curdling rose in his stomach, and fast as flash leapt out of bed and paid tribute to the porcelain bowl in his bathroom.

* * *

Hinat was brushing her hair when a maid knocked on her bedroom door.

"Come in"

Kanako, her private maid entered. The woman was about twenty six years old, and she kept her thick black hair in a simple low bun. The woman had a mixed expression of puzzlement and curiosity.

" Hinata-sama, there's a young blond haired woman here to see you. I had her wait in the foyer."

_Blond haired woman? Tsunade-sama? Ino perhaps? Yes, Ino seemes more likely._

Hinata smiled graciously "Thank you Suname-san" Said woman bowed respectfully then exited the room quietly.

Hinata washed her face, than put on her usual lavender and white jacket. Hinata walked to the foyer where the person she least expected to be was standing there.

Hinata for one moment got confused at the blond girl in front of her before recognizing the black and orange outfit and the vivid blue eyes as well as the kyuubi scars.

Naruto, when he had realized it may be a while before he had changed back had explained the situation to his friends. Hinata had been worried about Naruto, but he had treated his temporary gender bending as something of a mild inconvenience, not something to be overly concerned about.

Hinat smiled shyly at Naruto.

Naruto weakly smiled back at her, Hinata realized something must be wrong. He was so…quiet!

"Hey there Hinata-chan…I have a couple questions for you."

She smiled at him "Of course. Let's go to my room."

She led him back to her room, the walls were painted a modest off white and the floor was a rich wood. There was a small couch and a night stand with a mirror and aside from the bed that was the only furniture in the spacious room. Hinata sat delicately on a deep violet couch, and Naruto flopped down next to her.

She patted his shoulder. "So, what do you want to know?"

Naruto was looking at the floor, and for a long moment he said nothing. She waited patiently, he normally didn't brood but she tried not to be too anxious.

"I feel wrong…I have a suspicion," for some reason unbeknownst to Hinata he looked at his hand. "But I'm not completely sure. Could you please use the Byakugan on me to see what's wrong with me?"

He looked up at her; he looked so delicate and vulnerable, Hinata felt a sudden instinctual urge to protect surge through her. She patted his hand encouragingly.

"O-of course Naruto! Just sit up straight," She saw him beginning to lift up the hem of his shirt. "Oh! You don't have to take your shirt off."

He nodded and let his hands fall on his lap uselessly.

Hinata activated her Byakugan, the veins strained in the skin around her pearl lavender eyes. The young woman focused her eyes on Naruto's interior chakra system.

"Nothing seems out of the ordinary, well you have two chakras as per usual…" She heard Naruto exhale deeply with relief.

Hinata watched as the blue and red chakra twirled together elaborately throughout his complex system. It was always something she marveled at, the inner workings of the body's energy, so complex and similar to the circulatory system.

Suddenly something flicked and she frowned to herself. _Wait, that's not right_. She watched as other flickers of silver white chakra appeared to be threading to the other blue strands. They were so thin she didn't notice them at first. Hinata realized that the silver strands were only connected to the chakra that veined through his torso and abdominal region.

She followed them back to their source; a small shining ball of white chakra in center between Naruto's lower hips. In the pelvic region.

She gasped. Naruto asked uneasily, "What is it Hinata? What's wrong?"

She shook her head. "Uhm n-nothing" But_ that isn't right, that specific chakra should only appear in women_. She paused in her musings _Wait…perhaps not in mind, but Naruto's __**body**__ is female right now…so…Ah! B-but t-that means he must have had s-s-s-sexual…um r-relations w-with s-someone…_

Double then triple checking to makes sure she hadn't made an error, she deactivated her byakugan. Hinata nervously ran a hand through her long black hair.

"N-Naruto? Uhm, I have to ask you a few questions…"

Naruto leaned back into the comfortable couch. "Yeah, shoot."

Her face turned beet red, she looked down a bit and started fidgeting with her fingers.

Naruto laughed, "Please Hinata, I'm dying from curiosity now, what is it?"

She only blushed harder; finally she managed to splutter out:

"Haveyoubeenhavingsex?"

Naruto cocked an eyebrow. "I'm sorry? I didn't catch that."

She calmed herself down.  
On an awkward scale of one to ten this was about…jello.  
Imagine telling your crush (who has been turned girl) that he is pregnant.

Good times, good times.

Come on! She would be a doctor someday! She couldn't allow herself to get embarrassed over a simple pregnancy diagnosis. She cleared her throat, and looked at Naruto in her most professional, clinically detached face she could possible muster.

"Naruto-kun, you're pregnant."

Naruto's blue eyes widened comically…before he burst into uncontrollable peals of laughter.

He actually **fell** off of the couch.

Hinata sighed, well how on earth did she expect him to act? She crossed her legs and tolerantly waited until she could explain things more in depth to him.

He was banging his fist on the floor, laughing so hard his sides were beginning to hurt and tears were streaming down his face.

Finally, after about five minutes Naruto managed to crawl back on the couch. A last few remaining giggles escaping him.

"Oh Gods, that was good." He straightened up on the couch and looked at Hinata with a lazy smile "Okay, no really though what's wrong?"

Hinata sighed for what seemed like the eighth time. "Naruto…I'm serious. Inside of you, there are three chakras. Yours is blue and it stems from here" She pointed to his heart. The Kyuubi's is red, and it is locked in the seal right here" She pointed to his navel. "And the third one is your, um baby's chakra. It's white and it's located here." She touched a few inches lower than his navel.  
"Yours is from your heart, Kyuubi's is in the seal in your naval, and the baby is of course in your womb. The…the evidence is t-there Naruto-kun…it's black and white"

Naruto's normally healthy sunkissed skin had turned a sickly pallor.

"Hinata…please **please** tell me this is some sort of joke…or something."

The look of hopelessness in his azure eyes tugged at her heart violently. She leaned over and embraced him; he stiffened in surprised, then hugged her as tightly as he could.

"I swear I won't tell anyone Naruto if you don't want me to. I won't even tell Tsunade."

He was quiet for a moment, and then responded "Please don't tell anyone…No one can know. Thank you Hinata-chan"

She nodded. _Yes…I know Even if you don't love me the way I wish you would, I can still protect you like you have protected me._

* * *

Naruto entered his apartment. The sound of his feet on the cold wood floor seemed deafening to him. He dropped his keys on the coffee table and flinched, the tinkling crash was so** fucking** loud.

He calmly walked into his bedroom. The blond curled up in bed, held a pillow to his mouth and screamed.

* * *

Deep in a forest, several miles from Konoha was a house. It was a typical one story eastern style home on the slightly large side. It was not very noticeable, aside from the fact it was a house in the middle of a forest.

No, it was the inhabitants that were interesting.

Karin was lying on a faded blue couch and was scowling up at the ceiling. Suigetsu and Juugo were playing a card game on the coffee table in front of her. The three of them were silent as the dead, not entirely sure they were hearing what they were hearing.

Sasuke was fucking humming.

Admittedly, she hadn't known Sasuke for a long time, but she understood his personality pretty well in her opinion. He had two faces; an angry glare and a passive apathetic look. At least, these were the only expressions she's ever seen on him.

The door was open and Sasuke was sitting on the porch as he polished his sword. And he was humming.

From her vantage point, Karin saw the back of his inky black hair and broad shoulders. She saw him rubbing the blade of his sword with a cloth. The tune Sasuke was humming was a soft melody; it had a dreamlike wistful quality that suited his low velvet voice.

Karin felt that something was wrong. Something didn't feel right. It sent alarms off in her head that rang so loud her head ached.

* * *

Heh heh…I betcha didn't think I would update this fast….but I did :D

A gift to all of you for your amazing support :)

I have finals and graduation coming up, so I have no clue when I'll be able to update again…possibly in June.

Happy Reading.

Btw: The thing about adding hot water to a metal jar lid to make it easier to open is true. I do it all the time. Hold the lid under hot water for thirty seconds or so. Dry the lid with a cloth, and while it's still warm twist the lid open. It helps to use a rubber grip.


	6. Operation, Lie

Hello everyone, guess what? I PASSED ALL MY CLASSES AND WILL BE GRADUATING TOMMOROW!! OMG!! You have no idea how stressed out I've been lately…but now I'm fine and can resume being a slacker now and spending copious amounts of time writing and hanging on the internet. Yays.

* * *

**This chapter is dedicated to ****Barking Spiders**** who said she was having a bad day :)**

* * *

A sparrow was flying through the sky; a special jutsu had been used on it to help it find the person it was looking for. Its instinct gave a sharp tug to the right; the bird followed the feeling and swooped down low. The chakra it was linked to was close!

The bird stopped flapping its wings, instead gliding until it landed on the shoulder of a white haired man.

The middle aged male turned in surprise to his sudden guest.

"Ho? What's this?" He noticed a piece of white parchment tied carefully to the bird's left leg with orange twine. He carefully untied the burden from the bird's leg, as soon as he did so the small sparrow flitted off the jutsu that had clung to it had been dispelled.

Jiraiya scanned the letter with growing interest.

_Pervy Sage,_

_I have a problem; I can ask only you for help. Come to my apartment sometime at night._

_N.U _

_P.S: Don't let anyone see you come_

_What the hell is Naruto's problem? _Jiraiya had been away for the past two months for 'research' he had been thinking about going to Konoha anyway, but now his student had just given an actual incentive.

"'don't let anyone see you' **Please,** what does he think I am, some pathetic gennin?"

* * *

All was still and quiet in the sleeping town of Konoha. Except for a few strategically placed Anbu Black Ops, there was no one out on the streets.

Jiraiya slipped passed all the guards unnoticed, and walked quickly down a familiar alleyway. The novelist sighed when he spotted the apartment. It wasn't that it falling apart…it just seemed sad somehow. The building seemed tired, worn out and run down. It seemed to sag a little, possible tired and didn't see the need to stand up straight like it did when it was young. The passing wind and rain and snow of the years had exhausted the abode, causing it to long for the day when it could finally rest. He chuckled.

_Who says I can't write anything but erotica?_

He walked up the stairs and knocked on the door (it seemed to protest with a creak when he did) Jiraiah heard shuffling behind the door; a scrap of the locks clicking out of place, and then the door was tentatively opened.

Jiraiya's eyes widened. There was a petite blond haired blue eyed girl at the door. Weird, she could have been Naruto's little sister. He stepped back, and looked around. Yeah, this was where Naruto's apartment was. It had always been his. What the Hell?

He flushed in confusion, "Oh, excuse me miss it appears I've mistakenly gone-"

"Would you just hurry up and get in here Pervy sage! I don't want anyone to see you!"

Jiraiya looked down in surprise. The lighting was poor, but his eyes had adjusted and only now did he notice the three scars donning the sides of the young woman's face.

The Sannin looked flabbergasted "…Kid? Na…Naruto??"

The girl scowled. "Yes, you perv now get in here!" She moved away from the door and gestured with her hand to enter the room. Jiraiah shook his head in bewilderment. _This can't be a trap…right? If that's really Naruto, what's with the girly getup?_

Naruto closed the door and slid the deadbolt home. The blond stood facing the door, not looking at Jiraiya.

"So. That's really you Naruto? What the hell? Turn back already."

Naruto turned around and stared sullenly at Jiraiya. "I **can't.**"

Jiraiya sat down on the beaten orange couch in the living room. Naruto walked over and sat in a blue arm chair across from him.

"Okay…care to enlighten me?" Jiraiya asked.

Instead of answering, he started playing with a ring on his finger, idly twisting it around as he tried to form his words.

"I can't turn back because I'm pregnant…and also for-"

Naruto was interrupted by his teacher's hysterical laughter.

* * *

"Okay, what the hell. It's really beginning to bug me. So just tell me…did you get **laid** or something? 'Cause you were **humming** earlier and ….yeah. You were humming earlier. So did you get some?"

_**Crack.**__ Thump_.

Karin and Juugo looked down at the now unconscious Suigetsu whom was lying on the floor. Sasuke's hand was still clenched into a fist. His black eyes glared into theirs.

He remarked dully, "Any more questions about my prior behavior?"

The two other teenagers shook their heads furiously.

* * *

Jiraiya managed to climb back onto the couch with some difficulty because he kept snickering and would burst back into laughter. By the time he had finally managed to make it back on the couch he had tears in his eyes and a cramp in his side.

Naruto had his arms crossed and was glaring daggers at him.

Jiraiya attempted to poise himself and donned his best serious face.

"No really, why don't you change back?"

Naruto fumed. "I already told you goddamit. I. Am. Pregnant. With child. Expecting. Kocked up. Preggers. Bun in the oven. Any other possible slang term that means **I have a baby inside of me.**

Jiraiya stared. "Really?" Naruto nodded. "You're not lying?" Naruto rolled his eyes. "Why the hell would I lie about this?"

Jiraya shrugged. "Well, you're a prankster. But most of your pranks involve naked women…not pregnant women. I like the naked women pranks better."

Naruto glared. "I'll keep that in mind." Was all he said.

However Jiraiya had a sneaking suspicion the blond really meant:

"_Shut up or I'll fucking castrate you."_

Jiraya rubbed the back of his head nervously. "So…whose the dad?"

Naruto uncrossed his arms and sank further into the chair. "I'd really rather not say." Jiraiya felt hopeful for a minute. Naruto never got angry at him, so he was glad the moment had passed. Problem was that now the blond seemed depressed.

The Sage looked at Naruto seriously. He couldn't believe this was happening…Holy shit. "Okay…so did you want to um, abort it?"

Naruto shuddered. "Um…no. Not particularly."

Jiraiya frowned. "Why not? It'd be the most convenient for you. And you really can't deal with this right now, Naruto. Between the Akatsuki, and your quest to find Sasuke, having baby just isn't going to fit in there. What will you do when you're too big to fight? Also, there's going to be a point in the pregnancy when you won't even be able to use chakra for combat or anything."

Naruto paled at the thought of being too weak to perform any jutsu. He shook his head though. "Jiraiya…Look, I may not be the smartest guy…or the strongest or anything. But, I know…even if I'm not a real girl…I know I will regret it later. If I kill the baby.

Jiraiya rubbed his face God; he was talking about a pregnancy with his student.

His male student.

"Alright kid. Um guess your not a kid…you're gonna be a mommy?" Jiraiya dodged the pillow thrown at him. "Okay sorry. So what do you want to do?"

Naruto clutched the other pillow in front of him. He sighed. "One: I don't want anyone to know. This is for several reasons…one of them being I could never look at anyone again. I just…Oh God, what would Kakashi say? Or Tsunade? Or **Sakura**? No…just no. Two: I say you take me on a training mission."

Jiraiya frowned. "Training mission?"

Naruto nodded "yeah… 'training mission'. Though it's more like, I'm gonna be hiding away from everyone for about a year, and then when I come back with a baby I'll tell everyone I found it in the bulrushes or something."

The fact that Naruto looked quite pleased as punch with this idea disturbed Jiraiya.

"Tsunade won't let you. You know how paranoid she's been about you lately-"

Naruto grinned. "She owes me one. It's indirectly her fault I'm like this…it's mostly mine though…I shouldn't have gotten drunk and slept with that guy."

"I believe that's called 'date rape' Naruto."

"Shut the hell up. He was drunk too. Wait…yeah, he was drunk too. Uzumaki Naruto does not get raped."

Jiraiya rolled his eyes. "Okay, fine. The only reason I even come to Konoha is to check up on you, really. So I might as well."

Naruto looked thoughtful. "Um, pervy sage…I may not stay with you the entirety of my pregnancy. I might find some no name village and tough it out there."

Jiraiya sighed with relief. "Oh good, I don't think I could handle you waddling around with me when you're nine months pregnant. It might put a dent in my research. But, what will you do when you're in labor?"

The blond rolled his eyes. "Midwife. Duh. They have at least one in every village right?"

Jiraiya nodded. "Okay Operation sneak out pregnant Naruto is in order. Phase one: Lie to Tsunade like a lying liar who lies."

* * *

Naruto was not a thinker. He was the type of person who would make spontaneous decisions that seemed to be easiest in whatever situation he was in.

Example? Best friend Sasuke runs away to be Orochi-bastard's bitch. Decision? Run after said bitchy best friend and bring back home. Failed…for now.

Any other day, Naruto would love to find Sasuke and attempt to drag him back to Konoha. However, Naruto didn't think he would be able to stand seeing his lost friend right now... He was just teensy bit**pissed off as hell** with him right now. Especially now that Sasuke had **knocked him fucking up**.

It wasn't as if he had known that the sandy blond stranger at the bar was Sasuke…and technically he didn't say he couldn't get him pregnant…but…He didn't say he could either. There was a line between best friends and fuck buddies. Sasuke had not only crossed that line, but he had also set it on fire and blown the rest of the remains to smithereens.

Naruto had gotten the shaft. In more ways than one.

Anyway…back to the subject at hand, So when Naruto found out he was pregnant he decided to do the simplest thing that came to mind…Run the fuck away.

Which was what he was currently trying to do. Just as soon as he succeeds in completing phase one of the plan Jiraya and Naruto had concocted last night.

"A training mission brat?" Tsunade asked, slightly stunned.

Naruto nodded "Yeah, I'm just not strong enough…I think going on a leave for a while. Jiraiah said he was going to go traveling for research, and offered me to come along. And who knows, maybe we'll find someone who can cure my little problem"

Tsunade's mouth was slightly agape. She looked up and down Naruto's body, and frowned.

"Um, but you are still a girl."

Naruto rolled his eyes theatrically. "Yes, I realize that. Still, I'm going to be stuck in this body 'cause we haven't figured out what's wrong with me yet"

Tsunade sighed. "Well I tried everything I could think of to get it off. But it seems like for some reason or another that jutsu is stuck on you for now."

Naruto sulked. "Yeah... yeah…." He had a sneaking suspicion that the ring was the cause of all of this. After his little freak out the other night, he'd desperately tried to once again take the damn thing off. In his mind he flipped through all of his failed attempts at loosening the ring around his finger; butter, oil, shampoo, dish soap…he even had grabbed a pair of pliers at one point to try and pry it off, but the ring had remained defiantly snug on his finger.

Naruto looked down on it again, the gleam of the platinum metal somehow seemed smug to him. He didn't **need** his left ring finger for anything right? Naruto thought darkly.

The thought made him stop and think. What would happen to the baby though? If Naruto got the ring off (which was most likely impossible) and performed the seal, he would turn back into his original male self. So…he would no longer have a womb…and the baby would die. Would it just disappear? Or would its tiny corpse remain in his body?

Naruto shivered at the thought.

"Anyway baa-chan I really just kinda wanna get away for a while. Everyone's been weirded out that I'm a girl. Well not Hinata… or Sai. He just said 'well considering the fact that you didn't have a dick before either, it isn't much of a change.'"

She ran a hand through her hair. "How long?"

Naruto looked at her with all the seriousness he could muster. "Two years."

Tsunade scowled. "Hahahahahaha**NO.** Thankyou come again."

Naruto pressed on, determined."Come on. Two years? That's nothing, I was gone for three before! I'll be with Jiraiya the entire time…again! Nothing will happen alright?"

Tsunade folded her hands under her chin. "Alright Naruto. I'll write you a training mission leave. I have just two conditions."

Naruto nodded, encouraging her to continue.

"One: No Akatsuki. Just stay the hell away from them for now."

"No problem. I like being alive, thankyouverymuch."

"Good. And two: **No chasing after Sasuke**."

Naruto's anger swelled up at the man's name.

"Definitely no problem." He growled out from between clenched teeth.

* * *

Naruto calculated in his head_. Lesse, if I'm preggy for nine months…and I've already been pregnant for one. Nine, minus one…So I'll be pregnant for eight more months. And eighteen months minus eight… I'd have about ten months to take care of the kid, and come back to Konoha with him or her._

Naruto could claim he found the baby in an abandoned villiage or another bullshit story. Everyone would believe that right?

_Unless the baby is the spit image of Sasuke or me. Fuck. Well, black hair and blond hair isn't uncommon so it should be fine._

Naruto finished packing away the last of any weapons he might need. Jiraiya was sitting on Naruto's bed as he wrote something in a notebook. Possibly something for the latest installment of his novel.

Jiraiya looked up when he heard the zipper of Naruto's back pack hiss shut.

"Not too heavy okay? You're already carrying 'precious cargo'. And also, we should get you some lady clothes."

Naruto frowned. "What's the point of having new clothes if I'm just gonna get bigger soon?"

Jiraiya put the small notebook in the pocket on the inside of his vest.

"Look, we're trying to remain inconspicuous. We'll get some girl clothes for you tomorrow okay?"

Naruto huffed as he pulled the back pack on.

"Fine, but I am not wearing a skirt. **Ever."**

Jiraiya laughed. "I would never let you live that down."

* * *

Sasuke was somewhat confused. An emotion that he was for the most part unfamiliar with until recent events. He looked around the small apartment he had just infiltrated. No sign of the person he was looking for. He entered the bedroom and an picture caught his eye.

The photograph depicted three youths and an adult. The man was smiling, his hands were resting on a brunette and blond's head. A pink haired girl was smiling cutely in the center. The brunette looked sullen, he probably would rather be training. The blond was grimacing angrily, but somehow it still managed to be a grin at the same time.

Sasuke looked around the empty bedroom once more.

_Naruto? Where did you go?_

* * *

Jeez, did I use enough page breaks? Okay so there's the latest chapter. Betcha weren't expecting Naruto to run away didja? Mwahahahaha!


	7. Lovely In The Sunlight

Ah…feel the love. I feel it. Do you?

* * *

"For Gods' sake Naruto, can't you pick a garment that doesn't look like an orange took a gigantic shit on it?"

Naruto huffed at Jiraiya "Hey. You wanted me to pick out girl clothes. I'm getting girly clothes, so shut up. I want it to be orange. It's going to be orange."

Jiraiya was sitting boredly in an uncomfortable chair, critiquing the newest outfit Naruto had chosen.

It was certainly practical as far as female attire goes. Naruto was wearing a pair of black pants that went down to his knees. The overcoat he was wearing was a dull burnt orange and fell just slightly above the knees. The coat was short sleeved with a hood, and Naruto donned a pair of black gloves that were fingerless and went up to his elbow. Over the hand was a protective metal plate, made for blocking flying kunai and other weapons. Two belts crisscrossed on his waist with a pack filled with weapons and a med kit attached to each one. His shoes were pretty much identical to the ones he wore as a boy, only these were smaller to fit his now more petite shoe size. He kept the head guard he had when he was male, but now had it tied around his neck in a tribute to Hinata.

He had gone back to the Hyuga estate before he left. He thanked her profusely and the sweet girl had smiled, saying she wouldn't tell anyone the real reason behind him leaving. She had also given him a small compact book on pregnancy and some prenatal vitamins he would need to start taking. He kept them now in his left waist pack. Someday, he would repay Hinata for everything she had done for him. That girl was a living saint.

Jiraiya sighed impatiently. "Fine. Fine. We'll get that one." _But did it have to be __**orange**__?_

Naruto beamed happily. "Oh goody, and here I was just about to bribe you to get it for me. So glad I didn't have to do that though."

Jiraiya was suddenly alert. "Bribe me? How?"

Naruto smirked. "Weeellll…seeing as how I don't need to now, there's no point."

Jiraiya longed to punch the teenager in the head as said teenager sauntered off to pay for his new clothes.

* * *

It was a month later that Naruto decided it would be best to go separate ways with Jiraiya.

Lately, Jiraiya had been throwing nervous glances at Naruto whenever he thought he wasn't looking. Yesterday, Naruto had somehow managed to trip on an upraised plank when they were crossing a bridge and fell. Jiraiya damn near had a conniption fit and spent the next half hour fussing over Naruto and checking and rechecking for any wounds and if the baby was okay.

Naruto appreciated Jiraiya's concern, but after living by himself since the age of nine or so, he had grown to be a very independent young man. Jiraiya's constant anxiety was making Naruto feel smothered, which was never a good thing for the blond.

They had wandered to a small village by a forest. Jiraiya had wanted to refill on their provisions, and as Naruto looked around the quaint humble village he found that he liked it quite a bit. A couple of children were playing with a colorful rubber ball as their moms sat together on a bench and chatted cheerfully with one another. Naruto smiled, and felt an unknown emotion creep up his body. It wasn't bad…just different. It felt somewhat similar to nostalgia. He looked up above him. Some how without all the large buildings, the sky just seemed so much brighter.

Jiraiya came back from the shop, and grinned when he spotted Naruto in the middle of the road looking at the sky. His smile faded.

_Is it really a good idea for him to just be standing the road? There aren't any carts or horses or anything but…you never know….Oh, Gods…what if a freak runaway horse drawn cart were to run right into him….Oh shit_

"Na-Naruto!" Jiraiya called, in a somewhat panicked manner.

Said blond turned around and smiled lazily, and walked relaxingly back to his sensei.

"Hey, pervy sage. What's up?" He looked curiously at his sensei who suddenly had a relieved look on his face.

Jiraiya grinned down at him. "So, shorty. Ready to head out?"

Naruto felt that awkward feeling creep up into his gut. The feeling you get when you need tell something brutally honest to one of your friends but don't want to hurt their feelings.

"A-ano pervy sage…I was thinking I would just stay here. It's out of the way and stuff…no one would find me or anything. Plus, I've been getting more tired as we've gone on. At this rate, I'll just be slowing you down."

Jiraiya looked at Naruto thoughtfully, and then looked around at the village. It seemed safe enough. But still…Naruto was like a grandson to him… he didn't like the idea of his second favorite student being left in an unfamiliar place such as this.

"Are you sure Naruto? I mean…we can wait a bit longer…"

Naruto shook his head. "No, really it's fine. You mentioned you had some stuff to talk about with your toad friends, and I'm just slowing us down more each day…seriously. Go ahead. I'll be fine."

Jiraiya frowned, not completely convinced.

"Where will you stay? Do you even have enough money to stay here for nine months?"

Naruto smiled. "Actually, I'm two months pregnant so I only have _seven_ more months to go. And I never spend my money, so I have _tons_ saved up. I brought it all with me so I should be fine staying at the local inn, it's down the main road a bit."

Jiraiya sighed. He had trouble remembering…but according to Konoha, Naruto was a man. He could make his own decisions now. Even if it stung just a little, deep in Jiraiya's heart.

He grinned. "Well, brat. If that's the way you wanna be then so be it."

Naruto grinned back, glad that Jiraiya's somber mood had lifted.

* * *

Sasuke was sitting on a boulder, absently twirling a kunai around his left index finger. His other arm was propped up on his knee and his hand was holding his face in a contemplative position.

He was currently ignoring his three other teammates who were looking at him uncomfortably.

It was Suigetsu who dared to break the silence. "So…what's up?"

Sasuke glared at him before speaking.

"We have a problem. I have several sources that have been keeping me updated on Uchiha Itachi's whereabouts. It turns out, that in the past two and a half months every single one of them has been murdered. Even the one I met with not long ago, from Suna."

"I don't think Itachi is doing this. He wouldn't bother with something like that, he only kills on orders or people who get in the way of his target."

Karin frowned and then offered up somewhat hesitantly, "Perhaps it was a coincidence?"

Sasuke's eyes narrowed at her. "I had fifteen sources. They were scattered in villiges in Konoha, Suna and Mist. The odds of them all having been killed by different hit men within a few weeks of each other is probably incalculable."

Sasuke stood up abruptly.

"Change of plans. There's a village not far from here. We'll go there to re supply and then we'll just have to think of another way to get information on Uchiha Itachi's location or at least the direction he may be heading in."

His three teammates stood up, once more they were confused all over again. The other day, Sasuke had seemed to be in a good mood. About a month ago he disappeared for three days and when he came back it seemed like a dark cloud was looming over him.

It was just really, really weird.

* * *

About an hour later they made their way through a village. Of course, there were stares. It wasn't as though they were very inconspicuous…Juugo was nearly seven feet tall, Karing and Suigetsu both had unusual hair coloring and Sasuke's brooding handsome features didn't help matters much either.

Karin scoffed annoyed, "Gods, you'd think they'd never seen shinobi before!"

Juugo interjected softly "Ah, Karin I don't actually see any shinobi around here. I don't think this village has any…"

The red haired girl looked around. Now that he mentioned it…it was true. There really weren't any shinobi anywhere…how weird. How the hell did they protect themselves?

She paused in her steps, thoughtful.

_Why would a village not bother having a single shinobi? That's just stupid…unless they had something that made them strong enough to go without any ninja…_

A gravelly deep voice broke her out of her reverie,

"Karin? Why are you stopping, do you feel sick?" She looked up to see Juugo looking at her with sincere concern in his eyes. Inwardly, she felt a prick of affection hit her. Juugo could be scary really _really _terrifying…but in the end he was more like a sheep in wolf's clothing. She shook her head "Ah, no I was just thinking…sorry"

He nodded, placated and stood up straight; rising back up to his full nearly seven feet.

_Okay…maybe a sheep in a __**grizzly bear's**__ clothing…yikes._

* * *

Naruto smiled at the sweet inn keeper's daughter. She had long pale brown hair and gray eyes, she was taller then him (he noticed to his chagrin) and had a very soft voice. She achingly reminded him of Hinata. His hand fingered the headband around his neck as he thought back to his dear friend back in Konoha. _Gods,_ he prayed _Don't let anything happen to that girl, __**please**__._

Her name was Mitsuki, and she was engaged to the village doctor's apprentice. Gin, was his name apparently.Mitsuki was currently leading him up the stairs to his room, all the while chatting to him amiable.

"Well, here you are um…I'm sorry, I never caught your name."

Naruto smiled at her again "Natsuko Uzu is my name."

"Ah! Right, Uzu-san…Well, here is your room Uzu-san. I hope it's to your liking, I just cleaned and aired it out today."

He looked at the spacious room, and the lovely natural light that filtered in from the large bay window. The furnishings consisted of a simple double bed, a small table and a seating area. He looked at Mitsuki happily. "It's wonderful, I'll take it!"

* * *

The next morning, Naruto believed he had full rights to be pissed off at Sasuke. First of all…morning sickness. What a joy that turned out to be. With every heave of his stomach, Naruto cursed Sasuke in his mind, praying that the missing nin trip over his own feet or accidentally nick himself with his own blade. However, this was nothing compared to the atrocity that Sasuke had caused to befall the blond.

He hadn't had ramen in the past month in a half, and decided he was long overdue to feast on his beloved noodle dish. Naruto took a quick shower then headed downstairs and sat down at one of the tables, he inwardly celebrated when he saw various dishes of ramen were on the menu.

Mitsuki came by to take his order and tell him good morning. The girl barely had time to ask him if he wanted something to drink when Naruto had asked her to bring him some pork ramen. Mitsuki had smiled and flitted off to tell the chef the latest order.

Naruto's hand went into the left pack at his waist to take out a bottle. He opened the glass bottle and took out one of his prenatal vitamins. Naruto swallowed it dry, and slipped the bottle back into his pack, exchanging it for the small book on pregnancy Hinata had given to him.

_Ho'kay…when does this morning sickness crap end?_

Naruto looked through the index and then flipped to the proper page scanning it until he found what he was looking for.

"…_morning sickness affects seventy percent of pregnant women and will usually dissipate after the first trimester…"_

He groaned. _Awwww crap._ He had to endure another entire month paying tribute to the porcelain god of shit and vomit.

"Ah, Uzu-sama…your ramen is here."

Naruto beamed at the girl as though she was an angel sent to him by the ever amiable God of ramen (and other assorted noodle dishes).

"Ohmigod thank you soooo much you have no idea how-" Naruto abruptly paused in his praising. Something was wrong. Something was very very wrong.

He smelled the broth and out of nowhere felt his stomach curdle in disgust. Naruto felt a flood of dread steep through him as every fiber of his being screamed out in rejection against the noodle and pork dish. He stood up so fast, the chair behind him clattered to the floor loudly.

Mitsuki looked at him, with raw surprise on her face. "Uzu-sama? Is something wrong with the food?"

He looked at her mournfully. "No, no…the food is fine. I just…can't…eat it."

She looked at him somewhat puzzled. He had to admit, what he just said didn't make much sense at all.

Naruto rubbed his forehead, irritated with himself.

"I'm…I'm pregnant…and apparently, I can't eat raman."

Mitsuki looked so excited, and even emitted an overjoyed girlish squeal. "You're pregnant?! Oh Gods! How exciting!" Forgetting herself, she hugged Naruto and when she let him go, she was bouncing up and down on the balls of her feet.

Naruto's eyes had widened comically and were looking at the ecstatic girl with disbelief. Um…he didn't know pregnancy was _that_ happy of an occasion…

* * *

Karin cast an irritated glance at a squealing waitress on the other side of the room. She picked at her curry dish, wishing, that her three other teammates hadn't gone out to get provision's without her. Okay…she had overslept, but only a little! The four of them had decided to just stay at the local inn since they weren't hurting for money and they were sick of using the forest floor for a mattress and rocks for pillows.

Karin missed the abandoned cabin they had stayed at…if only there was a way to just plant houses wherever you went…that would be nice.

She cast her eyes back to the waitress who was now chatting excitedly with a somewhat pretty girl with short golden hair. Whatever they were talking about, the blond didn't seem as enthusiastic as the waitress. Karin, out of boredom and curiosity decided to listen in.

"Oh wow! So who's the father?" the waitress asked.

The blond blushed, scratching a finger against her strangely tattooed cheek. (or were those scars?)

"Um, my uh, best friend is…"

This seemed to encourage the waitress even more "Uwa! That's so wonderful! Do you love him?"

The blond blushed an ever deeper shade of red. "Well…uh, yeah. But, I think it's one-sided."

The waitress smile dropped a little "Huh? You mean he isn't coming here?"

Naruto felt a stab hit him in the heart. "Uhm…no."

"Wha? What are you going to do then?"

"I'm just gonna say here for the remainder of my pregnancy…I'll raise the baby for a year or so before I have to return to my village."

The waitress now looked crestfallen. Karin couldn't blame her, that chick was in a jam. That totally sucks. But, maybe next time she'll think before she spreads her legs for her so called 'best friend'. She strained her eyes at the girl for a moment. Wait…those were definitely scars.

Suddenly the waitress smiled at the blond girl. "I'm gonna help you! My fiancée is an excellent doctor, his training will be over with in a couple months! He and his sensei can help you, I'll help you too. What foods do you think you can eat without getting sick?"

The blond girl now looked at the waitress, obviously touched. "You don't…have to do that…"

The other girl shook her head. "No." she stated firmly, planting her hands on her hips. "I want to help you, we women have to stick together!"

Karin saw a look of amusement and something else pass over the blonde's features.

The waitress called to the innkeeper that she was taking a break, before ushering the blonde girl up the stairs to her room, presumably.

* * *

It was naught twenty minutes later that Karin's other teammates entered the inn. They spotted her boredly sitting at a table, and sat down with her. The waitress from before was done taking her break (and done talking to the blond) and took her teammates orders. Suigetsu ordered seven glasses of water, Jugo asked for a baked vegetable platter and Sasuke wanted hot tea. Karin didn't want anything.

Karin sighed, well, at least her 'friends' (using the term as loose as a one dollar whore) were here with her now.

Suigetsu chugged down his first glass before turning to her. "So, anything interesting happen while we were out?"

Karin shrugged. "Not really, there was some drama with this chick that was knocked up. She said she got pregnant by her best buddy, but I think that's a lie."

Juugo frowned. "What do you mean?"

Karin gestured to her own face. "She had scars on her cheeks. I'm thinking she got raped by some sick fuck who decided to carve her up."

Juugo frowned unhappily.

Suigetsu shrugged. "Well, there are some messed up people out there…"

"Did you say scars?"

Three pairs of eyes turned to look at Sasuke who was eyeing Karin over his cup of tea.

She looked at him surprised (Why does he care?) "Um…yeah."

He lowered his cup, instead folding his hands and leaning this chin on them.

"What did they look like?"

"The scars? Oh…um, like horizontal lines. I think…three? Yeah, three…on each cheek. I'm pretty sure."

"Describe the pregnant girl. Was she showing?"

Juugo and Suigetsu looked completely floored.

"Er, no…She said she had morning sickness…which is usually in the first trimester. She was totally flat."

"What was her hair and eye color?"

Karin frowned, but complied. "Blonde, and her eye color? She was kinda far away but they were lightish. Not brown or black…maybe green or blue.

"Golden blonde?"

"Um…yeah."

Sasuke suddenly smirked. "She wasn't wearing **orange** by any chance was she?"

Karin looked at him, now completely flabbergasted. "Uh yeah…a lot of it. Orange and black."

Sasuke stood up without warning. "You all stay here. I'll be back later. Don't come after me." he ordered coldly.

He turned to Karin. "Where did the blond go?"

Karin jerked a thumb in the 'up' direction. "Upstairs. I don't know what room she's in though."

"Right."

He turned around, and ascended the stairs. His teammates felt that he much resembled an animal carefully stalking its prey.

* * *

Naruto was sitting on the window seat. It was the afternoon; the sun was high filling the room half way with light. He enjoyed the feeling of the warmth washing over him, the heat tingling pleasantly on his exposed skin and even warmed him under his clothes.

"You look quite lovely like that."

Naruto felt his heart skyrocket, and he ungracefully stumbled to his feet. The young man felt the color drain from his face when he realized who was standing in front of him.

"Sas-Sasuke?" His voice sounded pathetically small.

Sasuke smiled at the blond, his black eyes trailing up and down his body calculatingly.

"Hello Naruto, I have a few questions for you…And you are going to answer them all."

* * *

Okay guys…I have some very good reasons for why I haven't updated in a while. I've been preoccupied with the house and packing things away and getting it ready for people. Then my mom had to have an emergency appendectomy. There were complications with her recovery and we had to go to the hospital again. There was an abscess…and they said she had pneumonia but apparently she didn't and it's just been really, really fucked up over here. I've sorta become her nurse and I have admittedly had time to myself, but whenever I do, I just don't have the inspiration to write the sasunaru mpreg goodness that you all came to read.

I know I sound like I'm just bitching a fit…and I'm really really sorry for making y'all wait. I love this story, and I'm not going to give up on it. I'll update when I can, thank you so much for reading and reviewing. I'll update hopefully soon. Thanks for putting up with me.

Oh, and if You guys wanna see what Naruto's outfit looks like go here(remove spaces):

genki-angel-chan. deviantart. com /art/ Naruto-Outfit-Ambivalence-87968345


	8. Golden Questions

As a reward for all the reviews and nice words…you guys get a cookie.

So without further adieu, here's the next chapter.

* * *

Naruto stood numbly on his feet, he no longer felt warm. Instead, it seemed as though the heat had been sucked out of the room since Sasuke came in. He felt an ache in his chest.

It was always mixed feelings with Sasuke; he could never feel only one emotion when it came to his best friend. He loved him, God how he _loved_ him. And yet, there was always an undercurrent of_ fear_ with his love for Sasuke. And _anger_. Lots of anger, for different things; for hurting all their friends and comrades when he left, for trying to kill Naruto for power. It hurt, Sasuke had deeply hurt Naruto, and while Naruto still loved him, he felt almost no trust in the slightly older man. Sasuke had saved his life on a whim, and three years later he had tried to kill him on a whim. Sasuke was like controlled chaos, lethal and would lash out anytime he pleased without warning.

That scared Naruto more than anything.

"Naruto, did you hear me?"

The blond nodded before asking. "Did you find me? Or, were you…" he trailed off lamely not sure what he was trying to say.

Sasuke's face was an apathetic mask of ice, and Naruto felt a chill go up his spine.

"No, it was a complete coincidence actually. My teammates happened to be describing a young pregnant woman she saw, and upon my inquiries, it turned out to be you."

"Oh." Naruto folded his arms, trying to warm up.

Sasuke stood in the middle of the room, apparently with no intention of approaching Naruto. He tipped his head slightly to the side, in a gesture that almost imitated childish curiosity, though Naruto knew it was of contemplative analysis.

"Alright Naruto. First question. Are you really pregnant?"

Naruto's mouth opened and closed several times. He could lie but…

"Er…yeah. Kinda. Well, not 'kinda' I guess with pregnancy you either are or aren't right? Though I really wouldn't know considering I don't have much experience with all this girl stu-"

"You're rambling, dobe."

Naruto shut his mouth almost immediately, surprised by the affectionate insult.

"Second question. We both know it was me you slept with several months ago. Have you slept with anyone else since then?"

Naruto glared at him. "What the fuck do you take me for, some slut? No, I haven't slept with anyone else!"

Sasuke stared at him intensely. "Are you certain? And as for that slut comment, you did sleep with a total stranger that one time. You didn't know it was me until later."

Naruto raised and eyebrow. "Well, right back atcha. Whore."

The end of Sasuke's mouth twitched into a half smirk. "Well, I suppose I can't argue with that one…but the answer to those two questions lead to one conclusion."

Naruto frowned, not liking the sudden possessive gleam in Sasuke's onyx colored eyes.

"So, the child is mine then".

The blond shuddered, wary of the sudden change in Sasuke's mood. He moved away from the brunette, and backed into a corner.

Sasuke walked forward, and placed his hands on either side of Naruto against the wall. Naruto paled considerably.

"O-Okay, you know what? I lied, I slept with about a dozen guys…and um, yeah. No, maybe it was like, two dozen? Yeah, I was like the neighborhood bicycle--everyone had a ride, in fact. Sai, Kiba, Neji, Gaara, some total strangers at another bar I hung out at…"

"You have always been the worst liar, ever."

"Sasuke, look. Don't…do anything to me. I'll leave okay? You'll never see either of us ever again. Just don't kill me. _Please_. I can't fight, something's wrong with my chakra…"

Naruto flinched when he felt a pair of lips against his neck.

_What the hell?_

Sasuke pressed his forehead against Naruto's, his eyes looking deeply into the blonde's.

"I'm not going to kill you. Calm down, you're shaking like an autumn leaf."

Naruto glared at him. "Shut up! I think I'm allowed to be a little freaked out, okay? Popping out of nowhere…"

He trailed off, stopping all together at the look in Sasuke's eyes. They were their usual black, but at the moment were so intense with some emotion Naruto couldn't figure out, he wanted to run away.

Obviously, he couldn't.

One of Sasuke's hands pressed against the side of Naruto's face, his thumb stroking the three scars on that side.

"I'm not going to kill you Naruto, I'm going to take you and keep you."

Naruto glared at him "What? What the hell are you talking about?"

Sasuke stared into his blue eyes for a moment, before leaning forward a little to kiss Naruto full on the lips. Said blond jumped at the sudden contact, and attempted to move away in surprise. Sasuke was having none of it and took his hands off of the wall to wrap his arms around Naruto and pull the blond flush against him. He heard Naruto emit a soft whimper, but merely ran one of his hands up his warm back.

Unfortunately, the belts over his coat made it impossible for Sasuke to just take the coat off of Naruto, so instead he began unfastening them as he continued to kiss him deeply on the lips. Naruto clinched his eyes shut. He hated this, that he'd become like pathetically malleable putty whenever Sasuke got too close to him. It was like when they had been reunited after three years, back at Orochimaru's hideout. Sasuke had shot forward, to put an arm around Naruto…and it was only after the blond had been threatened with death that he had been able to move.

He heard a metallic hiss as Sasuke unzipped his jacket. The noise startled Naruto out of his trance and with a yelp, pushed Sasuke away.

The two regarded each other as they panted slightly. Impatient, Sasuke spoke first;

"What? What's wrong with you?"

Naruto shook his head, as though to clear his mind. He looked at Sasuke wearily.

"I'm not going to do this." He gestured vaguely to himself and then Sasuke. The brunette glared and walked the few steps it took to be close to the blond again. His hands grabbed the younger's forearms and pulled him close.

"What are you talking about?"

Naruto glared up at him. "I want to bring you back Sasuke. But thanks to you, I'm in no position to do such a thing. I don't want…to do something like this with you…because it'll just hurt worse when you leave again."

Sasuke's index finger and thumb grabbed Naruto's chin to keep him from turning away.

"Didn't you hear me? You aren't going to _bring_ me anywhere. I'm going to _take_ you and _keep_ you. Understand?"

Naruto stared levelly at him, pretending he hadn't heard his best friend's declaration.

"I have to go back to Konoha in twenty two months. That was the deal I struck with Tsunade, I believe the other part was not to associate with you. You're making me break my promise, teme and that pisses me off."

"You aren't going anywhere…Unless it's with me."

"If I don't show up in the allotted twenty-two months, she's gonna send shinobi after me…and…I really, really don't want that."

Sasuke frowned a little. "Oh?"

Suddenly Naruto decided to change the subject, before Sasuke found out something that Naruto really didn't want him to.

"So, um what are your teammates like?"

Sasuke's eyes narrowed suspiciously. "Naruto…Tsunade doesn't know you're pregnant…does she?"

"Was one of them that middle aged guy at the bar? Naw, couldn't be him…"

Sasuke moved his hand to a rather private place on the blonde's body and pressed there firmly.

"_Naruto_."

"GAH! Okay okay…Gods. Yeah, no she doesn't know. No one does except Jiraiya…and he left 'cause I told him it would be better that way."

Hinata also of course knew, but Naruto didn't see a reason to drag the sweet girl into the mess he was in.

Mess he was in. He was in a mess because he was pregnant. Who got him pregnant? So he was in this gigantic mess because of Sasuke.

_Hang on…wait one Goddamn minute…_

Sasuke knew that Naruto was 'the most unexpected ninja in Konoha' but still was not expecting for one hundred and ten pounds of blond, pregnant she-male fury to be unleashed on him.

Out of literally nowhere, Naruto pulled back his hand and slapped Sasuke across the face with all the strength he had, the motion turned Sasuke's head sharply to the right, and Naruto revealed in the loud cracking sound his neck bones made in protest of the sudden action.

The brunette had an expression of undiluted surprise on his face. Some blood escaped the corner of his mouth, caused from biting his tongue when Naruto had slapped him.

"…What the hell was that for?"

Naruto glared at him. "Why the _hell_ do you think?! _YOU KNOCKED ME UP_!"

Sasuke rolled his eyes, wiping the blood off his face with the back of his hand.

"Yes, I believe we've established this fact several sentences ago. Dobe."

Naruto continued to glower at Sasuke.

"Sasuke…I'm _sixteen goddamn years old_…I'm not supposed to be _pregnant_! I don't think you realize how bad this is! I'm supposed to be helping Tsunade and the others round up the Akatsuki, how am I supposed to do that when I have to worry about a baby inside of me? And also, for some reason…I can't use my chakra! The last time I was able to use it was when I sent a messenger bird to Jiraiya, and then it just died out!"

Sasuke scoffed.

"Naruto, you sure are dumb. I suspended your chakra with that ring. That's why you were unable to turn back into a girl…which I'm guessing you tried to do. The other seal I put on the ring was that you can't take it off, and anyone who tried to take if off but me or you would get their hands shocked with an electric current that would render them immobile."

There was a tension filled pause. Then Naruto shot forward like a bolt of lightning, punching Sasuke hard enough that the brunette actually stumbled backwards a couple of feet.

Sasuke glowered at the blond in front of him as he, once again wiped blood from his mouth.

"I'm getting very tired of you doing that."

"I'm getting tired of you, period. I'm pissed off at you, so it'd be best if you'd leave me alone. Okay? I'll sit down with you and have a lovely little chitchat with you about this in a year or so. Then I'll take you back to Konoha. The end. Oh wait I almost forgot… _GIVE ME BACK MY CHAKRA, YOU FREAKING DICK_!!"

Naruto's teeth clattered from the force of which hit him when Sasuke shoved him roughly back up against a wall.

Sasuke looked at him carefully before speaking. "First of all…stop hitting me. I normally would hit you right back, but you're pregnant. Second of all, I don't care what you want Naruto. You're coming with me, because I want you and you're carrying my child. And lastly; no, I won't give you back your chakra. Not for a while, or until the baby is safely out of you. The end."

Naruto continued to glare obstinately at him. "Fuck you."

Sasuke smirked at him. "Why, that's the best proposition you've had for me all morning."

Naruto placed both hands against Sasuke's chest and shoved hard. He groaned, annoyed with himself. He would have more luck pushing against a wall. He felt tears of frustration prickle in his eyes. If Sasuke ever found out how much he loved him…the bastard would probably use it to his own advantage.

_Goddamn female preggy hormones…_

He felt strong arms encircle him, Sasuke leaned down to kiss along Naruto's face; occasionally pressing his lips against a tear, taking it off of the blonde's face. Sasuke's tone hit a softer note from what it was previously.

"Naruto…what are you going to do? Stay here? You're like a sitting duck; you know the Akatsuki are looking for you. What do you think they're going to do to you once they find you? Do you think they're going to care that you're pregnant? They'll suck the Kyuubi out of you, killing you and our child in the process. Your best option is to come with me."

Naruto frowned, and pressed his head into Sasuke's chest. His words came out slightly muffled; "…I'm not happy with you right now. In fact I'm really pissed."

Sasuke ran a hand through the blonde's hair. Happy, that though he claimed otherwise, Naruto's anger had dissipated.

"I know that. And you're taking this much better than I thought you would; though I suppose it helps that you can't blast me through a wall."

"If I could use my Rasengan, you'd be eating it."

"Let's expend your energy in a more healthy way."

"Huh?"

Sasuke tipped Naruto's head back up so that he was looking at him. The blonde eyed him with a mixture of wariness and curiosity. Sasuke's dark eyes seemed to smolder at him.

"Let's have sex."

"… … … … … … … Okay, fine."

* * *

Juugo Karin and Suigetsu were still sitting at the table where Sasuke had left them about fifteen minutes ago. Juugo had long finished his food and was drinking his tea, and Suigetsu had ordered three more glasses of water.

_Doesn't he ever have to use the bathroom?!_ Karin thought, annoyed. _Stupid kappa…_

She cleared her throat delicately, and both boys looked at her. "Um, should one of us go check on Sasuke-kun?"

Suigetsu smirked. "What? You think that guy can't handle a little pregnant girl? You do remember that he can make electricity spike out from his body like he's a gigantic lightning ball, right?"

Juugo placed his cup down, frowning slightly. "I don't know much about Sasuke's morals…except that the only person he wishes to kill is his brother. However, I don't know if I'm happy with the idea of him hurting a woman with child. I don't enjoy fighting women period, never mind doing so when they're in such a delicate state."

Karin brows furrowed in concentration. "I don't think he would…unless she attacked him."

Suigetsu rolled his eyes. "If she attacks him, then she's a warrior not a woman. If she wants to risk her and her little unborn spawn's life, that's her beef."

Juugo shifted uncomfortably. He _really_ wasn't okay with hurting a _pregnant woman._

"Maybe I should check on them?"

Suigetsu and Karin looked at him surprised. The albino man snickered.

"Well, go on right ahead, I'm not gonna stop you. It'll be entertaining if you come crashing down the stairs anyway."

Juugo stood up, the red head finished off the rest of his tea before setting the cup upside down on his plate.

Karin looked at Juugo worried. True, the teenager could hold himself in battle, but he would be defenseless against Sasuke, whom could control him with his sharingan.

"What will you do if he is hurting her?" She asked.

Juugo only shrugged, and began to walk up the stair case.

* * *

Sasuke pulled Naruto's jacket off, and worked on taking Naruto's shirt off before the orange garment had even hit the floor… As he did so, Naruto continuously pressed his lips against the brunette's pale neck, using his teeth to make marks on the pallid flesh. The blond placed both hands against Sasuke's chest, parting the fabric aside. Sasuke allowed his top garment to slip off of him; the bottom part was still tied to him with his belt. He kissed Naruto against the mouth roughly, and the blonde responded in kind, even biting the bottom of his lip.

Naruto reached in between them to undo the purple belt that was still tied around Sasuke's waist. The white shirt came off, leaving Sasuke's pale chest completely bare. A few seconds later, the brunette managed to work the mesh shirt off of Naruto so they matched.

At the sight of Naruto's flushed face, and heavy panting; Sasuke made a strange feral noise before lifting the blond off of the ground by his thighs and pushing him up against the nearest wall. Naruto twined his arms around Sasuke and allowed the man to kiss him deeply, and added fuel to the fire when he slipped his tongue into Sasuke's mouth.

Sasuke roamed his hands down a tan torso, stopping to unzip his lover's pants. He pulled the black cloth down and over slim thighs impatiently, followed by Naruto's also black underwear. Naruto began to use his legs to try and slip off Sasuke's pants unsuccessfully.

Sasuke smirked against Naruto's lips and kicked them off easily.

"Sasuke?"

"Hn?" Sasuke murmured, distracted by the feeling of his lips against the pulse on Naruto's neck.

He heard an embarrassed tone to the blonde's next question.

"Why aren't you wearing underwear?"

Sasuke felt the side of his mouth twitch into an amused half-smile.

"You ask too many questions, dobe…"

He slipped his hand in between the two of them to cup Naruto's sex. He heard him gasp softly at the sudden pressure and he kissed Naruto on the jaw. His voice dropped to a husky growl as he whispered in the blonde's ear;

"I'll just have to fuck you so hard that you won't be able to speak coherently."

* * *

Juugo wasn't entirely sure of what he was expecting to find when he finally figured out which room Sasuke had gone into. He'd followed the scent to one of the rooms and had listened outside of the door for a moment.

At first he'd heard nothing, and then it sounded like a woman's voice crying out in agony. Instead of barreling in like so many other people would have done, he decided to investigate further. He carefully took a small kunai out of his pocket and picked the cheap lock easily.

Juugo opened the door silently; grateful that the inn owner took good enough care of the establishment to make sure the doors didn't creak. He looked to where the sounds of two different moans were coming from. Had there been a boy with the pregnant girl? Karin hadn't said so…in fact, she'd suspected that the girl had been raped because she didn't have a lover or husband with her.

His eyes widened when he looked to his left and immediately realized he'd been over thinking everything.

Sasuke was naked, and was currently moaning and rocking himself against (_or into…probably into_) a small, blond haired girl while she was held up against the wall by her tan thighs. Her fingernails scratched scarlet trails into Sasuke's pale skin erotically, and that only seemed to spur him on. If the growl like purr he emitted and the way he sped up his movements was any indication.

And though Juugo didn't know much about sex, (in fact he'd never even held hands with a girl, never mind have sex with one.) he could tell from the very least this 'coupling' was completely consensual from both…participants.

The girl was mewling and moaning wantonly as she lifted her hips to meet Sasuke's thrust for thrust, and she even called out his teammate's name.

So…wait. They…knew each other? This wasn't some random rendezvous? Juugo mentally slapped himself. Of course they knew each other. Sasuke had been asking all those specific questions from Karin, he must have recognized her from Karin's description of the girl…Juugo frowned to himself. Sasuke knew the girl was pregnant…yet he was having sex with her anyway. Did that mean that Sasuke…?

Juugo's eyes widened yet again when he realized he had been watching his team leader having sex with some girl for the past five minutes. He flushed (He'd never seen a girl naked either, though Sasuke's body was mostly obstructing her from his view) and silently backed out of the room as he had when he came in.

As he made his way down the stairs, Juugo shook his head in an attempt to clear the image from his head_. Nope. Still there. Goddamit. _

He sat back down with his teammates and ordered some more tea from the waitress passing by.

Karin and Suigetsu looked at him curiously.

"Well," Karin asked. "Is everything okay?"

"Yeah, was he beating her up or what?" Suigetsu added in.

Juugo looked at them blankly for a moment. The scene from one minute ago was crashing into his mind again. _Godfuckingdammit._

"Oh, no. He was just talking to her about something. I think she was a former uh, comrade of his or something.

Suigetsu looked at him curiously. "Didja catch what they were talking about?"

Juugo bit his tongue for a moment as the girl's moans replayed in his head.

_Yeah…talking. Definitely._

"Ah, no. They were talking in code. It sounded like gibberish to me. Sorry."

A waitress came by to give Juugo his tea. He thanked her, and drank it gratefully.

Suigetsu shrugged. "Eh, if it's important I'm sure he'll tell us."

Suigetsu and Karin both looked perplexed as their teammate began to choke on his scalding hot tea.

* * *

Naruto and Sasuke were currently panting lying on the wooden floor; too comfortable in each other's arms and the feeling of the afterglow to notice how hard the surface was.

Naruto's head was tucked under Sasuke's chin, his ear against the left side of his chest. He smiled as he heard the steady beating of his best friend's heart. Said man suddenly tightened his arms around Naruto, and moved one of his legs over the blonde's thighs. They looked like a tangle of limbs, twined together and if it weren't for the difference in skin coloring, it would be difficult to see where one began and ended.

Naruto sighed softly, not in anxiety…but of completion. From the knowledge that he'd just made hot insane love with the man he was in love with, and that they had both known who each other were. Naruto's first time had been very nice, but he'd thought he had been doing it with a stranger. When both of the boys had the knowledge that they were having sex with the person they desired most, it had made their coupling better by ten-fold.

"Dobe."

"Yeah, teme?"

"I'd rather not take you with me."

"Ehh?"

"I will if I have to, but I'd rather you come with me. Of your own will."

"Really."

"Yeah. Really."

Naruto lifted one arm and wrapped it around Sasuke's shoulder.

"I need to go back to Konoha in twenty two months…"

"That's almost two years; we'll figure something out by then."

Naruto closed his eyes, hoping that the image of Sasuke's skin blocked from his mind would help him concentrate. It didn't, of course. Now the feeling of Sasuke's body molded against his own, the sound of his soft breathing, and his salt and leaf smell was heightened.

_Dammit._

They laid together on the floor for ten minutes before Naruto spoke again.

"…Fine. I'll go with you."

He felt Sasuke smirk against his forehead.

"I'm glad."

* * *

Okaaaaay. Hmm….I guess I should explain why Sasuke and Naruto just had sex.

Naruto P.O.V: Even if Naruto is pissed off, and doesn't quite trust Sasuke, he still loves him so much he'd like to vomit hearts on him. The fact that he's a teenager with a healthy libido and in love with Sasuke (whom was point-blank coming on to him.) … makes for a potent combination.

Sasuke P.O.V: Sasuke doesn't know if he wants to kill Naruto or love him…however, the fact that Naruto is carrying his child just tipped the scale toward the 'love him' side. This may seem shallow, but I believe it's been shown that many men believe that one of the times their partners are sexiest are when they're pregnant with their baby. I believe it's supposed to be an instinct mixture of satisfaction and possessiveness.

Satisfied with populating the earth (making babies) and possessive because they've basically claimed that person in every sense of the word. Sasuke does want Naruto…and in a twisted way, loves him. It's just sorta coupled with the desire to eliminate him (which has been seriously oppressed after realizing he'd had sex with him that first time.)

And that is why they had sex.

If you wanna think I'm bullshitting you, that's totally fine.

And lastly, the last time those two got it on was chapter three….I think you guys deserve a little smex cookie for being patient with me, and for the reviews, and for the people who said nice things about my mother.

By the way, she's totally fine now. The incision has healed nicely and is currently shallow, and should be completely healed within a week or less.


	9. I'm Laughing At Me, Not You

Well, I'm very happy you all liked the last chapter so much

Well, I'm very happy you all liked the last chapter so much. I was worried you'd hate it because you'd think the sex scene was just thrown in there for the sake of smut. But…you didn't, so I'm glad .

I haven't put one of these up so…

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own Naruto, or any of the characters.**

Oh. Also, from here on out **my story will be sort of following the cannon story line in Naruto from chapter 354 of Naruto Shippuden and onwards.**

There's a pinch of fluff in this chapter…because someone requested it. And…sure, why the heck not?

Oh, remember whenever someone besides Sasuke or Naruto is talking about Naruto they will refer to him as a 'she'…except for the people who know him. (Sakura, Sai, Kakashi etcetera etcetera…)

* * *

Juugo, Karin and Suigetsu had been sitting at their table for a bout a half hour when Sasuke and a young girl came down the stairs to stand in front of the table.

Karin recognized the blond girl as the pregnant woman she'd seen earlier. What the hell was she doing here? Oh, right…Juugo made it sound like they had been former comrades.

Sasuke sat there for a moment with his hands folded under his chin, in his usual 'relaxed or contemplative' position. The way his ebony eyes seemed to contain a glint something intense as lightning made Karin's heart beat double time.

"I want to talk to you three about something, but it'd be better if we did it away from prying eyes and ears. We'll go up to the room where we're staying."

Karin admittedly felt somewhat ridiculous as her teammates and the blonde girl trooped up the stairs like some miniature, comedic parade. They made quite an exhibition as usual, and the added petite blond didn't help.

They walked along the hallway until they came to the room they had reserved. Sasuke opened the door for the blond girl, and entered after her. Karin raised an eyebrow, since when had Sasuke been…chivalrous? It was actually pretty sexy.

The room they had rented was somewhat larger than some of the other rooms. Understandably so, considering four people were supposed to be sleeping there.

There were three small beds and a slightly large couch. Juugo had insisted Sasuke, Suigetsu and Karin could have the beds because he felt more comfortable when sleeping on hard surfaces. Sasuke had tried to convince him to at least sleep on the couch, but the orange haired boy said he liked the floor better.

Karin sighed to herself. She didn't know who was the bigger freak, Juugo or Suigetsu.

The five teenagers situated themselves accordingly. Sasuke was sitting next to the blond girl on the couch; Juugo was standing against the wall across from them. Suigetsu was sitting on his bed on the left side of the room and Karin was standing next to the door. (she had locked it of course.)

Sasuke leaned his elbows on his knees and rested his chin against his hands as per usual. He looked carefully at his three teammates before speaking.

"Alright, first things first. I need to visit an old family friend before we make any moves. I need to repay her for supporting me and my family for the past years, and while we're there we can stock up on weapons. They don't have ninja's in this village, so of course they didn't have any shinobi accessories. Also, since I'm planning on fighting Itachi, the chance is high that other Akatsuki members may be involved. It's a good idea to get some medicine and a few _miscellaneous_ items while we're there." Sasuke's eyes shifted to the girl beside him, who looked back at him a tad nervously.

Karin piped up from her position by the door. "What's his name, anyone we know?"

Sasuke shook his head a bit. "No, you don't. Her name is Elder Cat. Though to her family she's known as 'Granny Cat', she has a granddaughter about our age if I remember correctly. She's pretty much a hermit, so only my family has ever truly known her. She's a family benefactor of sorts, and has been supplying special weapons for my clan for a long time now. As soon as we're done here, we can go see her."

Suigetsu nodded. "Sounds good, think she'll have more water bottles?"

Karin glared at him. "God, you're such a kappa."

"At least I'm not some creepy stalker ska-"

Sasuke's eyes narrowed, "Suigetsu. Karin. Knock it off."

"S-sorry…" they said in unison.

"Anyway, the second thing is we're having another addition to our group. This is Naruto, she'll be joining us."

A thick silence swept throughout the room. The tension filled void seemed to affect everyone in the room except for Sasuke. A united feeling of disbelief coursed through the other three members of team Hebi.

Karin of course, was the one to speak first. "What?! Sasuke, you can't be serious!! That girl is pregnant; she's going to slow us down! Why would we bring her along, she'll be useless."

Naruto narrowed her eyes at Karin.

"You know…you remind me of a friend of mine. She used to act just like you around Sasuke before she got older and matured …she was _twelve_ when she acted like that. You have the maturity level of a little girl. Wow. How old are you, sixteen?"

The fact that Sasuke didn't tell Naruto to be quiet pissed Karin off. Her face flushed, and she glowered at the small blond.

"What the hell are you talking about? I'm not acting like this because of Sasuke; I'm acting like this because you're going to mess up our dynamics."

"Right. Dynamics. Because you get along just so spectacularly." Naruto replied, looking from Suigetsu to Karin. Suigetsu grinned at Naruto.

"Hey, I think I like her. She's a total spit fire"

Sasuke smirked. "Yes, that's one phrase for it."

Karin continued to glare at Naruto, "Listen you little _bitch_, I-"

"_Karin_."

The red head looked at Sasuke, "What? I'm just saying-"

"Naruto is strong. Her chakra is suppressed right now, but I plan on lifting the seal I put on it. That's why she feels weak to you. True, she's pregnant and in…" he looked at Naruto. "You're two months already?" Naruto nodded, and Sasuke continued "In around five or six moths from now, her condition's going to be too fragile to use chakra, but until then she'll be fine."

Karin laughed nervously. "Sasuke, I still just don't think it's a good idea…"

Sasuke was quiet for a moment before speaking. "Look, the only way I can be sure nothing bad is going to happen to her is if she comes with us."

His teammate fumed at him, her hair color matching her mood. "_Why.Does.It.Matter_?"

"Because she's my lover. And because I got her pregnant."

Once again a thick silence swept across the room, though if one listened closely, they would have heard a cracking noise. This cracking noise was the sound of Karin's sanity snapping like a frozen, dead twig.

"_WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN SHE'S YOUR LOVER_?!"

"Well actually, she's also my best friend. Hmm, how would that go in order? Best friend, lover, mother of my child?" His voice was completely serious and dry when he said this, only infuriating Karin more with the matter-of-fact way he was acting.

"Teme, I don't think you're helping the situation."

Suigetsu was grin almost maniacal. "She kicks major ass, can we keep her?"

The avenger half smirked; "Yes, we are actually."

"_SASUKE?!" _Karin screeched

"Oi teme, you're _really_ not helping."

Juugo sighed, _This won't end well. But I don't care, so long as I don't walk in on Naruto-san and Sasuke going at it again._

* * *

Several hours later, Karin had finally managed to calm down. But since she couldn't beat up Sasuke, Juugo scared her, and even if she _hated her guts_ she wouldn't hurt a pregnant woman, Suigetsu felt the brunt of her rage. Luckily, his body was able to morph into water so he didn't bruise at all.

* * *

Naruto and Sasuke had decided to talk away from the others for a while; they were currently in the room Naruto had rented.

Naruto was sitting on the chair, and Sasuke was standing in front of him. Naruto looked up, irritated.

"Hey, do you think you could sit down or something? You're making me nervous."

"Hn. I'm so imposing that standing in front of you makes you nervous, dobe?"

Naruto sighed and stood up, pushing past Sasuke to walk to the window. It was currently night, but the light from the moon was enough to make the room glow white. Sasuke went over to the blond to stand behind him. He slipped his arms around Naruto's waist and smirked when he felt Naruto lean back against him. Sasuke rested his face against the soft spikes for a moment before speaking.

"I said I'd take the seal off, and I will…but…"

Naruto rolled his eyes. "Sasuke, I'm not going to turn back into a guy. Besides, I need the scroll for that, and it's all the way back in Konoha." He turned around and faced Sasuke, so the brunette could see how serious he was. "I'm not going to kill your baby. If I wanted an abortion, I would have gotten one by now. You know me."

Sasuke's arms tightened around Naruto, pulling the smaller person flush against his body.

"You said…_your_ baby."

"Eh, So? It is, right? What's wrong?"

Pale long fingers carded through Naruto's short hair. "How do you feel about it though? I understand you resenting me for it…but-"

The blond rolled his eyes. "Oh yeah, Sasuke. I just _loathe _and _despise_ the little bundle of joy growing in me." Naruto snorted. "What the hell do you take me for? No I don't hate the baby, are you retarded? I just figure this kid holds more significance and meaning you, than it does to me."

"Hn?"

"Think about it, the whole restoring your family thing, wanting a family again…I shouldn't have to be explaining this to you. I thought revenge and restoring your family was all that's been on your mind for the past six years."

Sasuke looked down at Naruto for a moment. "Well…I've been distracted, understandably so." His hands caressed up and down Naruto's body meaningfully.

"I'm sure your family watching from Heaven is just ecstatic with your dedication and steadfast determination. Speaking of which, if you decide to try killing me on a 'whim' again, your best friend status will be demoted to pen pal. Just an FYI."

Sasuke rolled his eyes. "Moron."

Naruto stuck his tongue out. "Bastard."

They equally traded insults, but both felt as though the usual mean bite to the words had been traded in for mutual affection.

* * *

Several days later the group stood on a road that lead to a large abandoned city that looked sturdy, yet seemed dilapidated and old at the same time.

Suigetsu smirked as they entered through the front,

"This place is a hideout? I'll be damned…"

Sasuke led them through a series of tunnels in the city, pipes raced along the top and sides and occasionally dripped water.

Naruto looked at the brunette next to him, "How long has your clan used this place?"

Sasuke shook his head. "I'm not sure, but I've known her since I was a child…I don't know if her parents helped my clan as well."

Naruto nodded, looking back ahead. Gods, even though the place was completely lit, it was sorta creepy…

Suigetsu's eyes shifted around uneasily, "All the tunnels look the same, I hope we don't get lost."

Karin sniffed a bit with distaste. "The air here is so stifling, It's kinda hard to breath."

"Well, _excuse_ us!" A high pitched voice called from behind them. Everyone except Sasuke turned around, startled at the sudden newcomer.

Sasuke smiled slightly. "Tenka, Hina, how have you two been?"

Naruto's eyes widened at the sight of two cats sitting on the ground. One looked like a combination of a cat, fox and raccoon. The other looked like a regular cat. Both of them donned a kimono top and were grinning. Were they…ninja cats? Like Kakashi's dogs, and ero sennins toads?

"Well, if it ain't Sasuke!" The fox like one purred.

The more feline one mewed, "Whatcha here for?"

Sasuke walked over to them casually, " Weapons, Medicine…" His eyes flicked over to Naruto. "And a few other things…We also need to get ready for a big fight."

They nodded helpfully, but Karin eyed them warily with tired confusion. "These things…"Suigetsu stooped down, extending a hand to them "Talking Tanukis, awesome. Here boy!"

The fox like one yowled threateningly, making Suigetsu jump back in alarm.

Sasuke commented dryly, "They're ninja cats. Don't mess with them unless you want to be a scratching post."

The cats lead Sasuke's group to a room. There, was the strangest looking old woman Naruto had ever seen. It wasn't her face that was peculiar really, but she was wearing a headband that had cat ears attached to it and about a dozen cats surrounded her. Also, her nose was red and her hair fanned out from behind her head in a odd way.

He looked around the room, noticing that it looked very homely compared to the rest of the city. A young girl was on the other side of the room putting what looked like medicinal herbs away in a drawer. She turned to look at them, surprised.

"Oh! We have guests!" She stood up quickly skipping by them "I'll go make tea!"

* * *

Juugo smiled at Granny Cat's granddaughter, Koneko as she handed him a cup of lemon tea. She smiled back and offered some to Naruto who was currently looking at cat painting on the wall. She thanked Koneko as it was handed to her and went pack to looking at the painting. Juugo sighed to himself.

Naruto wasn't looking at the painting though. She looked like she was observing it, but one look at her face and he could tell she was thinking about something heavy.

Juugo's eyes wandered over to Sasuke whom was speaking quietly to Granny Cat, Koneko was offering tea to Karin while Suigetsu toyed with a kitten; letting it bat at his fingers playfully.

He looked back over to Naruto, frowning. She seemed to be in her own world, worrying about something if the way her eyebrows were creased and the lip she was biting was any indication.

He couldn't take it anymore.

Juugo stood up and walked across the room to where Naruto was, and stood there silently for a few minutes. She didn't speak to him, only offering what looked like a forced smile.

His voice was low when he spoke, "Something wrong Naruto-san? You seem tense."

She sighed. "Just the usual pregger stuff. And a few other things…"

"You're worried."

She looked up at him nervously. "Yeah, I'm pregnant. I'm worried. I'm scared. That's normal right? Is it normal to be worried? Or is it just me? Is something wrong with me for being scared and a bit weirded out by all of it?"

His eyebrow rose at her frantic whispers. "I couldn't really tell you. I'm a guy, so I've never been nor ever will be pregnant."

Naruto's eyes widened comically at him before she abruptly burst into unbridled laughter, only laughing harder when she saw Juugo's confused expression.

* * *

Hey guys?! Guess what?! I'm moving in like, seven days!! (cue creepy Samara voice from the Ring) Seven days…So…sorry this chapter is so damn short. I'll make it up to you guys in the next one. Whenever the hell that is. (gets hit by a brick)

Sorry this is so freaking late, but I've been swamped and I've been working on a web comic with my best friend too so…yeahs. Sorry. Thanks for reading! (hugs)


	10. Death Of An Artist

Kay guys, new chapter!

Warnings…uh, very, very OOC Tobi , Sasuke, and Deidara?

Hey, sorry…this chapter is mostly action…yah. This isn't my favorite chapter, mostly because it's a transition to chapter 11 which will actually have the good stuff in it…but meh.

* * *

Karin thought she just might have to kill something if this kept up. As far as Karin could tell, she was easy on the eyes and stuff but she was by no means the most gorgeous girl she'd ever seen. What the hell did Sasuke see in her? She gritted her teeth when she saw Sasuke's hand brush against Naruto ass casually. How many times did he plan on doing that!! Why the hell was everyone in the group absolutely ga-ga over that stupid pregnant blond anyway?! Okay, Suigetsu treated her like some kind of new pet and stuff, but Juugo was all soft around her and crap. Oh, and of course Sasuke could barely keep his eyes or hands off of her.

Karin continued to fume, betting that by the end of the night shed walk in on Naruto, Sasuke, Suigetsu, and Juugo having some weird orgy-fest.

It had been a week since they saw Granny Cat, and Sasuke had said the only way they would find his brother, was if they found out the whereabouts of the Akatsuki.

When they reached the clearing that was in the middle of the forest, Sasuke stopped and walked over to Juugo. He handed him a scroll and a small vile about half the size of his hand.

"If my chakra suddenly disappears…use my blood and that scroll."

Juugo nodded, and looked down at the vile of blood uncertainly; grateful the container was opaque.

Sasuke looked at his three teammates before speaking,

"Alright, Juugo scout around the east. Suigetsu go to the east town, there will be a place there titled as the 'exchange'. The man there is the accountant for the Akatsuki; try to get info from him. Karin go to the south town, the Akatsuki have been known to go there in the past. Naruto and I will scout the north. Get as much information as you can, we'll meet back here in this clearing."

Juugo and Suigetsu nodded before they dispersed, but Karin stayed rooted to the spot. Sasuke looked at her blandly. "Is there a problem Karin?"

She frowned, her eyes trailing to Naruto who was currently looking at a bird's nest that was in a tree. "No, nothing's wrong."

Sasuke blinked. "Then get moving."

She flushed self consciously before turning on her heel and walked south.

* * *

Naruto and Sasuke continued walking north in the forest until they exited it. Naruto looked around for a moment before stating, "There are mountains up ahead, teme. Did you plan on hiking up those as well?"

"Hn."

The blond sighed with pure relief, "Oh, thank Gods."

Sasuke turned to Naruto, actual concern in his eyes. "Are you not feeling well?"

He shook his head. "Mmm, not really...I just really didn't want to do that right now."

Sasuke continued to stare at him, unconvinced.

Naruto rolled his eyes, "I'm fine! The pregnancy book I got taught me how to make a tea that prevents morning sickness and other unpleasant preggy stuff. I made some this morning, so I'm good. I'm almost in the second trimester anyway; book says it should be gone by then."

There was a pause before Sasuke's eyebrow quirked. "You said you made that tea this morning? Was it that red colored tea? The one that smelled like cranberries?"

Naruto frowned, "Uh yeah? Why?"

Sasuke had a weird look on his face. "No reason."

The blond continued to look at his best friend confused before the light bulb went on. He grinned wily, "Oh you had some? Did you like it?"

Sasuke turned away awkwardly, and muttered something to himself.

Naruto poked him impishly, "Hey, it's okay Teme! It's not like it's gonna make you grow breasts or anything. You can have my pregnancy-symptom-reducing tea whenever you like"

Sasuke's voice came out somewhat strangled. "Shut up, dobe."

* * *

Juugo walked along the forest until he spotted a small flock of birds in a tree. He called out to the tiny sparrows, and they flew down from the branches they were perched on and landed upon his shoulders and fingers.

He looked between them thoughtfully, "Well, I suppose I'll start by asking if any of you have seen the Akatsuki."

* * *

Suigetsu made his way towards a small building that had a worn sign that simply said "Exchange". The stairs led down to a door that had a rough looking man guarding it.

He glowered menacingly at the albino, "Who the hell're you?"

Suigetsu's grinned childishly, as he gripped the handle of his sword, "Meh, this one's just a small fry. Sasuke won't care."

Before the guard could reply, Suigetsu whipped the blade out of it's sheath and sliced the man in half in one full movement.

The albino turned from the dead guard and opened the door he had been guarding, slightly surprised it hadn't been locked from the inside.

A man with a cross shaped scar across his fore head was lighting a cigar for his superior. The scarred man looked up and glared at Suigetsu, but before he could take his sword out, Suigetsu dropped the circular hole in his sword through the underling's head and knocked the sword against the wall. The action both knocked the minion out and alson trapped the cigar smoking man against the wall with the semicircle carved in the sword.

Suigetsu leaned over the now quivering man and grinned.

"You work for Akatsuki's Kakuzu as banker and accountant, right?"

The man sweat bullets as he quailed, "I'll tell you anything you want just don't kill me, please!"

Suigetsu's sharp teeth glinted under the light, "Start singing, canary."

* * *

Karin stepped through the crowded street, annoyed. She hadn't found any leads and she'd already been to every inn in the village and had talked to every merchant and store owner.

She sighed with exasperation; maybe she should just go back to the clearing and wait for the others.

* * *

Deidara and Tobi were currently riding on a pair of the artist's flying clay birds. Deidara cussed with annoyance, "Damn I can't believe we were ordered to find those brats, un! We aren't babysitters un!!"

Tobi piped up next to him, "Aw, Deidara sempai! Don't be so mad; think of it as an adventure!"

Deidara closed his eyes, decidedly ignoring his partner. He opened his eyes and looked at Tobi, grinning with triumph. "I found one, un."

The masked youth looked at him in surprise, "Really?! Gosh, that was fast! Which one?"

Deidara only smirked, "Follow me, Tobi."

* * *

Naruto was still teasing Sasuke when they both sensed another chakra nearby. The two teenagers became quiet and tensed.

Sasuke turned in the direction of the forest, "Come out, whoever you are."

Naruto frowned, the Akatsuki were after him for sure, but they thought he was still in Konoha. If they decided to attack and kill Sasuke, was it because they knew he was trying to kill Itachi?

A black figure wearing an orange mask with only one eye hole emerged from the forest. The man (Naruto was assuming it was a man anyway) raised a hand jovially in greeting. "Hey there you two! So are you really Sasuke-kun? You do look like Itachi-san you know? Though I guess that makes since if you are brothers."

Naruto ignored the soft growl from Sasuke, and glared at the masked Akatsuki member. "Who are you, and more importantly what do you want with Sasuke?"

The man took another step toward them, "Why hello there prettyblonde-chan! Say, have we met before?"

Naruto shook his head, confused. "Um, no? I think I'd recognize that mask anywhere…it _is_ bright orange."

Tobi's voice was cheerful, "Like a pumpkin, mm? Say, you know what's funny? Oranges and tangerines are the only fruit that's orange right? But then how come pumpkins don't taste anything like oranges or tangerines?"

Naruto stared at the queer man, completely baffled. "What are you_ talking_ about?"

Sasuke stiffened beside Naruto, and suddenly wrapped an arm around his waist and jumped to the side just before a clay bomb landed on the place they had been standing.

Tobi pouted, "Aw, my distraction tactic didn't work at all Deidara-sempai!"

The artist jumped from his clay bird to the ground , annoyed as hell "Of course it didn't work, un! You were supposed to actually distract them! Why the hell were you talking about fruit, un?!"

"I thought it was a good ice breaker, sempai!"

"TOBI YOU'RE A RETARD!!"

"No, Tobi's a good boy Dei-"

"SHUT THE FUCK UP TOBI!!"

"Aw, sempai…don't be like that!"

"I'LL KILL YOU!!"

* * *

Naruto and Sasuke watched from the sidelines in stunned silence as the two Akatsuki members effectively distracted each other. Sasuke still had Naruto pressed close to him, though they weren't being attacked any more.

Naruto looked on, stupefied. "Um…this may just be my opinion…but after, you know your brother, and all the other Akatsuki I've met…I had the impression Akatsuki members were all sort of…"

"Imposing figures that easily demanded both your complete respect and or fear?" Sasuke answered dully.

"Yeah. And uh, not …"

"Having the attention span of a lobotomized squirrel on drugs?"

"Yep. That's exactly it."

Sasuke looked on as the still yelling Deidara began throwing tiny clay bombs at his partner's feet, making Tobi jump around like a flea. "Hmm…I think they're the crazy cousins that no one likes to talk about in regards to the Akatsuki family."

"What's Itachi?" Naruto asked.

"The psychotic son that likes to mind-fuck people." The brunette deadpanned.

"What's Kisame?"

"The psychotic son's pet fish."

The blond nodded. "Right-O….are we going to attack them?"

"Yeah."

"Plan?"

"Kill the fool, I'll incapacitate the blond and we'll get info from him."

* * *

Deidara turned when he saw something looming toward him in his periphrial vision, and managed to jump away into a tree in time from Sasuke slicing him with his sword. Tobi wasn't as lucky, Naruto sped toward him and plowed a glowing resengan into his gut.

Tobi fell forward, dead on the ground.

Sasuke looked up at Deidara from the ground. "You seem to enjoy talking, so I'll ask _you_ about Itachi."

Naruto heard a shifting noise and started when he saw the man he'd just run though with his hand stand up. The blond eyes widened before narrowing in anger.

"Oh, shit. You aren't all immortal like Hidan, are you? Or do you have multiple hearts like Kakuzu?."

Tobi jumped up and down excitedly "Wow, Wow! You've heard of Kakuzu-san and Hidan-kun, blondie-chan? Well, if you hang around that scary guy, I guess you would mmm?"

Sasuke glared at the Akatsuki member. _Something's wrong…that guy should be dead. I don't care how strong he is...Naruto's resengan is deadly if it hits someone full on._

Tobi skittered farther away from Sasuke, "Damn, that guy is so scary!"

Deidara glowered at his teammate, "Hey Tobi! Don't be stupid and drop your guard, just because they're kids doesn't mean they aren't strong!"

Tobi pouted at his partner. "Darn it sempai, if you really kill Sasuke-kun, I'm gonna have to apologize to Itachi-sama!"

"OH SHUT UP, TOBI!"

The masked Akatsuki turned to Naruto, "Hey, hey blondie-chan!"

Naruto looked at Tobi warily, "Uh what?"

"It's like we're all reversed and stuff!" Tobi gushed.

Naruto frowned in confusion. "What the hell are you going on about _now_?"

Tobi jumped up and down frantically, "Listen, out of the two of us, I'm the cute one and I have black hair but my blonde partner is the scary one, while you're the cute one but you're blond and your partner is the scary one and he has black hair! And it's like we're reversed! Tobi figured that out all by himself!"

A thick, long silence ensued before Deidara decided to get the big guns out.

* * *

The blonde Akatsuki fished his hands in his clay pouches, and made about twenty small sphere shaped bombs. "Tob, stand back!" Deidara masked Akatsuki heeded the warning and fled back towards the forest before the bombs landed.

Unconcerned, Sasuke created his chidori sword and hit the yet to be detonated bombs away from him and his companion; making some of the bombs ricochet back to Deidara. They harmlessly pelted him, but he glared at Sasuke annoyed. _Goddamn, of course he'd be skilled like his freaky-ass brother…_

"DEIDARA-SEMPAI!! BEHIND YOU!!"

The artist turned to see the blond girl armed with a kunai flying towards him from behind.

_When did that girl--?! Shit, that little bastard distracted me when he hit the bombs back at me!_

He quickly formed a bomb and threw it behind his shoulder, detonating it while simultaneously jumping from the tree. He landed easily on the ground, and was extremely irritated to see Sasuke's teammate completely unscathed.

"Waah!! Deidara-sempai, that was close! You shouldn't underestimate them just becaue they're kids you know!"

"OH SHUT THE _FUCK_ UP TOBI!!"

Deidara fell back across the clearing to where Tobi was to ascess the situation better. It was a good thing he'd been using his C1 chakra when he threw the bomb at that girl, otherwise the blast could have killed him instead of propelling him forward as he jumped.

Sasuke glowered at Deidara sword brandished, while the girl now held a kunai in each hand.

"Deidara-sempai?"

The artist stuck his hands in the clay pouches at his waist. "They're too fast…this requires a C2."

There was a large explosive sound, and suddenly most of the clearing was occupied by a large menevolent looking clay dragon.

* * *

Naruto's eyes widened. "Holy shit, I remember this guy from when I saved gaara. I know he could make explosives…but I didn't know he could make them this big!"

Sasuke took one step forward towards Deidara. "You, you know where Itachi is don't you?"

Deidara growled from across the clearing, "I don't give a damn about that cocky brother of yours!! You both are the exact same, you have no respect for my art, and so I will rid you and him from this world!"

The brunette's eyes narrowed, "Tell me where he is, and I'll leave. If you don't, I'll kill you."

The blond Akatsuki grinned. "I'd love to see you try, un!"

Sasuke was quiet for a moment. "Naruto…he isn't going to talk. But he plans to kill me, and you along with me."

The blond turned to his best friend, a slight concern in his eyes that was overridden by his usual determination. "What? You've got an idea? 'Cause I was figuring we were just going to dodge and attack like our lives depended on it."

"No…something better. This person…you said you've seen him work before this?"

Naruto nodded. "Uh, yeah. He detonates them with his chakra…Kakashi saw how it worked with his sharingan."

Sasuke stared at the gigantic bomb figure for a moment. "Dobe, do you think we could force it to explode?"

Naruto frowned. "Um, I suppose…but it'd take a ton of fire power since the bombs are made to detonate at _his_ chakra. I don't think your fire ball technique is enough. Oh, and not to mention the sheer power from that explosion may kill us too, teme."

They watche as Deidara climed on top of the large clay dragon, and it prepared to fly up.

"Naruto, is rasengan wind based?"

"Er, yes…why?"

"What's very interesting…is that I have both lightning and fire based attacks. Lighting is useless against wind…but fire gets extremely stronger when used against wind. Think, like if you fan a fire, it gets bigger right?"

Naruto nodded, not sure where this was going. "Okay, I'm following you."

Sasuke's eyes followed the clay dragon as it took to the air. "What if I used my dragon style fire technique…and you put your rasengan into it…wouldn't that make my fire technique increase tenfold or so…depending on the amount of chakra you put into the rasengan?"

Naruto's eyes widened. "Uhm…yes…but the force of the explosion…wouldn't we be too close? It'd kill us."

Sasuke smirked. "Don't worry about that, I've got it covered."

Naruto frowned a little, not entirely sure what to think about Sasuke's cryptic answer.

* * *

Deidara watched them from above, ready to blow Sasuke and the girl to smithereens. He laughed when he saw them running in the general direction of the bird, the girl had the same glowing orb she'd used to attack Tobi earlier in her hand again.

Sasuke ran in front of her, and she jumped on top of his back right before he sprung high into the air, making a series of hand signs Deidara didn't recognize.

The artist's eyebrow quirked. "What the hell are they doing…?"

Deidara didn't have time to register what was going on as he saw it happen.

Flicks of flames came out of Sasuke's mouth at the same instant the girl pushed the glowing orb in front of her partners face.

The resulting fire ball was to large for words to describe, it engulfed the girl and Sasuke as well as the sky, it easily swallowed Deidara in it's deathly flames before he could react…and the extreme heat caused the bomb to detonate, thusly and effectively ending the life of Deidara, the artist of the Akatsuki.

* * *

Karin looked up in alarm, She turned towards the sound of the inhuman exposion that was taking place in the sky, and then her eyes widened in horror.

She couldn't feel Sasuke's chakra.

* * *

Suigetsu was running towards the forest, to meet up with the others at the forest clearing. When the sudden absence of his leader's chakra became apparent, he triple folded his speed, gritting his teeth from worry.

* * *

Juugo looked up from where he was to see the sky filled with fire. He knew that was coming from the north where Sasuke, and Naruto-san were. The red head felt sick when he realized he couldn't feel either's chakra.

* * *

Suigetsu, Karin, and Juugo all met in the clearing that was now seared from where the midair explosion had managed to hit.

Karin bit her lip and there was a tremor in her voice. "You don't think…do you?"

Suigetsu looked around them hopelessly, "I dunno…it doesn't look good."

Juugo was silent for a moment before he remembered the scroll and vile Sasuke had given him. Quickly, he kneeled down on the ground and un rolled the scoll. At the center, there was a blank circle with writing and symbols around it.

Karin frowned. "Is that a sealing scroll?"

The albino next to her suddenly grinned. "Ho, shit!! That's a summoning scroll! Juugo, pour the blood in the circle and then press your hand in the center! Now!"

Juugo complied, and the three cried out when a sudden giant violet and black snake with golden eyes appeared before them.

It's body was charred , and still smoking. It glared at the three teenagers with dying eyes.

Suigetsu's eyes widened. "That…that's Manda! He was Orochimaru's summon, how the hell did Sasuke get control of him?"

The titanic snake rasped, "It was that brat…he used his eyes…hypnotized me…controlled me…"The snake's eyes lost their glinting light as it passed away.

Karin shook her head, "I don't understand…"

"I summoned Manda at the last second to protect us from the explosion…though we still got burned."

The team looked with shock as an exhausted Sasuke being supported by Naruto came out from behind the snake. They both had red burns on their arms and faces.

Sasuke shoulders and back were burned from when he had turned to protect Naruto from the explosion, the skin was red and shining from the blood underneath. The left cheek on Naruto's face was red as well, black at the edges where the skin met burn. Their clothes were a mess to say the least, and they smelled like they had been rolling around in a campfire.

They basically looked like hell.

"Unfortunately," Sasuke continued, " it took a hell out of me. He was a really powerful summon, and I forced genjutsu on him"

Naruto looked down concerned, "We should find some place to rest. We can talk about any information you three managed to gather once we're settled."

Karin looked like she was about to object -mostly from being ordered around by their newest member- but Sasuke nodded his consent and then fell unconscious.

Well, it was certainly obvious to the team who Sasuke's right hand was.

* * *

Okie Dokie, everyone. I've been getting questions, but I haven't been giving any answers. I'll read off the most common (or interesting) questions I've got going from your reviews.

**Q. Are you going to update soon? **

A. I just moved to an apartment, and in January I'm moving again…I'll try to update at least once a month.

**Q. Will Naruto ever be a boy again? It's not really yaoi if he's a girl forever!**

A. Yes! I promise Naruto will be back to his regular boy self before the story is over, and when he is, I'll write a nice smut scene for those of you who have been waiting for them to have sex as guys.

**Q. OMG!! Is Sai in love with Naruto?!**

A. Sai has a hard time with emotions, he's just now beginning to feel them and they can be sorta overwhelming. Kinda like when your eyes are in the dark and then see something bright, it hurts right? Sai isn't in love with Naruto, but Naruto is currently Sai's most "precious person". As such, he gets really confused whenever Naruto is around and his blooming emotions go crazy, which makes him sorta messed up. I don't think Sai will be able to actually "fall in love" with anyone for a long time. But he cares for Naruto greatly, even if he doesn't really realize it yet.

**Q. Won't having Naruto come with them endanger him even more than if he stayed being hidden in a remote village? After all Sasuke is looking for Itachi and the Akatsuki want Naruto.**

A. Sasuke is rather obsessive and possessive of Naruto right now. It doesn't help that Naruto is currently pregnant with his child. Logically, yes, Naruto should stay in the isolated village with maybe Juugo to protect him or something along that line. But, Sasuke isn't totally logical when it comes to Naruto, and just wants to be near him as much as possible. So, Sasuke is just love-stupid for Naruto.

**Q. What about the people in Konoha?**

A. Tsunade told Naruto's team he's on training leave with Jiraiya, so they aren't wondering where he is or anything, and even Tsunade thinks he's on training leave.

**Q. If Sasuke breaks the seal so Naruto gets his chakra back will he be able to turn back into a boy or will he stay a girl because of the baby?**

A. No, Naruto needs the actual scroll to turn back into a boy…and the scroll is back in Konoha. Sasuke is only lifting the seal that will give Naruto back the ability to use his chakra so he can defend himself. In other words, he can now use resengan and stuff, but only sparingly because of the baby. Even if he could turn back into a boy, he wouldn't because boys don't have a uterus. If he did anyway, the baby would no longer be connected to his body even though it would be inside of him. In short, the baby would die.

**Q. How many babies will Naruto have?**

A. As of now, I'm not entirely sure…I'll think about it more.

**Q. It feels weird if you have Sasuke falling in love with female Naruto, and then Naruto changes back into a male.**

A. Okay, this isn't really a question but I'll 'answer' it anyway. To Sasuke, Naruto is Naruto. Boy, girl, polka dotted or whatever. It doesn't matter to him as long as it's Naruto.

**Q.I think Sasuke deserves to be slapped. I mean, putting Naru through pregnancy? **

A. Don't worry, Naruto is secretly plotting his mini revenge that he will exact upon Sasuke once his isn't pregnant and a girl anymore.

**Q. CLIFFHANGER?! Not cool, not cool! Meanie doo-face.**

A. Sorry, Sorry! I hate reading a story with cliffhangers too, but I love writing them in. Always leave them wanting more~ (evil smirk)

Okay, there are the answers to (I think) all of your questions in general. If you have any that weren't listed and answered here, put them in you review, m'kay? Thanks for reading again~!

**And about the Sasuke drinking the tea**…it's kind of equivalent to a guy accidentally taking Midol…or birth control.

That happened to a guy friend, he had a headache so one of his friends (who was a girl) gave him some Midol, when he found out he sorta freaked. Thought he was gonna grow breasts or something.


	11. A Martyr Against The Twilight

Okay peoples…up until Sasuke's big battle, the manga won't be canon for a while. Why? Well, in canon, Naruto and a group of other ninja from the leaf are looking for Sasuke…and team Hebi go on the move to find Itachi…and that obviously doesn't work here. So…there will be a mix of my story and the canon in here. Yosh. HURRAY FOR CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT AND SEX!!!

And for more description on Sasuke and Naruto's injuries, go back one chapter and read the paragraph where Sasuke and Naruto come out of manda.

**

* * *

**Seven hours after the victory over Deidara, team Hebi were currently staying at another inn. As far as their lodgings went, the room was much more simple from their last one.

The large room's floor was covered in only tatami mats, and the walls were painted with a stencil of grey lines made to resemble clouds.

Sasuke was currently lying on his stomach on the only futon in the room. He was naked from the waist up, and Naruto was currently applying a cold burn relief compress to his back, he planned to put a salve he had bought from the pharmacy on Sasuke's burns later.

Sasuke hissed at the sudden cold against his pain, and Naruto smiled at him in apology.

As for him, Naruto had a bandage on the side of his face, even though the burns on his body had mostly healed already. Having Kyuubi inside of him was a bitch, but at least he could heal very quickly. The raw red burns on Sasuke's back and shoulders looked like they hurt like a bitch.

The avenger was resting his head on his folded arms as he looked at the rest of his team. Juugo was sitting against the wall under the open window in the room, Suigetsu was sitting on the floor, and Karin was glaring at Sasuke with her arms crossed.

"Did anyone get any leads on Itachi?" Sasuke asked.

Naruto sighed with aggravation while Karin growled. "That is the very last thing you should be thinking about right now!"

Suigetsu chose to ignore her and replied, "That guy told me a lot about the organization, but nothing specific on Itachi. They are apparently after people who can be perceived as 'special'. Having unique chakra, abilities, or techniques."

A bird flew to Juugo's shoulder as he spoke with his piece, "The animals told me that the Akatsuki operate out of several different bases. They told me that they don't like the chakra coming from those places…"

Sasuke nodded to the best of his ability, "Alright….perhaps they or Karin could lead us to one."

Suigetsu grinned. "Wow, never thought that stupid animals could sense chakra. But then again, 'stupid animal' describes Karin perfectly so…"

The albino was unable to finish his sentence because Karin kicked him hard in the face as she screamed "GODS, YOU'RE AN ASSHOLE!!"

Juugo watched the exchange with trouble in his features, his hands beginning to shake. The bird that had been resting on his shoulder flew off in fright.

Naruto rolled his eyes, and placed a compress on the back of Sasuke's shoulders.

"God, they act like they're stupid in love or something."

Sasuke raised an eyebrow.

Naruto huffed before he continued. "It's like how little kids pick on each other all the time because they secretly like each other.…look at how we acted when we were younger. Jeez."

The brunette closed his eyes as the cold patch soothed the pain of his burns away.

"No, I think they just can't honestly stand each other."

Naruto was quiet as he watched Karin kick the crap out of Suigetsu.

"…Fifty says they get married some day."

Sasuke smirked, "One hundred says Karin locks him in a freezer some day."

Naruto snorted at the mental image of Suigetsu as a life size Popsicle.

Juugo suddenly moaned and doubled over, his entire body shaking with pent up energy.

Naruto stood up, concerned. "Hey, Juugo are you alright? You look kinda-"

Karin and Suigetsu stopped fighting and stared intensely at Juugo before they realized what was happening. The albino cried out, "Oh shit! He's losing it again!!"

Juugo made a screaming garbled yell before growling_**, "I wanna kill something…anyone will do…"**_

Naruto's eyes widened at the sudden transformation the usually docile Juugo had gone through. He recognized the violet black design that shifted across Juugo's face and shoulders; it looked so similar to the design that would overcome Sasuke's body whenever Orochimaru's seal broke free.

Naruto backed away instinctively, " What the hell does he mean 'again'…?"

Juugo turned breathing hard, and his eyes locked on Naruto. He grinned in a demented way at the blonde _**"You'll do fine**_" he rasped.

Naruto felt a shiver go up his spine when Juugo suddenly charged towards him. Reflexively, Naruto gripped a kunai in his hand, the metal giving him a comfort that he could protect himself. He didn't need to use it though, for both Suigetsu and Karin grabbed Juugo and restrained him from trying to kill the blond.

Sasuke struggled, but managed to sit up and calmly look into Juugo's eyes with his sharingan. "Juugo, settle down."

Naruto watched with wonder as Juugo's malicious features sifted back to his softer ones once again. His brown eyes returned and the violet black markings disappeared along with his killing intent.

The entire ordeal from Juugo changing to Sasuke changing him back had only taken thirty seconds.

Suigetsu and Karin released him, and Juugo collapsed to the floor. He was breathing hard and beads of sweat dotted his forehead. He looked up at Naruto (Who was understandably confused at the moment.) "Oh Gods…" Juugo staggered up and away from Naruto. "I'm…I'm so. I could have k-killed you. And you're pregnant."

Sasuke sighed. "Juugo, it's alright…" He glared darkly at Karin and Suigetsu who looked back nervously. "If anything, it's those twos faults for getting violent and subsequently riling you up."

Juugo shook his head and muttered, "No…um, I'll be back…in a while." He looked back at Naruto with regret on his face before awkwardly leaving the room in haste.

Sasuke watched Juugo walk out before turning to glower at Suigetsu and Karin. "You two need to-" The brunette paused when he felt a hand on his head.

Naruto grinned down at him. "Hey, I'll go after him 'kay?"

**

* * *

  
**

Juugo was standing outside of the inn, he was leaning against a tree and staring at the ground with an expression akin to a person regretting just kicking a kitten in the face.

Naruto walked over and smiled, "Hey Juugo."

The red head looked up, frowning at the girl before backing away from her. "I'm sorry…I'm really sorry….I swear I didn't mean to. I don't like to hurt people…especially women…and a, a _pregnant_ woman."

Naruto stared at him for a moment. "I've seen similar markings to yours on Sasuke. Did Orochimaru put the curse seal on you as well?"

Juugo was surprised she'd ignored his apology but shook his head in answer to her question. "No. Orochimaru _got_ the seal from me. I'm the original. He took the enzyme from my body, and used it on ninja's to induce them in a similar killing state that I was just in. That's what the curse seal is…the same seal that's on Sasuke."

Her pretty blue eyes widened. "So, you were already like that?"

The red head sighed. "Originally, I went to Orochimaru because I wanted a cure for it…but instead he took what made my sickness and made it into a weapon. I don't want to hurt people! And I really don't want to kill them…but this thing inside me, it makes me lose control. That's why I liked Kimimaro…he could control me, and keep the killing instinct at bay. He's gone, but Sasuke is able to calm me down with his Sharingan."

The blond walked over and leaned against the tree next to Juugo. "You and I…aren't so different, I think. When I get really upset…something takes over me and I can't see straight. I nearly killed my teacher because of it…and I felt horrible when I found out _I_ was the one who injure him so badly. But, I didn't _want_ to harm him. And like you, I don't like hurting people, but I will if it means protecting my friends. I'm glad you tried to attack me. If you hadn't, I probably wouldn't have known this about you." She grinned up at Juugo, "I think we're going to be good friends."

Juugo stared down in shock at Naruto, wondering just what kind woman Sasuke had gotten for himself.

**

* * *

  
**

It was about two months later, and Team Hebi had since moved to another and better furnished inn room. Sasuke's burns were completely healed, they had settled into shining pink scars that oddly, were fading day by day. Suigetsu pointed this out and Sasuke shrugged and guessed it was because of the power he had absorbed from Orochimaru.

Karin was currently in town, getting some food supplies so they would be prepared to head out. Suigetsu had gone off to restock his water bottles, and Juugo was presently outside of the inn, sitting under a tree.

Naruto was just getting out of the shower back at their inn room when he felt something strange. He frowned and rested a hand on his stomach when he felt it again. The blonde's eyes widened and he grinned.

_Sweet._

**

* * *

**To say Sasuke was pleased when his naked and warm and wet dobe walked over and sat down in his lap was the understatement of the century. Automatically, he wrapped his arms around the wet blonde and brought him closer; ignoring the water bleeding into his clothes.

"This is-" He kissed along Naruto's neck and ran his hands down wet tan thighs "a pleasant surprise." He saw Naruto grin, "Oh I'm glad, because then you're going to _love_ this."

Sasuke looked at Naruto curiously when the blonde took his hand and drew down to his lower abdomen. In the past month or so, Naruto had developed a swell on his lower stomach that had gotten bigger, but small enough to hide under his current clothes. Sasuke already knew this so was confused as to why Naruto was- He stopped thinking and looked down. And then he felt it again, soft fluttering taps that would start and stop randomly.

Naruto smiled when he saw Sasuke's black eyes widen in shock. "That's you baby moving, teme. Pretty cool, huh?" Sasuke looked up at Naruto, who shivered when a slight breeze came through the open window and chilled his wet skin. The brunette smirked, "Naruto…if you aren't careful you'll catch your death of cold…" He pulled the blonde tighter against him, "Let me warm you up."

Sasuke kissed Naruto on the mouth, and the blonde moaned and leaned into the kiss when the brunette's tongue delved into Naruto's mouth. Sasuke took off the white kimono top he always wore and put it around Naruto's shoulders to protect him from the cold. Naruto smiled against Sasuke's neck, "Tch, such a gentlemen teme…" Sasuke smirked as he kissed Naruto's face, "Only for you, dobe." Naruto wrapped his arms around Sasuke's neck and rolled his hips against the hardening bump he could feel in Sasuke's lap. The man moaned lowly and kissed Naruto more aggressively, making the blonde grin at the affect he had on Sasuke.

Naruto reached down and untied Sasuke's pants, casually throwing the thick rope tie behind him on the ground. Sasuke was about to let his erection out of his pants when he paused and his eyes drifted to the baby bump on Naruto. "Will this hurt it?" Naruto grinned and shook his head, "No, I read that sex is possible throughout all stages of pregnancy, you won't hurt it-promise." Sasuke nodded and kissed Naruto on the mouth as he took his length out of his pants.

The blonde put his hands on Sasuke's shoulders so he could support himself as he slid down onto Sasuke's shaft. Naruto panted into Sasuke's neck once he was filled completely, moaning when the brunet bucked his hips upward into Naruto.

The one thing that was nice about female bodies was they were designed for sex so little to no preparation was required and the natural lubrication was already there once the girl herself was stimulated.

Naruto gasped and rocked back on Sasuke, who tightened his arms around the blonde and panted at the noises the blonde was making in his ear.

**

* * *

**

Juugo had decided he'd gotten enough sun and decided to go back into their inn room. He walked onto the porch and slid open the door to walk inside.

He stopped in his tracks.

Sasuke was sitting on a chair by the mini table in their room; And Naruto (who was naked save for the white kimono top draped around her shoulders) was sitting in his lap as Sasuke fucked her. Their pace seemed to be getting faster and Sasuke moved his hands down to grab Naruto's hips to move her along with the quickening rhythm. The pretty blonde emitted a low mewl and panted harder, moving with the new pace Sasuke had set. She kissed and bit his pale neck making him throw back his head and moan deeply and suddenly held her tight as she moaned loudly.

Juugo quickly backed out and slid the door shut softy before running away from the inn back to the safety of his tree. Why the hell did he keep walking on them doing _it_?!

**

* * *

  
**

_It's dark. It's very warm. I feel safe._

_I'm a little sleepy. I'm a little cramped though-maybe if I move- there. Sleepy time for me._

**

* * *

  
**

Four members of the Akatsuki were standing atop the fingers of the stone hands in their jinchūriki extraction base. It was dark as usual and the only members that were physically present were Kisame and Itachi the other two, Zetsu and Pein were holograms.

Zetsu's voice was devoid of emotion as he said, " Deidara is dead, and he went out with a bang."

Kisame sighed, "Ah, so we've lost another member…" Itachi looked down with an unrecognizable expression on his face. Zetsu nodded than said, "Sasuke and one of his teammates died as well, it was a very large explosion."

Pein was quietly reflecting for a moment before he said, "Deidara's death was a loss…but at least Itachi's troublesome brother was destroyed. He was bound to cause us some trouble."

Zetsu was silent for a minute before adding, "I can't find Tobi anywhere…he must have died along with Deidara in that huge explosion."

Pein shrugged, "Tobi was fairly average in regards of ability, he was best at running away and being cheerful. Deidara was special though." He made a teleportation hand sign, "I'm leaving. You should mourn for Deidara" Pein said before disappearing.

Kisame looked at Itachi curiously after Zetsu left as well. "You're the sole survivor of the Uchiha clan now, Itachi. Are you sad?"

Itachi was silent before he looked up at the nine eyed statue carved into the cave wall.

"My brother is not dead."

**

* * *

  
**

Pein was sitting atop a stone and metal tower, overlooking the twisted and elaborate iron city under him with a blank expression. He wondered how long the city would survive fore after humans had left the earth and all that remained was oblivion and time. The towers around him were tall yet some how not magestic at all, but rather clunky and somewhat precarious looking. He looked at how the phone lines connected each tower to the other, creating a intricate web like city.

Pein stopped his pondering as he sensed his partners presence behind him and heard her soft voice, "Nagato, come here. He has arrived."

The red head stood up and looked at the beautiful woman in front of him. She looked back at him with void eyes before gesturing to the opening in the tower behind her. As he walked past Konan he trailed one of his fingers across the back of her hand, a rare show of his fondness for her.

He was in a rather sentimental mood for some reason.

A man with his back facing him stood in front of Pein. The man was looking out a window at the twisted city.

Pein asked, "What's happened with Sasuke? He's not dead."

He could hear the pride in the man's voice, "No. His Sharingan's power is developing exquisitely, he will without a doubt surpass and kill Itachi. It won't be long."

Pein nodded, "Shall I go after the Jinchūriki Naruto? He's the only one we need…except for the eight tailed beast."

There was a long pause, and Pein waited patiently though he wondered why his leader was taking so long- the answer should be obvious.

"You will not be able to find him."

Pein bristled and his voice was like ice. "Are you questioning my abilities to find an _adolescent boy_?" He felt a slim hand press against the small of his back and the red head knew Konan was trying to get him to calm down.

His leader shook his head "Naruto had grown…quite a bit. He is no longer a helpless boy-child. He has learned formidable techniques and unique abilities. He has aided in the destruction of Hidan, Kakuzu, and now Deidara." His master finally answered.

Konan looked unimpressed. "There is no reason to describe him with such disturbing names…and what do you mean he aided in the destruction of Deidara? Uzumaki Naruto has been stationed in Konoha since his return from Sunagakure."

Their hooded master walked past them and to the opening Pein had emerged from, unfazed when rain began to fall and a storm bloomed over head. He turned back to his two subordinates, the wind blew back his hood and he looked at them with one eye from behind his orange mask.

It was not Tobi's cheerful voice that was heard from behind the mask, but a deep voice that resonated into the two adults behind him. He now spoke as Madara, and looked at his underlings with a hint of amusement in his one visible eye.

"It would appear that my darling descendent has decided to become intimately involved with the Jinchūriki Namikaze-Uzumaki Naruto. I am…interested in seeing how this will play out for myself. Until then, go after the eight tailed beast…soon our goals will be achieved."

Madara formally Tobi walked out to the ledge Pein had been sitting from and jumped off of the tower onto the rain slicked street one hundred feet below.

Konan frowned as she turned to Pein, "I still don't understand, Nagato."

Pein looked away from the place Madara had leaped from and walked back to Konan.

"I don't either…but I have a sense that things are going to change drastically soon."

**

* * *

  
**

**One week later**

Sasuke finished putting his cloak over his sleeveless kimono and turned to his comrades and lover. "All right, I think we should get a move on. Naruto, you've got the map with all the locations the birds told Juugo right?" The blonde grinned and pulled the map out from her cloak as proof before putting it back in her pocket.

Sasuke turned to look at the sky. "We've got about six hours of light left, so let's get moving. Naruto, how many bases were marked on the map?"

"Forty two." The blonde answered somewhat warily.

There was a very long silence.

"Holy Fuck!" Karin exclaimed, "How long is it going to take to find every single one of those?!"

Juugo was silent. "Maybe a year?"

She glared at him, "That was rhetorical!"

Suigetsu laughed, "Well…I guess we should get started then shouldn't we?"

Karin held a hand up, "Wait one second. What if Itachi knows we're following him and just randomly jumpS from base to base to avoid us?"

Another silence.

Naruto thought a moment. "Maybe he won't avoid us if we've got some bait to dangle his way."

Sasuke looked alarmed but Suigetsu asked curiously, "Bait? Are you talking about Sasuke? Itachi's gonna stay away from the guy trying to kill him Naru-chan."

Naruto shook his head and pointed at herself. "I was talking about me."

Sasuke growled, "_Absolutely fucking __**not**_." His teammates froze in surprise, they'd never heard Sasuke curse in such a way, let alone with such a hard voice before. Naruto only rolled her eyes, "Teme, it's the best way. He's after me, and-"

The avenger walked over and grabbed Naruto by the arms and turned the blonde to face him. "I said no. I want to destroy Itachi, believe me…but if you think I'm going to risk you getting whisked away-"

Naruto sighed and frowned, running a hand through her short spiky hair "Yes, I know. Your baby would die if I died too, teme. What the hell do you take me for? It's not like I'd actually put myself in any _real_ danger."

Sasuke stared hard into Naruto's blue eyes. "I wouldn't be in despair over _only_ the baby Naruto. Or have you not realized that yet?"

The blonde's eyes widened in surprise and the two lovers gazed in each other's eyes, both understanding the mutual feelings of affection and ardor they held for each other.

Juugo blushed, Somehow he felt this situation was even more intimate than the lovemaking session he'd walked into last week. If the mortified expression on Karin's face and the embarrassed one on Suigetsu's was any indication, they both felt the same awkwardness as him right now.

He was amazed how those two could just stare into each others eyes like that, he always got shy when people looked him in the eyes for too long. He coughed into his fist subtlety but it worked. Naruto's gaze dropped to Sasuke's cloaked chest and the brunette looked at his three teammates. "Forty two bases…I suppose we'll just have to go to the closest one first."

Suigetsu thought a moment. "What if we split up? Naru-chan and Juugo could mark another map right?"

Naruto looked up from Sasuke's chest and to the albino. "But aren't the Akatsuki after you guys and Sasuke? I mean, Deidara outright attacked him."

Juugo frowned, "That's true…they know we're helping Sasuke-kun go after Itachi-san."

Sasuke closed his eyes for a moment before deciding, "I don't want any casualties, and staying together would be best for the moment. Naruto and I killed Deidara, and it's possible the Akatsuki are after us all the more for that. We'll remain together, and perhaps later we could split up."

His three teammates nodded and the brunette felt Naruto squeeze Sasuke's hands in reassurance. It was strange how the simplest gestures of his teammates and lover made him feel so secure.

**

* * *

  
**

Itachi stared out at the expanse of land in front of him in silence. He heard Kisame come up behind him and his partner asked, "What are you thinking about? Sometimes I seriously can't tell with you…even though we've been partners since you first joined the Akatsuki."

Itachi turned to his partner and in a low voice replied, "I need to separate from you for a while…there is someone I need to see. It's a private matter, I hope you understand."

Kisame shrugged and grinned, "Yeah, sure. Not like I haven't gone off on my own from time to time."

Itachi nodded and walked away from his comrade, Kisame watched his partner's receding silhouette against the setting sun and couldn't help but feel that Itachi looked like a martyr character from the epic stories his parents used to tell him when he was a child.

* * *

Question and Answer time whoo-hooo!! Looks like I answered a lot of what you guys were wondering, because I didn't get as many this time…however…I have something I need to say:

**I am really, truly, sorry…for writing Deidara and Tobi so **_**insanely**_** out of character!**

But God, the temptation… I could have made the fight between Naruto, Sasuke, and Deidara extremely serious…in fact when I first planned the story in my head that was the climax….but in the actual version, it of course couldn't be the climax because then the story would end far too quickly!

I love Deidara and Tobi's relationship, how Dei is the straight man and Tobi is the spazz.

I just wanted to make the chapter fun, even though I sorta slaughtered their personalities in the process.

Originally, I had Deidara win. And Sasuke nearly dies…and Naruto nearly dies and loses the baby. I really didn't like that. I wanted Naruto's baby to live, and I wanted to follow the manga in a more canon way. (As canon as a fanfic can be, anyway.)

So, I made the fight scene go faster…other wise I'd be writing it for four chapters…which is ridiculous. Damn you Kishimoto and your epic battle scenes…

I'm just going to nip this in the bud…best answer these questions now...

**SPOILERS FOR NARUTO MANGA CHAPTERS**

**Nagato/ Pein?! WTF BBQ?!**

Nagato is Pein's actual name, though the only one who calls him by it is Konan since they've been together since they were children.

**Tobi/ Madara?!**

If you've been reading the recent manga…you'd know that they're the same person. Tobi is a guise Madara uses and Madara is the ancestor of the Uchiha clan.

And yes, he knows Naruto is a girly and that he's with Sasuke…obviously.


	12. You Can't Bend My Will

Um. Hi. Yeah….I know I suck. We moved to Washington successfully (yays). And then I had to get my hard drive wiped three times because of a virus. And then my mother had to have ANOTHER fucking surgery. Sorry…I promise I'll finish this fanfic.

HOOOOOLY SHIT! Since when did I have over 500 reviews?! I thought I only had 300! Jeez. Thanks, guys. I didn't know this story was _that_ good.

Diclaimer: I don't own Naruto. Kishimoto does. But if I did own Naruto…so, so many things would happen that would make _all_ of Kishimoto's diehard hetero fans cry themselves to sleep at night. Forever. XD

**

* * *

**

"Who the hell are _you_?!"

Before Naruto could come up with a fake alibi, the guard made some hand motions and summoned four gray wolves, each of which had a black bandana wrapped around their necks with the red Akatsuki clouds emblazoned on them. The blonde glared at the guard bitterly. _Oh, this is just fan-fucking-tastic._

Naruto wished the guard hadn't summoned the growling animals; they reminded him of how Kakashi had his own pack of summoning dogs. He didn't want to kill them, but he would if it meant sparing his life_._ Before he could blink, one of the wolves leaped out at him. Naruto managed to dodge the wolf that growled at Naruto for making him miss.

_Oh, I'm sorry for moving. Next time I'll just let you rip out my throat. Would that make you happy, wolfy-loofy?Yes it would, oh yesh it wouldy-poody._

He didn't want to use the rasengan, it took to much energy in his state. Naruto glared and summoned five clones. "Go for the guard!" He ordered them, just in time for the other three wolves to leap to attack them. Naruto winced as one clone took a vicious bite to the throat and his 'death' fell into Naruto's memory.

One of the clones glared and threw a kunai, either the guard thought it would miss or he just didn't see it, Naruto didn't know (or care to be honest) but the kunai went straight into the man's left eye, and he emitted a shrieking yell. That was just annoying, he wasn't freaking dead! Naruto gasped when he felt a sudden movement in his stomach. The blond put an arm across his belly, and tried to will the life to relax. _Baby, please…I'm in the middle of a fight right now, I'm sorry if my stress is making you uncomfortable, but please just stop moving so I can concentrate._

The sound of breaking concrete resounded behind Naruto and he turned to see Juugo emerge from the rubble. He was partially transformed, and one of his fists was seven times larger than it normally was. The red head looked at him frantically, "Naruto-chan! Are you alright?!"

The blonde smiled at the worried man, "I'm fine Juugo."

The wolves snarled and growled, approaching the two. Juugo sighed. "Sorry about this guys." He then swept his massive hand out, and managed to hit all four wolves hard enough that they flew into the wall, knocked unconscious. Juugo glowered at the guard.

"Attacking a pregnant woman, you're the absolute worst…"

The bleeding man spat in their general direction, and Naruto had to admire the man for putting up a tough front with a blade still sticking out of one of his eyes. "Peh, she's not a woman to me. If she's fighting, then she's a warrior. If she didn't want to risk her brat dying she shouldn't be putting herself in combat and sneaking into places she knows she doesn't belong!"

Juugo growled, and Naruto widened his eyes in surprise at the sound. It was the noise an animal would make, not a person. To be honest, it was a _touch_ unnerving. He put a hand on Juugo's forearm to get his attention. "Hey, let's get out of here. I don't think Itachi's here. I've questioned four guards before I got to this guy. Where are the others?"

Juugo didn't answer at first. Instead he crouched down and with his currently normal sized hand, he picked up one of the pieces of broken concrete wall and lobbed it at the guard's head, rendering the man immediately unconscious upon hitting him. "They've searched too." Juugo finally said "They couldn't find him and all the guards they…interrogated said that the actual members of the Akatsuki never come here. This base is just for their followers to keep an eye out for any Akatsuki enemies or those demon spirits."

"You mean the Jinchūriki?"

"Mmhmm. I think that's what they're called. Do you know about them?"

"Uhm…later. We should regroup with the others."

Juugo nodded and picked Naruto up with his mutated arm. The blonde fidgeted, "Juugo, it's nice of you and stuff…but I can walk on my own." The redhead shook his head. "Naruto-chan…I don't think it's a good idea for you to fight anymore." Juugo flushed a little, "I mean…I know it's not my place or anything to say but…you've gotten um…bigger in the stomach in these past few months, and your chakra has been getting lower and lower. Shinobi or not, you really shouldn't be fighting."

Naruto groaned, but let Juugo carry him. "You're starting to sound like Sasuke. Lately, he's been bugging the crap out of me about it. It's only a matter of time until he ties me to a tree or something for gods' sake."

Juugo sighed, "He's right though. I know it annoys you because you're so independent but…if you aren't careful, you could end up getting hurt badly enough that you'd lose the baby."

The blonde smiled at the mild mannered man. "Yes, I know…I'll be more careful."

Juugo gently squeezed Naruto as he carried the blond over the rubble. "Please be safe."

**

* * *

**

Sasuke looked tense, and Suigetsu was secretly making bets to himself how long it would take until his leader lost it and started killing small woodland animals to vent his frustration. Their team had split up in the gigantic hideout, Karin, Suigetsu and Sasuke had interrogated several guards and when they realized they had no leads, had then met up in a wood clearing. Juugo and Naruto were originally together but had gotten split up in the chaos when many (very well trained) shinobi attacked them.

Sasuke of course didn't know about this until Suigetsu saw Juugo on his own while they were raiding the hideout and relayed the information to their leader once he was in the clearing with him. And so…the Uchiha seemed to be just a tidbit irritated… (understatement…huuuuge understatement) One, because there was no information about Itachi there, or any of the Akatsuki at all and also…

Juugo and Naruto hadn't shown up yet.

Sasuke wasn't pacing but he was quietly seething on the spot. "Okay. That's it." He suddenly announced in a low voice, "We're going to go back…and I'll turn that stupid place inside out if I have to."

Suigetsu noticed Karin biting her lip and he could tell she was fighting with herself. Half of her probably wanted to try to convince Sasuke to just leave his lover and Juugo behind and the other half knew it was a lost cause to even attempt such a thing.

Suigetsu shrugged. "Alright, I'll go with you though it's kinda pointless considering that lately you've been so powerful you're like an army of one…"

Sasuke frowned."No, I think you should stay here with Karin on the off chance that they come-"

There was a rustle from the trees and Juugo suddenly dropped down from above, carrying a pregnant Naruto in his arms. (_Speak of the Devil_, Suigetsu thought)

"Sorry!" Juugo said. "We got split up, but she's fine."

The pretty blond patted Juugo's head. "S'all good, Juugo.." The red head carefully set her on the ground and Naruto looked at Sasuke. "He said this place was a dead end…so we move onto the next hideout?"

Sasuke was looking at her like she lost her mind. "Naruto. What the hell?"

She frowned at him. "What do you mean, 'what the hell'?"

They glared at each other for a long time, and Suigetsu felt like they were having a silent conversation with each other.

Finally, Naruto snorted. "I'm fine, you stupid bastard."

Sasuke glared. "You could have gotten hurt."

"I could get hurt everyday of the year, whether or not I'm pregnant okay? What happens, happens. Get over it, and let's move on." The blond said stubbornly. Then she added with a slight bitter tone, "The sooner we get to Itachi…the better."

The albino smiled at Sasuke. "See, she's completely fine! Nothing to worry about!"

The avenger was still frowning. "She's six months pregnant…in a month she'll already be in her third trimester."

"I'm not though; I'm only in my second. I can still fight!"

Suigetsu noticed Karin looking confused, but she didn't say anything.

"Moron…" Sasuke growled between clenched teeth.

Naruto rolled her eyes. "I'm. Fine. If I can still throw a rasengan…I'm fine. Okay?!"

The brunette looked unconvinced. "Dobe, you've been exhausted lately. You look like you haven't slept in days. I think we should take a break…we've been raiding hideouts fruitlessly for the past month and a half."

Suigetsu squinted at the blond, and realized that yes, she did have shadows from lack of proper sleep under her eyes.

Naruto looked at Sasuke irritated, "Teme. Would you just shut the hell up?"

The two glared at each other again, and Sasuke suddenly activated his sharingan. Red bled into his eyes and the three black koma spun hypnotically as he looked into Naruto's eyes. Her blue eyes glazed over before she fainted and Sasuke easily caught her in his arms. He hooked an arm under her limp legs while the other arm supported her back. Cradleing her, he turned to his teammates.

"I think we should find a nearby village. She needs to rest…whether she likes it or not."

Suigetsu chuckled. "She's going to be pissed when she wakes up."

"Be that as it may," Sasuke said. "She needs to sleep. I know she hasn't been for the past month. It's not healthy for her, she could put her life in danger." He started to walk out to the end of the forest, and his teammates followed him, "She can scream at me all she likes, but I'll tie her down to the bed if I have too."

Suigetsu raised an eyebrow when Juugo had a sudden coughing fit. "Are you alright, freak?"

In between coughs, Juugo muttered. "Um…yeah…I'm fine."

**

* * *

**

They'd found a slum city about three miles away and were staying at an inn there currently. It was convenient because it had plenty of shops and people kept to themselves, but the inn left something to be desired in Karin's opinion. It wasn't moldy and disgusting…it was just an old building and seemed tired.

Sasuke called Juugo, Karin, and Suigetsu for a team meeting (Naruto was sleeping in a room). He had cleaned and sharpened all of his weapons earlier and was currently putting them all into the appropriate pouches strapped onto his body.

"You three are going to guard Naruto. I'm going to one of the bases on my own. If I get any leads, I won't be coming back and I'll just follow the information to Itachi." He slipped a roll of razor wire into a holster on his forearm.

Karin glared. "Now hold on a second, I didn't join your team to be that girl's baby sitter!"

Sasuke stared at her levelly. "Karin. I'm not asking you to baby-sit her. I'm asking you to help Juugo and Suigetsu protect her while I'm gone, and meanwhile keep an eye out. I'd take one of you with me, but my stealth will be better if I'm by myself."

The scarlet haired girl frowned. "Yeah. Baby-sit. That's basically what you just said."

Sasuke sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose, aggravated. "I'm not going to fight with you about this. If you feel like you have something better to do, than leave our team. It'll be really irritating for me, but I'm _not_ going to have an uncooperative teammate."

She opened her mouth in surprise but didn't say anything, and Sasuke turned around as he put his cloak on. "I don't know how long I'll be gone. Like I said, If I get a lead, I'm following it."

Without another word, he walked out the door.

Karin made a garbled screaming noise in frustration and stomped to one of the rooms before slamming a door behind her.

Suigetsu rolled his eyes. "She's such a fucking drama queen."

Juugo sighed. "I'm just worried about how angry Naruto-chan is going to be when she wakes up."

The albino laughed, "I hope she loses it! That'd be hilarious."

The redhead sighed, worried. He wished everyone could just calm down and get along.

* * *

"I'm going to _castrate him in his sleep_." Naruto growled the second he realized he was awake. He was obviously in an inn; the ceiling above him was solid painted wood instead of the tree branches he'd grown accustomed to seeing. That, and he was far too comfortable, the bed under him was a hundred times softer than the ground he was used to sleeping on.

He couldn't believe this bullshit. Sasuke had forced him unconscious. He's never done that…ever. EVER. Not even when they were fighting at Valley of the End. Naruto got off the bed, pissed. He realized someone had taken his jacket, belt, and kunai pouches off and neatly put them on a chair. Naruto walked over to the chair and put on the jacket (he didn't bother zipping it, his stomach was almost too big for it now.) and strapped a kunai pouch to his leg.

He walked out of the bedroom and blinked when he saw Karin, Juugo, and Suigetsu playing cards in the main room. Suigetsu noticed him first and grinned. "Heeeey. Have a nice nap, blondie?"

Naruto frowned. "Uh. No. Seeing how that bastard induced it with his damn Sharingan. Where the hell is Sasuke? I'm gonna kick his ass."

The albino laughed, "I'd pay to see that."

The blond fumed. "No. Seriously. Where the fuck is he?"

Juugo shuffled the cards in his hands nervously. "Um…He went out."

"Where." Naruto said. Not asked. Said.

Karin crossed her arms and leaned back on the sofa, pissed. "He went to go look for any leads on Itachi. He made us stay here to watch you."

Naruto greeted his teeth. "WHAT."

Suigetsu sighed. "Mmmmmyyeaaaah. We have no clue when he'll be back."

Naruto felt his body shaking. "That…I can't believe what a fucking coward he is. What, is he afraid of getting his ass handed to him by me or something?!"

The albino chuckled."Maybe."

The blond looked about ready to throw a fit and Juugo interjected quickly as he stood up. "Naruto-chan? Why don't we go for a walk? If you want, I can spar with you a bit too."

Naruto ran a hand through his spiked blond hair and groaned. "Yeah, fine. Thanks. Let's do that."

He walked out of the door to their room and Juugo followed him, closing the door as he walked out.

Suigetsu blinked at the closed door and than looked back at Karin and made a disgusted face. "Oh shit. I'm stuck with you now. Fuck…got any fives?"

Karin smirked. " 'Go Fish' asshole."

He frowned. "That's not funny."

"Fuck yourself with a sandpaper condom."

"Bitch."

"Kappa."

* * *

Naruto was staring to feel a little bit better after breathing in some of the fresh air. He and Juugo opted to head into the forest instead of the town, it was quieter and Juugo's murder instinct would less likely be triggered. Naruto frowned at that thought. It wasn't a good idea that Sasuke left Juugo alone, what would happen if the red-head lost it and Sasuke wasn't there to control him with the Sharingan? That would be…wow…really bad. What the fuck was Sasuke thinking?

What else, but revenge? It was irritating…On the surface Sasuke seemed to care about him, but deep down his brother was all he thought about. He sighed. That was the way it's always been though. Always.

They had just entered a forest clearing and Naruto jerked in surprise when he walked right into Juugo who had stopped moving. He rubbed his forehead. This guy was built like a rock. "Ah, sorry I wasn't looking where I was walking." Naruto said, grinning sheepishly.

He blinked, surprised when Juugo didn't say anything. "Oi, Juugo. Why'd you stop?"

Naruto walked around and looked up at the red head. Juugo was staring straight forward, unblinking. "Juugo?" He lifted his hand up and waved it in front of the man's face. Nothing. He was still just staring in front of him, still not even blinking."What the hell?"

"He won't hear you."

Naruto whipped around in surprise and felt the blood rush from his face and a huge chunk of lead dropped into his stomach.

"I…Itachi?"

The man, Sasuke's brother was standing across from him on the other-side of the small forest clearing. He came out from the shadows of the trees so Naruto could see him better. His garnet red eyes were lidded as usual as he looked at Naruto in a detached way. It was alwasy so eerie to naruto just how much Itachi and Sasuke looked alike. Granted, Sasuke was more handsome and Itachi's hair was longer and had those deep lines on his face.

"I'm glad I was able to find you, Naruto-kun. Though, I've met you enough times that I can seek you without too much difficulty.

Naruto kept one hand on Juugo's arm, still trying (and failing) to wake him up. "How did you know it was me?"

Itashi quirked an eyebrow. "Naruto, you're looks and chakra are rather hard to mistake for another's. Even if you currently have the body of a female…and appear to be pregnant."

"Uh…yeah. Okay. It's a funny story. You'd laugh your socks off…if you were wearing socks."

There was a drawn out silence until somewhere in the distance, a crow cawed.

Itachi shook his head lightly. "I've come to talk with you, your friend is fine. He's just trapped in an illusion, he'll be completely normal once I release him."

Naruto frowned, beginning to realize just how bad this situation was. Itachi worked for Akatsuki. The Akatsuki wanted Jinchūriki's. Itachi was ordered to capture Naruto, the Kuubi vessel. Itachi was right here. Naruto was six months pregnant and had very low chakra currently.

_Fuckkity-Fuck._

"I don't need to ask what you want." Naruto growled as he slipped some shurikan from his leg pouch.

Itachi looked back at him apathetically, as always. "No. I just want to talk. And I want you to listen to me and answer my questions. I'm not after you right now. As for the matter of your condition, that's irrelevant to me. I have no interest in your private life."

Naruto stared at Itachi. He felt like he'd fallen into an alternate dimension. "Are you for real?"

Itachi inclined his head. "Yes, I assure you I am most definitely 'for real'. I just want to talk."

If Itachi had wanted him, he would have already done something to him. He was an S-Class ninja, he could tell how weak Naruto currently was. The blond relaxed, and took another concerned look at the statuesque Juugo before taking several steps forward and Itachi did as well until they were fifteen feet away from each other.

"What did you want to talk about, Itachi?" Naruto asked. Itachi had always been something of a figure of fear and anger for him. Fear because he was always hunting Naruto down…anger because of what he had done to Sasuke. He was the last person Naruto could picture himself having idle chats with.

_Oh yes, how about Itachi and I just go sit down at a lace doily covered table for tea and crumpets? I'll even take out my grandmother's china! We can talk about the weather, economy, and the subject of my untimely doom by his organization's hands. Charming._

"I won't waste anymore time." Itachi said. "You want to bring Sasuke back right? However, what exactly will you do if he refuses to return with you to Konoha?"

Naruto honestly hadn't expected Itachi to be interrogating him about his brother. "I'll do whatever I have to do to bring him back." Naruto said automatically. After years of being said, it rolled off his tongue without much thought. It was obvious.

The Uchiha looked at him blankly, "So you'd use force? I suppose that would work if he decides to come quietly. What if that plan falls out though?"

The blond shook his head. "What?"

Itachi blinked, and was quiet for a few seconds like he was attempting to word it in a way Naruto would easily understand. "What if Sasuke attacked Konoha? He's precious to you right? How would you handle that?"

Naruto frowned, irritated. "What the hell are you talking about? Why would he do something like that? Sasuke doesn't hate Konoha!"

"He might…very soon I think. I'm sure of it. Hypothetically…could you stop him from doing so without killing him? Would you choose Sasuke over Konoha?"

The blond glared at Itachi. "Why are they both mutually exclusive?! I'd save both, dammit! I'd stop Sasuke without killing him!

Itachi looked condescendingly at Naruto. "You need to stop living the dream that everything will always work in your favor just because you hope it will. There will be a time where you will have to make a painful choice. Whether to make yourself happy or to do something that benefits the world as a whole. Which will you choose?"

Naruto felt at a loss for a moment until he felt definite movement in his stomach. He put a hand over the swell of his belly and felt two feet kick him in response. He grinned at Itachi. "I won't bend my words in order for me to sound like I have some semblance of how the world really works. I know how it works. I don't have to like it though. I plan on changing it, and I don't plan on losing Sasuke or Konoha either. You can look down your nose at me all you like Itachi, but that's my ninja way. I won't change it for anyone ever."

Itachi looked back at Naruto, the same usual apathetic look on his face.

And then he very slightly smiled. "I see then. I shall impart you with this in exchange for your time and answers." He lifted his cloak back and dozens of ravens flew out from inside.

Naruto stepped back in surprise and tripped on something, he cried out as he fell backwards and landed on back on the unforgiving ground, hard. At that moment, one of the birds flew into his mouth and down his throat. Naruto coughed and grabbed at his throat in alarm. "What…what was that?!"

"Relax, Naruto-kun. That was just a fragment of my power that I'm leaving with you. Though, I pray you never have to use it." After he had spoken, Itachi's body broke into a flock of ravens and then scattered into the air.

Naruto coughed again. "Yeah…nice talking to you too. Ass."

* * *

"Naruto-chan!"

The blond turned around to see Juugo running up to her and he crouched down in front of her, alarmed. "Are you alright? Why are you on the ground, I didn't see you fall!" His hands were barely touching Naruto's shoulders, like he was afraid his touch might further increase any possible injuries.

The blond smiled, she looked relieved to see him. "Yeah, I'm just clumsy is all. I tripped on a pebble or something."

Juugo sighed, relaxing now that he saw that Naruto was fine and didn't seem to be hurt. "Please, be careful. You might accidentally hurt yourself or your child badly if you don't watch where you step."

Naruto reached out and ruffled Juugo's red hair. "Relax I'm fine, you worry-wart. I'm-"

The blond's words broke off and all the color drained from her face.

Juugo frowned. "Naruto-chan what's wrong?"

Naruto didn't answer, instead she stood up quickly and put a hand to her stomach carefully. She looked uncomfortable and said "There's a strain…like a stretching tension and-" Her eyes widened and she had turned white as a linen sheet.

"_**AAUGHH!!"**_

Juugo stood and quickly grabbed Naruto before she fell forwards on her stomach, "Naruto?! What is it? What hurts?!"

Naruto's fingers clutched hard onto Juugo's cloak, she was shaking in terror and pain. "Something's wrong with my baby! My stomach hurts _really_ bad …maybe it _was_ the fall. Take me to Karin, she's a healer isn't she?!"

Juugo nodded. He had to stop panicking. He picked Naruto up, cradling her into his arms and he jerked in alarm.

Rivulets of blood were flowing down her legs, seeping into the fabric of her pants and down her bare shins. He couldn't waste anymore time, Juugo held Naruto close to him and then sprinted with all his strength back to the inn.

**

* * *

**

_IT HURTS, I DON'T LIKE THIS! MAKE IT LIKE IT WAS BEFORE! MAKE IT BACK INTO THE SAFE WARM PLACE!_

_I CANT BREATH!! WHY CAN'T I BREATH?! SOMETHING'S WRONG SOMETHING'S WRONG!_

**

* * *

**

To be continued...

DUN DUN DUUUUUUN. *evil laugh*

So yeah...I'm sure you're all worried and stuff...I'll say this once:

**NO THE BABY ISN'T GOING TO DIE. **

Chill out. No babies are gonna die in my fic. Hope you liked it, even if Sasuke's a total ass in this chapter. I'm sorry if any character seems OOC.


	13. Welcome to Crazy Town

Diclaimer: The Naruto series and it's characters do not belong to me.

* * *

The inn woman, Kiyomi nearly dropped her tray as she saw one of her customers, that red headed man juggernaut his way through the inn door. He didn't spare her a glance and ran down the hall with the blond pregnant woman in his arms, She felt sick when she saw the girl he held covered in blood.

* * *

Sasuke had been traveling for about a day, searching bases himself and then leaving when he didn't find Itachi. Odd, but many of the Akatsuki bases in this area were abandoned. He paused when he felt a familiar chakra…above him.

Sasuke looked up at the broken electrical pole with a frown. There was a man perched on it. Well…more like a creature like man, one he was familiar with.

"Kisame…" He growled. "Where is Itachi?"

The shark hybrid laughed "Not even a 'hello', Sasuke-kun? How rude, where are your manners?"

The teen glared up at Kisame, not amused in the slightest. "I can't waste any energy fighting you, where is Itachi?"

Kisame sighed, and lightly bounced his massive bandaged sword on his shoulder. "Kids these days just don't know how to take it slow. But that's fine, I suppose. Your brother was expecting you, and I'm honestly surprised you don't have any little companions. I heard you were traveling with a group of four."

"I had them stay behind. I only formed team Hebi to make sure I could find him." Sasuke replied dryly, glancing around the wooded area he was in. It looked like it had once been a town, if the old buildings and rotting electrical poles were any indication. Up ahead behind Kisame there was a mountain that had been carved into. Sasuke was willing to bet it was hollowed out and was an akatsuki base.

Kisame leaned back. "Hmm. Wouldn't it have been better if they came with you? It would be rather problematic should I have decided to fight you before letting you meet with Itachi-san."

Sasuke was getting impatient. "Are you going to let me go, or are you going to attack. I don't have all day."

Kisame laughed. "Relax. Itachi-san told me to let you come. I was just here waiting because I assumed your friends would be here."

"You assumed wrong."

The water shinobi nodded. "That I did. Disappointing, I know that you have another water user with you, I was hoping to play with him a little."

"Well he's not here." Sasuke said from clenched teeth.

Kisame laughed again, "Go ahead and fight your brother little Uchiha-kun, I won't stop you. I hope Itachi-san rips your head off."

Sasuke didn't need any more invitation; he jumped and leaped over Kisame in the direction of the mountain.

Kisame sighed. "And now, I'm bored."

* * *

Karin and Suigetsu both dropped their cards in alarm when Juugo came barreling though their room door with what appeared to be a bleeding Naruto in his arms.

Karin stood up, eyes wide, "what the hell happened?"

Naruto was very pale and shivering violently as Juugo kneeled down with her on the floor. Naruto panted, "I saw Itachi. He did some crazy weird shit to me and I think I'm miscarrying." Her blue eyes honed in on Karin. "Karin-" Naruto cut of her words as she suddenly screamed and slammed her back against Juugo's chest in pain. "Get it out of me! It'll die otherwise!"

Karin emitted a short hysterical laugh simply because she thought the blond was joking,

"Get it out? Are you crazy? You're just barely seven months pregnant, and-"

"GET IT OUT!" Naruto screeched, "Use your kunai or whatever but get the baby out or it'll die!"

Karin shook her head, "You're insane." Naruto was about to scream at her again but after a moment of hesitation Karin brought her hands up into the signs of a simple sleep genjutsu.

Naruto's eyes closed and she collapsed back against Juugo's chest, unconscious and he carefully held her up close to him, supporting her back. "You're…you're not really going to do it are you?" He asked, voice scared.

In answer, she pulled out her sharpest kunai. "Suigetsu get some towels."

The albino stared at her, eyes wide and he laughed nervously as she had moments before,

"W-what? You're joking right?"

She snarled, "Get some _goddamn _towels, Suigetsu!"

He actually flinched before he fled the room to locate the innkeeper.

Karin licked her lips nervously and stared down at the girl she was about to cut open, she was glad she was borderline obsessive about keeping her hands clean-she didn't have time to wash them. Juugo hands were shaking as he unzipped Naruto's jacket before he lay her down flat on the floor. He undid her belt and pushed her pants down a ways past her hips so Karin wouldn't have anything in her way. He shuddered at how Naruto's face was pained even in sleep.

Karin took a deep breath_. Gods, this is stupid. This is bad_. The blood wasn't stopping though, Naruto really would miscarry-what would she do to Karin if she let that happen? What would _Sasuke _do? She put her hand over Naruto's stomach, trying to sense the life there. The baby's heart beat was becoming more and more frantic, it was struggling to live.

She sighed. _Okay._ A sick feeling heavy in her stomach, Karin brought the blade carefully down and sliced down Naruto's lower abdomen.

* * *

Sasuke entered the hideout, it was dimly lit and he walked forward, his steps echoing around him until he turned a corner and entered a hallway that had bright torches on the walls and a throne and-

Sasuke's breath caught in his chest before his heart began to beat fast as a hummingbird's.

"Hello, little brother." A cold voice purred, "I hope you have been well."

Itachi was sitting upon the throne, poised and collected as ever.

Sasuke felt his fists clench so hard, he was close. So, _so_ damn close.

"Tell me." His brother said, "What do you see with your Sharingan?"

Through clenched teeth Sasuke growled, "I see **you**. **Dead**."

* * *

The skin was easy, like cutting through paper. The muscle though was difficult though, and a chill went through Karin at the sound the blade made against the hard tissue, like she was trying to cut a very hard piece of meat. Eventually it split apart, and all that was visible was the smooth, shiny pink flesh of the womb.

There was movement inside, she could see the baby. Karin held her breath as she pushed the kunai carefully against the womb and slide the blade down.

She felt as though she was in a daze as she reached in and pulled the tiny infant out which promptly started wailing as it took in air the moment she cleared its nose.

Karin's gaze slide down its tiny purple body. Female. The tiny girl had an amazing set of lungs and was crying her discomfort as she squirmed in Karin's uncertain grasp.

"Karin." Juugo said with a tone of desperation. "Heal Naruto, she's bleeding too much."

"Oh r-right. She set the squalling baby in the crook of Juugo's arm and pushed her wrist into Naruto's mouth, forcing the new mother to clamp down her jaw to take in the chakra. The little girl in Juugo's arms began to _scream _and Karin suddenly ripped her wrist away from Naruto's mouth,

"What the hell is wrong with her?"

He looked down at the tiny girl wailing in his arms as though she was being tortured. "I don't know! I-I don't know!"

Karin looked down at Naruto and her eyes widened when she noticed something that made her blood freeze.

Juugo frowned. "Karin? What are you doing, _heal _her!"

Karin blinked furiously in confusion, and reached down into Naruto's womb again. Juugo was about to ask her what the fuck she was doing and _why the fuck _was Karin not healing Naruto when the redhead pulled a second infant from the young blond woman. This one wouldn't cry and Karin pinched its foot until it started wailing pathetically. She looked at Juugo dumbfounded.

"Twins. I…I didn't even sense there was a second one. Why couldn't I sense it?" Shaking a little, she quickly passed the second infant to Juugo, who stared down at the baby with surprise. Karin couldn't sense it? He looked between its legs, it was male. The newborn whimpered a little in his arms and moved closer to his warmth.

Karin shook off her bewilderment with the infant that had been hidden. _Heal Naruto, ask questions later. _ She pressed her wrist into Naruto's mouth , looking down and watched as slowly but surely, the skin on Naruto's abdomen started to fuse back together, removing any traces that she'd been cut open.

Juugo covered up the babies with his cloak, holding them close to his chest to keep them warm. He sucked in a breath when tiny eyes opened to look at him; they were pitch black just like their downy blood covered hair was.

"Holy Gods, It looks like you murdered her!"

Juugo and Karin both looked up to see a stunned Suigetsu (towels in hand), with the Inn-woman Kiyomi behind him with a pitcher of hot water. Suigetsu's eyes scanned the scene, Gods, the blood was _everywhere_. The copper smell invaded his nose, normally he didn't mind but it was _Naruto-chan's._

Kiyomi crouched down and placed the pitcher of hot water by Karin, "You're shinobi? You healed her, so she'll be fine right? We don't have a midwife or doctor in this town, it's too small."

Kiyomi eyed the twins before she looked over at Juugo then back to Karin, "They need to be warm, and they need their mother's milk. Cut the umbilical cord and clean them off."

Juugo gingerly handed the tiny squirming girl-infant to Karin. She carefully cut the life cord, tying it off with some wire she had attached to her belt. The excess umbilical would shrivel and fall off in a day or so. She passed the infant over to Suigetsu who took the towel Kiyomi handed him and (after dipping it in the warm water) carefully wiped the blood off of her. He took another towel, this one clean and dry to swaddle the baby girl in. The baby squinted up at him-and Suigetsu squirmed under her scrutinizing gaze. They repeated the process with the much less fussy boy-infant.

"Yeah. This is Sasuke's kid alright." He gave her back to Juugo who gladly took her; he liked babies as much as he liked animals and held the tiny boy in his other arm.

A calm settled over the occupants of the room, the worse was over and it seemed that besides some minor mental trauma, everyone was fine.

Kiyomi frowned at all the blood on the floor. "Is she going to be alright?"

Karin sighed, "It's okay. She's lost _a lot_ of blood though. I don't know what type she is."

Juugo passed Karin the girl so he could dip his finger in a puddle of Naruto's blood and brought the stained finger to his tongue. After a pause he said, "She's B positive."

Suigetsu made a face at Juugo, "Has anyone ever told you you're creepy as fuck?"

Juugo's eyes stared intently at the albino, ignoring the insult. "You're B positive too, Suigetsu."

Now Suigetsu looked horrified. "How the fuck do you even know that?"

Juugo smiled at him-which unnerved everyone but the unconscious mother and new infants in the room.

Karin sighed and stared over at the babies. "Welcome to crazy-town, kids, population: Seven."

* * *

Sasuke grunted when he was thrown up against the wall, Itachi had managed to find an opening in his defense and had exploited it to his advantage.

Itachi's arm shot forward, with his fingers pointed straight and flat and Sasuke managed to move his head in time, simultaneously drawing his sword and swung it forward only for Itachi to grab his shoulders and use the leverage to leap over him.

While his hands were still on Sasuke's shoulders, he pulled hard and threw Sasuke over his head, making his brother land on the stone floor hard enough that it cracked. Sasuke was still coughing from the air being knocked out of his lungs while he made the hand signs for chidori and shakily stood up.

Itachi was ten feet in front of him, his expression unreadable and frozen in place.

Sasuke ran forward at Itachi, the chidori on his arm sparking menacingly-so much as he did when he was thirteen-but instead of trying to impale Itachi with his lightning ninjutsu, he slammed his hand onto the ground.

The lightning branched out on the floor and headed straight for Itachi, who managed to jump up, just as Sasuke had expected him to. Sasuke then drew his sword and rushed forward, sliding the blade through his brother like he was made of paper.

* * *

Naruto started to wake up, his head felt fuzzy but seemed to otherwise be fine. He was leaning against what felt like a warm broad chest. _Juugo_. Strong arms were holding him in place- no…they were holding something against his chest. Something very warm and soft and…and…it was...

It was sucking on his nipples.

Naruto's eyes snapped open in a shock, and Juugo must have felt him wake up.

"Naruto-chan? Are you alright?" His voice sounded sort of drowsy, like he'd been napping too.

"Um." He looked down to see two infants nursing on him, held in place by Juugo's arms so they wouldn't fall. Each of them was holding onto the fabric of Naruto's shirt, and holding onto his…breasts with the other hand.

"Um. Did…did something happen while I was unconscious?"

Suigetsu-who Naruto only now noticed was in the room-piped up.

"Yeah, you had babies courtesy of butcher style. Congrats!"

He was playing cards again with Karin who glared at him, "It's called a _cesarean_ section you dumb ass!"

Naruto brought one hand up, placing it very lightly on the back on the right infant's head. Its eyes opened to look up at him, pitch black orbs seemed to stare into him. Naruto sucked in a breath.

"Oh Gods. They look just like Sasuke. I don't know why I expected anything _less_ though. Bastard Uchiha."

Naruto didn't notice the collective sigh of relief from the other three young adults in the room.

The blond cleared his throat. "Why…why do I have two though?"

Karin leaned back on her arms. "Because you had twins obviously. Did you know that you were pregnant with two?"

Naruto shook his head, "No I didn't even-" He paused. Now, he didn't know a lot about infants but something didn't seem right. "Wait. Aren't these little guys a few months early? They…they're small but they don't look underdeveloped at all."

Karin squinted at the infants. "I know what you mean. And it doesn't make sense to me. They're small yeah, but no more so than any other month early preemie baby. They shouldn't look that healthy, I don't understand to be honest."

Naruto petted the soft black hair of the other infant, was it because of the Kyuubi? Something in the chakra that helped them develop faster than normal?

He realized he was smiling with relief. They were okay. They didn't die because of whatever the fuck Itachi did. He grinned wider, and ran his hands down their soft backs.

"What are you going to name them? "Juugo asked quietly, with an obvious inflection of curiousity. "Oh, and the one on the right is a girl and the left is her younger brother."

Naruto hummed thoughtfully as he tried out a few names in his head. "Lessee lesseeeee. What to call them...?

Karin frowned. "Shouldn't you wait for Sasuke?"

Naruto stared down at them for a moment before he said with conviction,

"Fuck him; they came out of _my_ vagina."

Karin rolled her eyes, "Technically, they came straight out of your uterus."

Naruto pouted, "Whatever. I'm not changing my mind. They're gonna be Katsu and Juurin. I just decided. Katsu's the girl, Juurin's the boy."

Suigetsu cocked his head, "Um, what? I've never heard those names before, what do they mean?"

Naruto grinned, "They don't mean anything. I just took some syllables from each of your names, and scrambled them together. 'Ka' and 'rin' from Karin, 'Juu' from Juugo, and 'tsu' from Suigetsu. Great, right?"

There was a collective silence, and Karin actually felt oddly touched. "Why would you do that?"

Naruto blinked. "Isn't it like, tradition to name your firstborn child after the person who delivered it? All three of you helped sooo yeah. Though, Karin did actually cut me open and stuff, that's why she gets both syllables from her name mixed up in there."

Karin shook her head. "Um. No. You're supposed to name your first born after either you and Sasuke or your parents or Sasuke's parents."

Naruto made a face. "I don't know my dad or mom's name, and Mikoto is a pretty name but I don't wanna name my kid after a dead person, it's just sad. I didn't even know Mikoto that well, and same with Fugaku." He thought a moment before smiling. "I do remember she bought me ramen once. She was nice."

Karin desperately took in all this information. Sasuke-kun's mom's name was Mikoto-san and his father was Fugaku-san? She cleared her throat, "Um, Naruto-chan what…what was Sasuke's family like? You seem to know him back from he was a child, ne?"

Naruto looked down at the tiny babies in his arms the girl's black eyes stared back at him unwaveringly while her brother continued to nurse.

"They all looked like him. Variations of Sasuke. Even his mom looked like him. Or…I guess he looked like them is the right way? Fugaku, Sasuke's dad…I never met him, I just saw him around the village at times. He looked stern I guess. I was just a kid though and all of the Uchihas were scary to me. I remember Sasuke was always with his br-" He stopped himself.

_Itachi._

Naruto felt the color drain from his face. "How long has it been since Sasuke left?"

Juugo raised his eyebrows, "Um, since yesterday."

That wasn't unusual, Naruto supposed. Hopefully he was just being paranoid and-

"Hey." The blond said.

The other three looked at their co-leader expectantly.

"Sasuke left me here because I was pregnant right? He didn't want me to get hurt?"

Karin closed her eyes. _Oh Gods, here we go._

"Sooo. I'm not pregnant anymore so that means…we should go after him right?"

Juugo looked nervous, Suigetsu looked excited, Karin forced herself to look disapproving even if she really did want to go too. "Naruto. You just had a baby. I mean babies."

"I don't feel like I did." Naruto smiled to himself, being possessed by the fox demon sucked, but at least it healed him fast, and Karin's healing abilities really helped as well. He didn't feel a thing, he wasn't even tired anymore. Without a baby-er-babies sucking away at his chakra and energy, he felt better than he had in months.

Karin found it even harder to say no. She wanted to know if Sasuke was alright too. She felt out for him, she could feel his chakra in the distance towards the north-east.

Suigetsu coughed. "I bet he's gonna be pissed. His kid was born without him and all. We should probably find him as soon as possible.

Karin clenched her eyes shut, she unintentionally felt her feet turn in Sasuke's general direction.

"It's not like we'll miss him." Naruto said with a pout. "We'll be able to feel where he's headed, and if he starts to return this way we can totally intercept him without passing him.

Karin sighed. "I can't believe this; he's going so goddamn angry. But fine. Okay. Let's find Sasuke."

* * *

For a second, Sasuke had actually thought he'd done it, but the illusion of his brother's body being shredded to pieces dissipated before his eyes.

"Little brother, surely you didn't think it would be so simple."

Sasuke turned, his brother serenely sitting upon the stone throne.

"No…I didn't think it would be."

Itachi cocked his head, in the same fashion of a bird. "Tell me, are you hoping for this to end quickly, to relieve your burden…or are you hoping for our fight to drag on for hours, days even so you can suffer my demise?"

The younger glared at Itachi. "I don't give a fuck how long it takes to kill you so long as I do."

Itachi closed his eyes and smirked, "Ah, I see. You're the type of person who savors the destination, not the road it takes to get there."

Sasuke didn't rise to the bait, "I've been savoring the idea of you dead since I was twelve. Now get up and fight."

Itachi chuckled, but didn't stand. "I wonder who they look like?"

His brother frowned. "What are you talking about?"

"Oh, your children. I'm just wondering if they'll look like you or Naruto. Usually, dark traits like black eyes and hair are genetically dominant over fairer traits like blond hair and blue eyes. Also, Uchihas have had the same black hair and eyes for generations, and Naruto is dominant-recessive for his coloring. His father was blond and blue eyed, but his mother-"

"What the hell are you talking about?" Sasuke interrupted after collecting himself. He'd been initially startled when Itachi had suddenly started talking about Naruto, but now he was just furious.

"Oh, don't play stupid. I found Naruto alone a while ago. Imagine my surprise to find him as a woman. And pregnant. With your children. "

Sasuke was shaking, and he couldn't even _name_ the black emotions that were coursing through his body and his voice shook as he growled, "What…What did you do?"

Itachi smiled.

Sasuke attacked. 

* * *

"_Why haven't you updated yet?"_

"_I miss your story! Please update!"_

"_It's been a year, why haven't you updated?"_

"_Are you dead?"_

No no, I'm alive. The reason I haven't updated in so long was because I hate the direction Kishimoto has taken with the story, and I've stopped reading the manga altogether. But. I'm determined to finish this fic for your guys' sake, because it's not_ your_ fault I hate the manga now.

While I hate the direction Kishimoto has taken the series, I still passionately love the characters and what the story was before it looked like it had been thrown in a blender with poo.

Because I've been so angry, I took a time out from this fic. A long timeout. I am sorry that I made you all worry that I wouldn't update. I feel guilty for not. But I'm gonna finish this. I don't know how it will end though. I originally intended to write this story to follow somewhat along the cannon plot, but eff that. I'm not gonna make Sasuke all psycho and shit like that, he's insane enough as it is.

I want to give a huge hug to the loyal readers who supported me and still do, and to the ones that don't read this anymore, I can't say I blame you seeing as how I haven't updated for a few years.

...And yes. Before anyone asks, Naruto and Suigetsu do actually have the same blood type, B. Go on Naruto Wiki if you don't believe me.


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